My husband and I are disagreeing about what to do about Halloween this year, since it falls on Sunday. My inclination is to attend the ward Trunk or Treat, and on Sunday, we'll have pumpkin-shaped homemade pizza and play games as a family, just for something fun to do to sort of celebrate.
My husband, on the other hand, sees nothing wrong with trick or treating on Sunday, and thinks I"m being rude to leave our light off and not hand out candy.
Just to complicate things, our three boys will be dressed as 2 BYU football players and a baby cougar. So it's not like we'd be anonymous if we did go out.
I remember as a kid when Halloween fell on a Sunday, and we did just what I propose--we went to a Trunk or Treat only. And that memory has stayed with me all these years.
FYI, my husband has very different ideas about appropriate Sabbath activities, and he calls me a Pharisee because I don't want our kids out riding their bikes or playing at friends' houses on Sunday. He thinks anything is fine, but for some reason, neighbor kids can only play in the yard, not in the house on SUnday. And no shopping. Those are about his only limits on what's inappropriate.
Anyway, I am at a loss as how to handle this. I don't want to hand out candy, and I don't want to take the kids trick or treating, either. What to do? Any advice?
I don't really understand all the discussion over what to do with Halloween this year just because it's on a Sunday. What do people do when it is Monday through Thursday? It is still a school night. I think it's kind of expected that when Halloween is on a school night, you make an exception with bedtime and candy rules etc. because they are kids and should be able to celebrate and have fun on this day. Most teachers pretty much expect it as well.
Can he take the kids trick or treating, and you stay home? I personally do not see the harm in keeping the fun in Halloween even if it is a Sunday. Halloween is about celebrating family and the harvest, and for my family it is our favorite holiday, so I could not imagine not celebrating all aspects of it, but that is just me. Has your church specifically said not to participate?
Talk to your minister or whomever it is in charge of your church and see what they have to say about it. Maybe you can look at it like the Jewish religion-once sun is down on Sabbath it is over. It IS the religion where the Sabbath idea was first put out after all-in the ten commandments.
Halloween i s a totally childrens holiday. Let them trick or treat. We are only children for such a small amount of time, let hem have fun. You stay home and hand out candy.. I love treating the kids and seeing all of the clever costumes..
Seeing how the 2 parents disagree, I say go with the parent's choice that isn't a)depriving or b) harming the children....which would be your hubby!
Not saying that your choice is harming the kids...but it is depriving them of a basic childhood fun time, that most kids get to partake in...
Sorry to say this, but trunk o treating is kinda lame compared to regular trick o treating...when it's dark and you get to run up and down the
neighborhood streets collecting as much candy as you can, with your
siblings or friends...as opposed to walking in a small circle in the parking
lot getting candy from a car, c'mon now?! Don't you remember how much
fun Halloween was when you were younger?
Your statement about not being "anonymous" suggest to me you are more worried about what others will think of you and that maybe they will see your kids out and say something about you guys not being "good little Mormons"? If that's the case...you shouldn't worry about what others think of you...you as the parents should be the end all and be all of parenting decisions regarding your family!
I don't understand why you wouldn't want to hand out candy! That is one of the great parts of Halloween. If your neighborhood is big on Halloween and treat or treating, then it absolutely is rude not to hand out candy.
I say let them go trick or treating.. To me, it doesn't matter what day it falls on.. Whether it's a Sunday, Tuesday or Saturday.. The day it is, we went trick or treating...
Halloween is for children and I would take them trick or treating.. If your not going to be home and if you trust your neighborhood, leave candy outside your door. That's what we do when we walk around with our son and are not home. :0)
Here's my belief..for all holidays, you need to celebrate it on the actual day. Otherwise, what's the point? Celebrating a holiday on any other day, doesn't make it that holiday. I mean i can make a Thanksgiving dinner in July, but does it feel like Thanksgiving....no.
For Halloween trunk or treats the day before are great and all, but why even celebrate Halloween when it's not the actual holiday, when other kids will be out and about trick or treating and having fun?
Just my personal opinion. Whatever you do, have fun.
Halloween is on Sunday this year, wont be again for 7 years. Suck it up and indulge, it isnt gonna go away if you dont decide to give out candy. 7 years from now your kids will be grown up and you wont have to participate at all probably. Think about it that way and it will help you get through it this year. I think you are out numbered since hubby and kids want to play.... you gotta lose this one Mommy.
Trunk or treat is LAME! Ok being LDS I understand where you are coming from, but also being in love with Halloween I would soooo Trick-or-Treat. I think that is would be unfair to your kids to see all the other kids trick or treating around the neighborhood and they didn't get to go out because it so happens to be a Sunday. It also (I think) teaches more of the whole Sunday Mormon thing. You should always have God in your heart, so why must Sunday be the strict day? Could you on Saturday choose to be your Worship day at home, then Sunday be go to church then go trick or treating?? I totally agree with In my 30's already. You really shouldn't be scared about what others think of you. It's your and your familys lives and you get to do what you want with them. I'm not sure how Idaho and Utah differs, but If your neighborhood was as stuck up and "Strict and devout LDS" as mine is, then you have nothing to fear because half of them are drinking, swearing, and having affairs. Halloween will be the last of your worries.
I think "The Big Guy" will be fine with you trick or treating as long as you remember to always keep him in your hearts and what not. I've always found it silly to change a holiday just because it was on Sunday, and whenever there is one it isn't the same holiday because it's a day early or late. LAME!
We are in Salt Lake area. We have only one child left-- an 11-year-old. Our ward is not doing trunk-or-treat. (We have quite a small primary.) I do not want to take kids trick-or-treating on Sunday either. I asked our Primary President and she said it is quite generally accepted to go out on Saturday instead, so I guess we'll try that. Also, Dad's work is having trick-or-treating among the cubicles that want to participate. I expect she'll be fine. I am willing to answer the door both Saturday and Sunday and I don't even care if it is the same kids coming again.
Previous years, other places, now grown kids -- we did let trunk-or-treat be enough when Halloween was on Sunday. (So, ask people in your ward what they are doing?)
We have discouraged our kids from active play (riding bikes, etc) on Sunday. We have rarely let them go to a friend's on Sunday. We occasionally let them have a friend over with the understanding that it will be "quiet play". Our son often has his girlfriend over on Sunday for our family games or movies.
I hear you saying you don't want to do this, and that you have your reasons for it. So to me your husband should accept that. I always think in joint decisions if it is SUPER important to you then he need sto let it go for that reason. If it were super super important to him, that they go, then i would side with him, but he sounds like he is just going with the secular flow not that he feels strongly about it.
Probably the best advice would be to talk to other parents in your situation. Then you and he should get on the same page about how you will raise your kids. easier said than done.
I have no idea what trunk or treat is but I'm the daughter of a Lutheran minister and we were able to trick or treat on Sundays if that was when Halloween fell. In fact, in our community, trick or treating was held on the Sunday closest to Halloween and we never missed a one. Since your kids are not dressed up as satanic figures and just in fun costumes, I'm not sure what the religious issue is. Dressing up is fun and family time so have fun as a family. Maybe put a bowl of candy, fun pencils or snacks on the porch and leave your light on. Then you're not a kill-joy and the trick or treaters can help themselves. If you don't want to go and the kids are little, have your husband go with them and you stay home. Then everyone's happy.
You and hubby have to decide what works for your family. I'm also LDS, and I plan to let my kids trick or treat (only a few houses b/c they are only 3)and I plan to hand out candy. The way we do it, it's a time to visit with our family and friends and I don't think celebrating a holiday violates the sabbath. We have no problem what so ever having friends and family over on Sundays for dinner and games, but that works for us. We've even had our bishop over. =) I guess my advice is do what you believe is right no matter what anyone on here says. BTW, I don't think it would be rude at all if you decided to not hand out candy and just played games at home but you and hubby should definitely show an united front. Good luck!
I'm not LDS, but grew up in a small town in Utah. There was never any debate that there was no trick or treating on Sundays. It was always celebrated on Saturday or Monday. Trunk or Treat didn't exist.
I'd find out what the ward is saying. I don't know how big Meridian is, but if you have a lot of LDS families, I'm not sure you're going to see a lot of porch lights.
It is a little weird to me that your husband has other rules about Sunday, but thinks this is okay. None of my friends growing up would have been allowed to do anything like this on a Sunday.
What day has the city stated that trick -r- treating will take place? Around here the cities declare a day and time that trick -r- treating will take place. This year some cities are Saturday and other Sunday. We are going to take advantage of that and have the kids go out both days. It will be fun for them to get to dress up two days instead of just one.
I say let the kids go trick ot treating. It is a fun relief from all the stress they get at school and in life. Life is too short not to enjoy being a kid.
On Sunday, put a bowl of candy on the front step with a note. 'Sorry we missed you! Take a piece, but leave the bowl'.
I did this when we bought a house one year, but hadn't moved in yet. They left the bowl, and a ton of candy wrappers on the lawn!! We have neighbors that do this every year because they both want to walk around, not stay home and hand out candy.
For your kids, create a candy hunt throughout the house and backyard.