Hi--I've always been the kind of mom that is not as 'laid back' as some, in that, I am really concerned about sticking to my 2 year old's schedule for sleep. She has slept in the pack-n-play a few times, bot not for quite a while now---we went on a week long vacation to FL in March, and she did okay--except had some trouble at naps. We were invited to go boating Sat. with some friends, and it's a long car ride to get there---I don't like to do it, but figured we'd leave right at her nap time and assume she'll sleep in the car..then we are most likely going to spend the night----just wondering if anyone else has anxiety about situations like this. I don't want her to cry or be scared, but I know we can't always stay tied down at home either. I should just chill out right? :)
yep chill out.
Go just before naptime or at a meal time. Get her a snack when you leave she'll be out before you know it.
Both of my kids have been known to falls asleep with a half eaten chicken nugget in their hand.
She's gonna have to do things other than at home. If she does cry or get scared, she will get over it. And so will you. She's not always gonna be doing things or be presented with situations in life where she's always gonna be familiar or feel safe.
I always have anxiety about my son getting his nap on time too. But being "off" on her schedule for one day won't be a big deal. Depending on what you say is a "long" car ride, she'll get a decent nap. For my son, 10 minutes is better than no nap at all. If she doens't sleep her normal amount of time, she may be fussy that evening, but she'll get over it if she enjoys the boat. But she may be scared of the boat. You're her mom and only you know or can judge if she'll like it or not. My 2 yr old LOVED the boat, but we went very slow and he got to drive it some.
If you're really concerned about it, get a babysitter. High Schoolers and College kiddos are out for the summer. A 2-yr old is easy enough to take care of at bedtime and breakfast time. I haven't ever used a babysitter because I have family in town, but my husbands co-workers all love my son. I'd send him to one of them in a heartbeat if it meant time for me and my husband to have 'adult time.' Many of the co-workers have teenage kids that my son loves. He'd probably have too much fun to notice mom and dad aren't there.
oh and one other thought, when sleeping away from home, I always bring his regular 'bed toys.' He's always slept with his blanket, with his toy "Blue" and his toy "Killer" (the tiger) so they go everywhere when he takes a nap or spends the night somewhere else. He puts them to bed and whoever's taking care of him tells him that he's going to sleep in here with Blue and Killer. That way, it's not a big surprise come time to actually lay down in the bed.
Yes, try to chill out. You can't spend all your time revolving around baby. Hubby needs attention and you need to adjust going out and about with family.
It will work out.. it's amazing how the little ones adjust plus you have happy mom and dad!
Definitely chill out. I understand your feelings, but sometimes you just have to let go, and see what happens. She may sleep in the car, but she may not. She shouldn't be scared though, because you will be there, just try to keep things as consistent as you can.
A few weekends ago we had to go to a wedding that was smack dab in the middle of my son's nap. He slept for about 10 minutes in the car on the way there, and didn't sleep the rest of his nap. His sister was supposed to be awake while in the car, but slept. So, we had our 2 year old not getting any sleep and our 6 week old not getting any wake time. They were both a bit cranky, but the next day everything was back to normal and no permanent damage was done. :)
i suppose this isn't a good one for me to take on, since i totally don't get this anxiety. why set up your life and basically train your child to sleep only at certain times and in certain places? my babies learned to sleep in backpacks, on blankets in parks and at the beach, in playpens outside of the riding ring at the barn, in cars, and at grandparents' houses. i just cannot imagine regimenting my life around a nap schedule. i would have felt incredibly stifled.
i do hope, for both your sake and your child's, that you do chill out and don't sacrifice fun and adventures for the sake of adhering to some schedule.
khairete
suz
I think Suz said it best.
My kids are 20 and almost 16. About 5 years ago we traveled with some dear friends so all kids were teens or pre-teens. My daughter and the other girl couldn't share a room because the other girl was raised and continued to prefer, complete dark and absolute quiet! Just not sure how realistic that is in everyday life. Not that my daughter was loud or obnoxious but she would read herself to sleep with a little book light.
In my opinion, if we are more relaxed about things like this as parents, it makes handling the bigger issues of life a little easier because we're not "sweating the small" stuff.
Kind of. I agree that a schedule for a kid makes for a happy family but, after all, LIFE happens! I've always tried to keep a basic schedule but be flexible when we need to. Go and have fun!
Yes and no. I'm the same way, and I have terrible anxiety about it becuase I know it's not going to go well. I'm militant about DS's routine for bedtime, and he seldom naps well or sleeps outside his crib.
For us, napping in the car isn't the preference, but we do it because we just need to sometimes. It's not the best solution, but it works when you just can't rearrange your day around nap.
We're travelling next weekend and he'll have to sleep in the pack n play. I KNOW that's not going to go well. We've created a monster, where we've NEVER slept in the same room as him. Works great for home - no issues with putting himself to sleep, etc... - but can be problematic for travelling.
You should chill out about the scared/crying bit. If you're around, she'll be fine. You're there to comfort her as needed. And you know that she's going to have to cry to get to sleep.
Everyone else is right. The more you do it, the more she'll be used to it. But do what works for you.
I am the exact same way. I have a 5 yr old and almost 3 yr old and I am very routine oriented. I want them to nap at the same time every day and go to bed at the same time every day. My oldest son has always had a hard time adjusting to a different schedule and it's a lot of my fault b/c I have always sheltered him. I did things a little different with my second son. He is able to adapt to change much better. It's vert important to expose your children to different environments and experiences. My husband and I did not go any where for almost 1 year b/c my son would freak out where ever we were at bed time and I would freak out as well. This was not a good decision on out part. We created this horrible habit for my son and learned very quickly from this mistake. I have learned to relax a lot more. I have to remind myself when we are out that it's not the end of the world if our boys' routine is messed up for the day. It is not going to kill them and tomorrow is another day. I feel your pain :) Make sure you take her favorite blankie or stuffed animal to hep her sleep. I am sure she will be fine. Try to relax and enjoy yourself! Hope you have a great time!
I'm pretty routine oriented, but it's came back to bite me on occasion when we travel. My son has a really difficult time sleeping in the same room as us and it makes for hotel room hell. He's also not great yet about camping. We do travel to CA a few times each year to visit family and he works through sleeping in a pack and play in a few days and generally ends up getting somewhat enough sleep. That said, I don't fully agree with the make your children fit around your schedule mentality completely. Kids need routines, bedtimes, nap times and calm and peaceful places to lay their head. I think it becomes especially important when they go to school that they're always well rested. If I had continued to live my life as if I'd never had a child, it wouldn't have been exactly fair, so while adjustments can sometimes be made - routines can be great!
I keep a strict routine for my son...except for Friday nights and occasional sleepovers at a family members or friends place [maybe once a month]. Those are the only exception, and boy do I hear about it from my mom! "Oh you're going to let him stay up?" "He is going to have a really hard time getting back to normal", "He will be cranky tomorrow", "Will he be able to sleep at _____'s house?" Etc! But you know what, it's working for us, and that is all that matters.
Don't assume your daughter will have a hard time or that things will go badly, because then they will. If you keep a positive attitude & have fun, your daughter will too.
While I agree sticking to a schedule is great idea but your child should learn to sleep anywhere she is. There may come a time when you are not at home and she needs to sleep but won't because she isn't in her own bed. I wouldn't wait until after her nap, go right before or in the middle of her time that way she will sleep in her car seat. And yes Chill out mom, being a little diverse isn't a bad thing.
I agree...don't just anticipate things won't go well. I was the same way the first time we were away from home and the first time we flew and all went great. I am all about sticking to a routine at home but your on vacation so relax and enjoy...and let her enjoy. So what if you might have a day or two to adjust back. Is she in a crib now? The pack n play is probably fine then. My 2 1/2 yr old is in a toddler bed so I found him an aerobed mattress for kids that he loves. I wwouldn't overthink it and have a good time!
I wouldn't say that I have anxiety about it, but I definitely try to think up my strategy for situations like that! We've traveled with my now 16 month old son since he was about 2 months old. Nothing big, just weekend vacations to my husband's parent's house about 6 hours away from home. At first we never had issues because of course, it didn't matter where we were, the right blanket, stuffed animal, bottle of milk and parents were all he needed. Of course, as he got older things changed and that's when we had to think up our game plan! I wouldn't say you need to "just chill out," I think its just part of being a good parent that you worry about the well being of your child. What we've learned through the last few visits is that it doesn't matter much because there's so much to see and do that he's absolutely pooped by the time we're putting him down to sleep. Naps can get tricky because its hard to get an excited toddler to sleep so we would just have to make it an earlier night usually. Instead of naps we'd do rest times. Take the blanket she usually uses, if she has a security blanket or stuffed animal, take that. My son uses an ocean wonder's aquarium and we always make sure to take that. You may run into a few rough spots, but just keep calmly going along with your normal routine. If you stick to it as much as you possibly can then it will help.
Good luck!
I always say you should get your kids on a schedule and then screw it up enough so that they can be flexible. It will all work out fine and just be prepared for a crabby babe - no big deal.
I’ll let everyone know how it turns out, but I wanted to say thank you to everyone who responded to my post. I know that I have more anxiety than necessary about these types of things, and I know that exposing my daughter to different situations is the best thing for her. I am looking forward to having a great time with my husband and friends. I plan on handling things with the next child a bit differently. You live and learn. Thanks for the reassurance and encouragement fellow moms!
Well–it all turned out okay in the end. We didn’t get her to bed until very late—it took a long time getting the boat off of the water–and somebody who had too much to drink barged into her room while she was still awake to get a game out of a closet—I just about had a heart attack! She went back down just fine, but not until well after 10pm. She woke up at 5:30am----we left their house around 730am and she slept in the car almost 2 1/2 hours…then to bed without a peep that night at 7pm! she slept until 545 this morning, and is her usual happy self—we survived, and had lots of fun on the boat 