Okay, I know this is similar to something I posted awhile back but I am lost. My nine year old son once again, didn't make his AR goal (by 2 points) and therefore will not be able to go on the field trip they are taking on Friday. I could understand this if he hadn't been trying but he has. The problem is that the book he chose to read right now is Eragon, a very long and difficult book. He is really determined to read it though so I have been encouraging him. However, he is a very slow reader so needless to say he hasn't been able to take the stupid AR tests on what he has been reading at home. My view on the subject is thank god I found something that he will actually read but the school differs on that. The vice principal told me that as a parent I need to be making him read books that he can get through quickly and test on because that's just how it works...no exceptions. I feel like they are punishing him for doing what he is supposed to be doing and for actually trying. He has been begging me to let him stay home on Friday so that he doesn't feel humiliated by not being able to go on the field trip. He already has such a low self image and this isn't helping. Also, his teacher is supposed to be sending homework home nightly instead of the whole weeks packet because he is easily overwhelmed. Well she did it for a while but since coming back after break she's sending the entire packet again. I tried to get a 504 but the vp says all that will do is put it in writing and he doesn't want to do it. My guess is because of the paperwork. The problem is I don't even really know what a 504 does and if it will actually help. When I first talked to the vp in November he was going to get my son's small motor functioning tested because he has horrible handwriting, struggles with tying his shoes, and has a hard time buttoning his pants. He hadn't even looked into it! Also, in November I asked if my son could be tested for learning disabilities (per his counselors suggestion) and the vp totally dismissed me saying that because my son gets decent grades he doesn't have a learning disability. However, research I've done has said otherwise. He is also feeling really stupid because he can't pass addition on rocket math and his soon to be step brother that is a first grader has already passed it! My son is not fast at anything. He knows the material he just can't get it from his brain to his hand to the paper fast enough to pass. I just don't know what to do. I feel like every time we start to make a slight improvement they do something at school that sends him spiraling backwards! I don't know how to do this and I don't feel as though I am being taken seriously. I'm sorry this is so long but I would appreciate any suggetions you can give me.
HI, Jami,
what you need is an advocate to help you work with the school to get the services your son needs. What school district are you in? I am a professional family advocate and do this work in my practice every day. You can also find advocates through Peak Parent Center in Colorado www.peakparent.org or through the local chapter of ARC in your community regardless of what state you live in.
by the way it is a 504 plan, not a 405, and you can get all the correct info on that at www.wrightslaw.com. The VP at your school is blowing you off and it certainly sounds like your son might qualify for services. Feel free to email me directly and I'll help you get connected with someone in your community.
take care, Susan
I'm sorry you're going through all these difficulties. First, I think you're referring to a 504 plan, not a 405. A 504 refers to a Federal system. It's similar to an IEP (Individualized Education Plan). An IEP involves modifications in the way a student is taught. A 504 is simpler, easier to attain, and involves accommodations more than modifications. For example, if a student wears hearing aids but is otherwise healthy and able to participate in the regular curriculum, a 504 plan would not change the curriculum or the way the student is taught, but would mandate that the student be given preferential seating, or maybe not have to respond to oral questions, etc.
I would suggest that you not ask the school administration about a 504. In my child's case, that went nowhere. You need a doctor (an M.D., not a counselor or therapist) and you need him or her to briefly state your child's issues, and order some testing or that a 504 plan be fully explored. Then insist that the school comply with a physician's orders. A psychiatrist will know who in your area does testing pertaining to your child's reading, handwriting, learning issues, etc. Make sure that it's an actual qualified place with people with degrees, not anything holistic, chiropractic, counseling, etc. (nothing wrong with those but you need a person licensed, degreed, able to prescribe medications, etc for this).
I have learned that you need a very brief summary of your child to present to schools. In our case, the school ignored long diagnoses and long descriptions. I had to go beyond the local school to the district to get them to pay attention to the doctors.
I find it sad your son is in a school that acutally makes field trips something they have to EARN! When did that start?
Secondly, if he has some special needs, EVERYONE in that school should be on board to help him get the best possible education possible! I would now go to the district and address this,the PTA anyone that will listen.
I don't know guidelines and what the book situation is, however I think him reading that big book is amazing!
If he is struggling wiht tying his shoes, I would talk to your Pediatrician, get it in writing and take it to the district and pitch a huge fit.
I am so sorry, I hope someone listens. If we are truly in a time that field trips aren't just part of learning and they isolate someone, make them feel less then who they are, that is very sad to me indeed!
God Bless
hi
jami,
sorry that i am typing with all lowercase letters, but my baby is asleep in my arms.... a couple of things... you can go to the colorado department of education website or just your school district's website and research 504 plans. Basically they are accomodations provided by the general education - classroom teacher. your child may also have a learning disability..and you could ask to speak with the school's special ed. team or with someone at the district level. They will work with you on an intervention plan for your kiddo. if the plan doesn't seem to be effective, you can ask to meet to modify the plan or for the special ed.evaluation. in the meantime check out ldonline.org. They have great resources. i wish i could help you more...good luck!
lisa
mom and a special ed. teacher
The vp is not doing what you need so try escalating the issue, and if it is not progressing keep escalating. Your son is doing what they claim to want - actually learning -but they aren't testing for that, they are only going for quantity, not quality. This is unacceptable and if necessary take it to the school board and see if you get what is needed. The down side of doing that is that they may hold a grudge at the lower levels. There should be more concern over content and learning rather than merely the appearance of progress.
Years ago I had a similar problem and changed schools, that may be an alternative as well. Depending on where you live there may be a university running a labratory school which could be a excellant alternative and give wonderful results.
Good luck and keep fighting for what is right for your son.
I am sorry you are going through this with your son.
Check out this link to help you with the difference between a 504 vs. an IEP. My son is on an IEP for fine motor issues and speech and he also has an ILP for reading. And to reiterate what Elena had said, I have heard that the IEP is the better way to go.
http://specialchildren.about.com/od/504s/f/504faq2.htm
My experience, through speaking to other parents, is that some schools fight the whole special ed process for the extra funds needed/allocated for these kids. Some teachers and administrators have gotten nasty. You could always look for a parent advocate in your state. It worked well for one family to get their point across but they eventually went to a charter school because they were termed "adversarial" when they tried to get their daughter help, who now at the charter school gets the support she needs. I really think a parent advocate would be the next logical step for you to express what you think your son needs. We also have a program called Child Find and you don't need permission from representatives of your school---you set up the appointment yourself but they will likely ask for input from your son's educators as part of the evaluation.
I will say I have to agree with the Asst. Principal in the aspect that I would be choosing books within your son's level that are not chapter books---just to avoid the disappointment you are facing now and not putting so much pressure on him, regardless of the fact he REALLY wants to read this book.
Best wishes.
I'll start by saying that I have no idea what I'm talking about, because my kids haven't started school yet. But i've been looking into them and calling the school district, and something you said rung a bell. The lady I talked to said that if a parent wants to have their child tested, they have to test. This was for a different sort of thing, but it seems like they should test if a parent has a legitimate concern.
Maybe you need to call up the school district. Be nice and ask them what their policy is about testing for learning disabilities. They may be able to help you, but even if they don't, you'll be armed with knowledge when you go talk to the school again.
Good luck!
You've got to get something in writing. You're right, the school doesn't want one because then they are legally bound to abide by it -- more work for them. I just had a great class on this for parents. Every school district nation-wide has a student's advocate. Find out whose yours is and let the VP know you will be contacting so-and-so, give their name, if you don't get some help. The class I took said warn the school before you bring in the advocate, but feel free to use them. It works better if you work up the system rather than trumping the system. Also, check out www.interactivemetronome.com. It has done wonders for our son. My mom works with them and some of her best improvements come from kids with ADD and ADHD. If you need some more help, my mom would love to talk to you, if you're interested. She's in Denver, but has worked with parents in other states, so is familiar with laws and such. GL! I hope you can get some help soon!
I think you've gotten some good responses, and I hope you can get the help your son needs.
I did want to say though that I had a very hard time in school, with reading, and anything that I had to study. I have been in your sons situation with reading and I am now dealing with the same thing with my 9 year old daughter. I agree that they need a "just right book". This one has been hard for us too, but I told my dd she would have to pick a shorter book just to get through her book report, then she could read her other book later. We went to our public library and went through several books before we found one that we both agreed on, shes almost finished with it and will have plenty of time to work on her report. I think they really need to feel the sense of accomplishment of finishing on time.
I have a lot of baggage I've had to work through over the years from being in special ed. I felt so stupid. I would suggest you talk to him and see how he feels about it first. I think I would try just about anything before putting my children in special ed because of my experience.
I also just thought of something. I took a speed reading course as an adult, I'm sure there is something like this for kids. It sounds from what you wrote, like this might be all he needs. (I know you can't write everything and being his mom you probably know if this is true or not, so just a suggestion) You could check on line for an at home course, or get tutoring outside of school. I think if you could help him without putting him in special ed, it would be a lot better for his self esteem. At this age it seems like it's all about self esteem, but I have a girl, so she's emotional anyway:)
Good Luck!
Hi Jami,
Wow, you don't mention where your son goes to school, but wherever it is, I'd be raising hell (pardon my language) for the schools lack of concern, help, assistance, etc... I agree with you on your sons choice of reading material, kudos for him to want to push himself when obviously the school could care less. My first line of action? I'd call the school superintendant and voice my concerns, the lack of help from the teacher AND vice principal. I'd not only do this by phone, but also by Email or ''snail'' mail! (Are you by any chance in the Denver public school districts? Sounds like them!) I have two hearing impaired kids, so I know what its like to get the schools to actually LISTEN to you...my son started out in DPS and the smartest thing I did was pull him out of it and send him to Cherry Creek Schools! (There are other equally good schools, that just happened to be where I sent him, my daughter is in Douglas County Schools, a Senior this year, and tho she could of graduated this month, has chosen to stay in school with her friends...son graduated way back in '91!) I don't know your situation and if a change of schools would be possible for you, but I would certainly consider it if going to the Super has no effect. I personally find it inexcusable for the teachers AND VP to ignore your concerns, and/or make light of them,and think only of whatever tests THEY have to fulfill. Its suppose to be about the kids, getting an education, learning at the rate of their abilities, pushing them to try harder, go one step further. Thank goodness my kids had the teachers, schooling, curriculum, etc... they needed to meet and exceed their goals as well as tho set forth by the teaching staff. I'm very proud to say my daughter is an honor student, she didn't have it easy (being hearing impaired she had to push herself much more than any of her peers), and all her teachers throughout her school years have consistently encouraged her, worked with her, and kept in constant contact with me or her father. I wish you lots of luck, I hope you can give your sons school a wakeup call, but more importantly I hope your son receives the education he deserves!!
I want to start by saying I know nothing on this subject. But I am alarmed by the school's complete lack of help on this subject. It doesn't sound like a healthy place for him. Have you thought about switching schools? I know this may be difficult and untimely, but if it's for your son's own good, it's definitely worth it.
You might also talk to an independent specialist. This could give you an outside opinion and allow you to have more insight into what your son is struggling with. Also, you can then take that to your school district and if they still choose to ignore your son's situation, you can file a complaint with the district. This is ridiculous. I know teachers are busy, but they should be making every effort to reach every student, with the help of the administration.
Oh, do I know where you are coming from, and what frustrations you are experiencing. First of all, make a request to the school in writing to have your son tested. I can't remember how long they have to compete the testing,(I think 45 school days) but they do have a time limit. Then they have the same length of time to assemble the results and go over them with you. From my experience, the testing that the schools do is more of a screening than for actual diagnosis. Our school found nothing wrong with our daughter and I took her to Children's Hospital Learning Services and they found a number of things wrong and that is how we got her on a 504. A 504 does put the accommodations in writing (what the vice principal told you) that the teacher/school has to follow. It is however a legally binding document and will follow your child into college if necessary. It is updated and reviewed every year, and you are a part of the team that writes the accommodations. If you don't like something that the school wants to include, say so and they can't include it and if you want something included that they aren't going to include, insist that it be included. (we insisted that our daughter not be graded on spelling in anything but spelling because it was testing her spelling and not her knowledge of the subject) It doesn't give your child an advantage over the other students, but levels the playing field. (seating arrangements, study guides, oral testing...all individualized for your child) Here is a website that I recommend to everyone who suspects their child has a LD. greatschools.net Use their search engine and research 504's, LD's etc. and the site will be able to help. What the school is doing is undermining his self esteem and this is exactly what he doesn't need. We ended up taking our daughter to LearningRx for cognitive rehabilitation. She is dyslexic, has slow processing speed and low phoenimic awareness. It was expensive but very worth the time involved and the expense. If you don't have any success with the school, go above them and go to the district and even the State Education Board. His counselor may also be qualified to do more difinitive testing and be able to help you advocate for your child. If you need to consider changing schools. That is what we did because we had a teacher who refused to follow the 504 and an administration that wouldn't make her do her job. Our new school has bent over backwards to help our daughter be successful in the classroom. She is making all A's and B's and I'm not teaching her for 3 hours every night (what she wasn't getting at school) and she is doing it all on her own. We did end up having her repeat 5th grade when whe changed schools...the best thing that we could have done. She was always one of the youngest before and now is one of the older kids and the extra year of maturity really helped her. Her self confidence has greatly improved and she is finally thriving in her learning environment. I tried for 3 years to get the school to recognize that our daughter had a LD and they either wouldn't listen, recognize it, or their tests didn't reveal it. Don't give up, you know your child better than the so called "education experts" and you are his best advocate. Janet
PS He doesn't need any more humiliation from his classmates/teacher/school, let him stay home on Friday.
Hi Jami,
Wow! I feel for you. I think you have a right to be angry and upset. I would not give up. Try talking to the principal instead of the VP and don't give up. You need to find out what is going on with your child. I don't know where you live, however in Colorado there is an organization called, Child Find that works with parents to help them identify learning disabilities and such. I have friends who have gone through them with great success. Even if your state doesn't offer it, maybe you can contact their website and they can point you in the right direction. I don't buy what the school is saying that just because he is getting good grades that he is fine. There is such a wide spectrum of learning disabilities and it could just be something very minor. Good Luck!
Check out this website for the best idea on IEP and 504 laws.
http://www.wrightslaw.com/
The VP is somewhat correct in some of his answers. IEP are legally mandated and 504 are more like agreements between a teacher and parent. That does not mean your sould not have one. 504 give a teacher "rules and exceptions" for adaptaions in the classroom. Adhd is a reason to have a 504.
There is a law called the "Child Find Mandate". It states that schools are required to find a child and test them within a certain time limit. Go to your local State's Board of Education and find out the time limit. While you are there google 504. Our state mandates there be 2 504 specialist in the school. One is usually the school nurse. Find out who they are and go directly to them. If they do not listen show up at your next school board meeting with the law in hand and do not stop talking to whom ever you can. Sometimes you will find that one person that will fight with you.
http://www.wrightslaw.com/info/child.find.mandate.htm
As far as the reading this is what we do. My son is still struggling at reading in the 4th grade. He is on an IEP. I think I could fight the point thing, but I do not. Since there is no way he would get all his points by reading himself, I read the books to him. Trust me it is hard to get the time in, but we do it. I have found you can get through a Magic Treehouse book in two days of reading for 30 minutes. You should only have to do this a few time per month. Sometimes I feel bad that it takes time where I could read other longer books to him, but I know I just need to do it.
I feel it is better to adapt in what you can. The teachers see it as you willing to work with them and it makes communitcation easier. With that, is there a way to go to the school and pick up the packet yourself every Monday. You could then rip it into smaller sections before he sees it?
Being a parent of non typical kids is harder than anyone can imagine. The time we put into things is crazy. Keep fighting for him.
There is way more to say, so if you have any questions feel free to e-mail. I have lived this with 2 of my boys.
Tama
mom to 4
Hi Jami,
It can be a long and frustrating road but hang in there. After about 6 months my daughter finally has her IEP in place and it's made a huge difference. Grades are not indicative of a learning disability. There are many very bright kiddos who compensate and get average grades, just like there are many kiddos who struggle and barely pass. Have you spoken with your pediatrician? Children's Hospital offers diagnostic testing. Other agencies might offer testing as well depending on where you live. Check with your insurance company too as to what they'll cover. Also, make a written request (cc counselor, teacher, principal, school's and district's learning specialist, and superintendent) for testing through the school. That way everyone is on board and aware of the situation. Be aware Children's may offer different tests with possibly different results than what the school will offer. Children's may be the way to go since their testing is usually more comprehensive. Once you have the results, then work to get either an IEP or 504 in place. (Usually a school is reluctant to put a kiddo on an IEP unless they have not met their academic goals two years in a row.) In the meantime, since your son's teacher is sending home packets - just take one assignment at a time and break that down to specific tasks within each assignment. Offer rewards and encouragement for each task completed within each assignment. Try smaller increments of study too. It will probably help to have 3 twenty-minute study sessions rather than one long hour session. Good luck!
Jami,
You are not alone! I am in the process of divorcing my husband of 17 years. I too have two boys who are ADHD so I completely understand what you are going through! I am not sure how to handle the "school thing" but I wanted you to know that youare not alone and if you ever need anyone to talk to I am here for you. I have four kiddos ages 16,15,12, and 8. My 15 and 12 y/o are the ones with ADHD so I have "been there done that"!
Good Luck!
Cheryl
This happened to us as well. Fortunately I was in the position to pull my son from school and homeschool him. Since you are not I would immediately contact the superintendant of schools and tell him what is happening. If that doesn't work after a week go directly to the State Board of Education. There is a certain number of days the school has to accomodate your request even if they don't think they should. It turns out that our school district is just too overwhelmed with special needs students and so any borderline kid was being set aside as just lazy or sruggling. I fought it and 3 years later it is much improved. Even though I homeschooled an investigation was done and the principal of the school I had been dealing with was fired. I still won't put my kids in our local school district and go out of my way to drive them 20 miles one way to a charter school where my son's are doing very well. We are lucky a new charter school is opening in our district next year and both got in so no more driving but it's been worth it. If you look in our area it says something about our local schools. There are 5 charter schools in our district alone and our local district is not happy, insisting that we can't support that many. Even the much larger district right down the road doesn't have that many. The new school filled in 2 weeks and 3 of the other schools have waiting lists of over 300. Good luck to you because it sounds like you are doing the best for your son. Don't be afraid to push what you want and educate yourself on your rights.
Omg Jami.
I cannot believe this situation. Hang in there.
First, if you want a 504 or IEP (individual education plan), the vp has no right to deny that. Furthermore, concerning getting him a psycholgical evaluation, ditto! I did these things for a living and your situation is appaling. Since the VP is not being helpful, I'd recommend talking to the school psychologist directly since they are the one who would test and create the 504/IEP. I had plenty of students with straight A's and learning disabilities, so it is clear that this VP doesn't know what he's talking about.
Second, concerning Eragon, I think supporting in his decision is great. It's unfortunate that this school choses to punish those in this manner.
If he's a slow reader and not progressing, plus the homework packet being overwhelming, those are clear signs to mr and the reason why 504 were created, to enforce such things as separating out the packets and allow extra time on assignments of length.
If I was you I would take my son to be tested on my own. Actually I did that with my son a couple weeks ago. He gets good grades but really struggled with math. It would take him 2 hours to do 10 math problems. I called my pediatrician and asked them about having him tested and they sent questionaires to the teachers and for me and my husband to fill out then we spent about 2 hours with 2 drs while they talked to him and did some testing on him. They are not detecting ADD like I thought he might have but they are saying he needs extra help in math. You will have to see what your insurance covers but that is what I did. With the AR I agree with you that it is not fair for them to push your son to read small books quickly if he finds something he likes. We had that problem with our son last year he never met the AR goal. He only had like 19 points all year in 2nd grade. This year his teacher is pushing all of the kids to read what they like and gives them lots of time during school to read also. Last year we had to make my son sit and read for an hour and that was like pulling teeth! This year I will come home from work, the tv is on but he is READING! That is a very big thing for him, and he already had 69 points for the year. I am very happy with what the teacher is doing to encourage the kids to read more. Maybe you can try to make it more fun to read, set up his own corner with pillows and lots of lights and a quiet spot so he can concentrate. GL email me if you have any questions. [email protected]