Apologies + Tears = Forgiveness

Today started out like any other day. Lazy morning including cuddling in our big bed. Muffins to be mixed and baked. Elmo’s World to be watched. Football shirts to be dressed in. Friends to meet at the park.

It was a beautiful day. Full of sun, warm, considering that it’s autumn, with a brisk wind that reminds us that, yes, it is indeed November. Kids playing at the park. Laughing. Crying. Having fun. Being stubborn. You know, the usual.

My 2.5 year old son has some very special friends that we see a few times a week, every week. These are our go-to friends when we have some down time, need a shoulder to hold us up, or need someone to venture to the apple orchard with. Again.

Of these friends, there is one little boy in addition to my son. They are the only boys in the group and have naturally gravitated towards each other. Over the course of the last 6 or so months they have developed a bond that is unbreakable.

They run together through the sand. The swing together, laughing hysterically as “Hey, Now Grass!” is shouted with glee. They are BFF’s in the truest sense of the word.

As the morning wore on we made our way from the park to McD’s, someplace that I didn’t enjoy eating at before having the kiddo (the thought of the grease has me feeling sick to my stomach). But now, receiving an invitation to meet at the playland is like music to my ears. An enclosed area. Chairs to sit in as we watch the kids play. You can’t get much better than that.

McD’s was busy as we had arrived right during the lunch time rush. We stuffed the kids full of as much food as possible during the 30 seconds that they were willing to sit still, and sent them on their way.

The boys climbed. They asked for help. They played and played and played. They burned off energy and were utterly exhausted, but not willing to give in to their exhaustion. And then finally, a little scuffle broke out between the two BFF’s. There was some hitting and some shoving. A lot of tears. And possibly one momma (yes, it was me) wiggling through the child-sized fake tree to rescue the boy who was too upset to rescue himself. There were apologies (yes, my friend’s son apologizes, unlike mine) and tears were dried. All was forgiven.

I’m amazed that a scuffle like this between two little boys was resolved so quickly and peacefully. Emotions were high and yet they were able to let go of any hard feelings. As we walked out the door eager to get the kids down for their afternoon naps, it was as if nothing had happened. And the next time we see them, the boys will be BFF’s again.

I wish it was that easy as an adult. How often in life have you gotten into an argument with a friend, a big friendship-changing one, but when all the tears were dried, things weren’t the same. Words were said or actions done that can’t be undone. Feelings and egos were bruised and broken. Sometimes beyond repair.

I’ve lost friends in this life that I wish I could get back. From things said and left unsaid. It saddens me to say this, because I valued all of them during the time that they were in my life. Each and every friend has had an impact on my life.

Wouldn’t it be amazing if friendships as an adult are as simple and basic as they are when we are kids? Simply by brushing away the tears, saying I’m sorry (maybe a snuggle from mom) and all of the troubles would be forgotten. Friendships would be renewed, mistakes forgiven, lessons learned. Happy endings for everyone.

Have you have any past friends that you wish you could reach out to and reconnect with? Do you have any past friends that you wanted to apologize to, but couldn’t? Do you value all of your friends, even those no longer in your life?

Allison is a slightly OCD momma (yes, M& Ms must be eaten in pairs of matching colors) who blogs over at Alli ‘n Son and tweets @Alli(underscore)n(underscore)Son. She’s the momma of a spunky, energetic, and frustrating two year old boy. You can often find her up to the knees in potty training, bubbles and all things balls. She’s also a wanna-be photographer, gourmet chef, a highly creative woman, and one-time graphic designer, all rolled into one.