OK.. here is my issue.. I have a baby girl who is 6 months old.. i want another baby so bad.. i just want a big family.. i am only 20 years old but i am a fantastic mother in my eyes... my husband is a bit older than me and has a wonderful job.. we just finish building our new house and we are financially stable i just don't know ... i mean i want like 5 kids because i .. well i don't realy have an excuse.. just because i want to. Do you think it is to soon or what? Would someone please reply back.. young with more kids or anyone.. plus i get kinda tired of people looking at me because i am a young mother but i guess i shouldnt really care! Well thank you!! I really need advice!
Well I am 28 and have a 8y/o a 19 m/o a 6m/o and am pregnant with a new baby due in October. So I say if it is what you want go for it. Just make sure your husband is on board as well. Good luck mamma!!
I completely understand how you feel. My daughter is only two months though. I loved having her so much. I am just so excited about having another. I am going to give it two years though. Since I am a single mom, I need to wait until I am financially stable. I would wait for atleast a year to have another. They say if you have one too soon it could cause some serious problems. If your obgyn said it is ok though then go at it. I really wish you the best of luck.
YOu shouldn't worry about what other people think. THey aren't in your family and it is none of their business if you have 50 kids.
Secondly I would personally wait a little bit longer.I would wait until my first one was a year old;before i had another.It will be very expensive buying diapers for two.But if you and your husband want another baby now;I would sit down and talk about it.See if this is what you want right now.If you decide you do;then by all means try.
hugs
My husband is the oldedt of 5 and his parents were married young. I fyou husband is in agreement go a head and plan for more. I would suggest 4 years apart that way you have an easier time prepairing your first born for the new arrival. If you have them too close you may not be able to keep up with both (you mentioned your days were exhausting, another baby would add to that) or feel like you aren't giving each the full attention they need. I've seen families with children born very close and the mother always seems very ragged. That's just my opinion.
Also I'm the eldest middle of three, my older half-sister is 9 years older then I and my younger brother is 4 years younger. I remember his birth and it was and easy change for me when he was born. I wish you luck. My final advice is do what you feel is right for you and your husband.
my 2 are 14 mos apart & though there were times I was ready to pull my hair out from changing so many diapers back to back then overall I'm really glad I had my kids 'all at once' so that as each phase is done (bottles, diapers, potty training...) then its done. I'd say wait a year at least for health reasons but then if yall want more go for it so long as its what yall both want.I'm also raising my sisters 4 kids so in all the ages are 8, 7, 5, 5, 4, & 4 so I know I'm done but by this age then its not that hard really physically. just an assembly line at supper... lol
I have four children. The last two are 18 months apart. It was very difficult for me to keep up with a toddler and have a newborn. From experience I would say wait for alittle while. Your body needs time to heal from having your baby and you mentally need the time to heal. you are very young and have plenty of time to have your babies. enjoy your youth. before you know it you will be almost forty and wonderng what if all the time.
Enjoy your daughter. If you get pg you may get sick and miss out on the new things she does. I'd wait until she was at least 18mths before trying. good luck! you are young and have a long time to achieve your dream! I was barely 20 when I had my first and I now have 4 living children (had 2 more babies but died shortly after, twins).
i think it all depends on how close you want the kids... also how hard to get pregnant before? do you have time/ patience for another right now? i have 3 kids, ages 4 and under and am 27, it is SOOO hard sometimes. follow your heart and gut. dont forget to ask your husband too. hugs
If that's what you and your husband want...GO FOR IT!!
I am 22 and i have 3 kids (4, 18 months, 8 months). The first two were 3 years apart...that is a great space. The last two are only 11 months apart and i do not suggest doing that. It gets really hard sometimes and i feel like i made my middle one have to grow up faster than if she was still the baby. I suggest not trying until at least 18months. Enjoy your first as a baby...toddler...then try. Good luck on whatever you choose. I think being a young mother is a great choice.
Hi Charli!
Don't worryabout everyone else....I have learned that I must do what is best for my family and myself. At 20, you still have many years to accomplish anything you want. Do you and your husband want to travel, get more education, or have more time with your daughter alone? That being said, I would encourage you to think about your family. A lot of kids can be a struggle financially, emotionally and time wise. If that is truely what you AND YOUR HUSBAND want, then more power to you. I come from a relatively small family, I always wished I had more siblings as I got older. And now with my own daughter, I wish she had more cousins her age etc...
Like I said earlier, don't do anything to please others. Search your heart and your husbands' too, if the time is right and the circumstances are right, follow your heart.
Ashley
You do whatever you (and your hubby) feels is right and then you know that you didn't do anything wrong. My children are 2 1/2 years apart which was a bit closer than hubby and I wanted, but I wouldn't change it for the world now. That being said, I would at least wait until your child is walking, talking, and able to amuse herself for small periods of time before I considered getting pregnant again. It also depends on how your first child was delivered. If she was a c-section, I belive it can take up to a year for your body to completely heal from the birth. My best friend (mother of 4) had her middle 2 children 14 months apart and the oldest of the 2 ended up having speech delays and a few other emotional problems because she wasn't able to focus the needed attention on him because she got pregnant when he was only 5 months old (it was a difficult pregnancy for her as well) and she wasn't able to spend the much needed bonding time, or even play time with him because she had the new baby to care for. It still bothers her because she feels like the "slighted" the older child to care for the younger.
We have a lot in common. I was 19 when my first was born and 21 when my second was. I am 23 now. To be 20 and want another child so badly, you must really love kids! It isnt a question of wether or not you SHOULD get pregnant, it is a question of do you and your husband WANT to get pregnant. If you both agree on wanting another baby, then go for it! You cant live your life for what other people want or think. You have to do what makes YOU and your family happy.
I know how you feel about people looking down at you for your age. I have went and continue to go through the same prejudice. You know what, WHO CARES. I think that at 23 I am still young and have the energy I need to chase after two hyper-active children, and Im not ashamed to act like a child myself sometimes. I think our young age helps us, because we are still in touch with that "inner-child".
As long as there are no medical issues, if you think you are ready...then why wait!
Being a young mother will get strange looks. I was 18 when I got pregnant with my first one. Now I'm 38 but most people guess me to be between 18 and 26...hmmm...wonder if I can bottle and sell that...lol. I have 8 kids of my own. My closest ones are 18 months apart. The bad thing about that is that I had to buy pampers then pull-ups for 2 instead of one. The good thing is that they potty trained at the same time and it seemed like it took less time to get them potty trained. My son, the oldest of the 2, is a bit of a slow learner and my daughter, the youngest of the two learns very quickly and was able to help him learn closer to her pace. Another good thing is that relationship wise, they are pretty close and do almost everything together. All of my kids are close to beging with, but they have a closer bond of all of them. The bad thing about a huge family is that money is tighter and you have a little more trouble finding a vehicle big enough for everybody. But I honestly have to say, I don't regret a single one of my kids and we always have a really good time together. I am truely thankful for each and every one of them. As far as weather or not you should have another one right now...talk to your husband and see what he thinks. You own your own home, you say that you're financially stable, so right now it's more about weather the two of you think that your family is ready for another one right now or if you should wait.
Only you and your husband can determin when you are ready for your second child. I have (will have) 3 myself and they are close together. I have a 3 year old, a 15 month old and am due in september. I am also the oldest of 5 and my parents spaced us out so that my mom got PG when we were one. It seams to be great spacing. WE are all very close and can count on eachother for anything. It is all up to you when your body is ready and how you think you can handle it. It is a challange at times but when you look at you beautiful child(ren) you can't imagian your life without them. Good luck!
Personaly, I think you should wait. Most doctors will agree that it takes a good year after pregnancy/childbirth for mom's body to get back to normal and fully recover and therefore say to wait a year before getting pregnant. You are young... nothing wrong with that... but you do have plenty of time to have a large family. You haven't hit the toddler stage yet... a 6 month old is very easy to take care of. But I would be downright exhausted if I had to take care of a newborn and a young toddler a the same time. My kids are 3 years and 2 years apart and even that 2 years seems too close at time. Taking care of a 2 year old with a newborn is exhausting!
All that said, I have friends with kids close in age and they all agree it's great -- once the kids are older. But they all sort of regret not letting the older be the 'baby' for a bit longer. And all agree it's ALOT of work the first few years.
Hey Charli!
I know that having a 6 month old baby is wonderful and the thought of even having another one is even better. I beleive in your dreams but my suggestion would say: wait!!! My reason is this. I know life is Grand and you are a young and happy wife but I would give more one on one time. If another baby was to come along that is more work. I would wait about another year. I wish you luck! Gods Blessing!
Ronda C.
Take it slow and enjoy your baby girl as she grows and matures with you as a new mother. You could really miss out on a lot by rushing it. The time to bond and learn a little from the mistakes we all make.
Congratulations, My suggestion to you is to wait a little while. If you are exhausted now - having a toddler and an infant is going to be very taxing. There seems to be alot going on in your life right now. With the baby and a new house in a couple of months. My advice to you would be to just pace yourself. You have plenty of time to achieve your dream of a big family. At 20 you are just starting your adult life and more than likely you are going to go through alot of changes. In due time all that you wish for will come but do it decent and in order.