I have a nine year old daughter that has major attitude! She rolls her eyes, sighs, talks back, and has the need to always have somthing negative to say. She is also mean to her 7 year old sister. We have a very close extended family and she does this to no one else in the family except me & her uncle, very rarely to her father. Usually whenever her Dad is home, she's good. I have discussed her behavior with her but it doesn't help. She's been punished but nothing changes. She is well behaved when she's at school, family's house, in public, but at home she's completely different. PLEASE HELP!
A lot of this is a stage she's going through...however, it's just like any other act of disobedience. It's disrespectful, and kids need to be taught that how thing think is as important as how they act. She'll probably say, "but I didn't SAY anything!"..and that's true, but her attitude needs to punished just as her actions would.
Probably it's aimed at you because Moms do the majority of the discipline and it's "a drag". Also, treating siblings badly is also not allowed in our house....so there is punishment for that just like if she'd done something else wrong.
Bad attitudes are sometimes harder because you have to constantly stay on it...sometimes for months, years! But, I've always tried to emphasize with my girls that the attitude is important, too. Even if they don't "feel" like doing whatever you tell them, they still need to keep their attitude in check.
Hope this helps.
Gees... I have an 8 1/2, 7 and 4 year old so I can relate. I have no advice because I am embarking on some of the same issues. If you happen to come up with something that works clue me in.
GOOD LUCK!!!