Will You Help Me with My Two Year Old's Birthday Party?

I agree with most of the posters. There is no need for anything more than a family party with cake and icecream. I have a 6yo and an almost 5yo. I decided to wait on the friends parties until they ask. My daughter has not asked and my son has mentioned it. We'll see in a month or two if he is still interested. I know that growing up we always had a family party and a seperate friends party.

Here's what we did:

-pick a theme for the cake and decor.
-invite family and/or a couple of her little friends.
-don't plan any games. Let everyone hang out, visit and eat. The kids that are there will be fine just playing together.

There's no need to go huge on her 2nd birthday. She will love whatever you do, and there will be plenty of yrs to come for big blowouts =)

And if you want the party to go from 10-11:30 (or whenever), YES it is OK to put a time frame on the invite.

A.,

This is one area where I refuse to follow the crowd and so glad I do. Parents in our generation completely overdue birthday parties, which end up being a nightmare for the parents and leading to entitled kids.

A few tips...

- Invite the same number of children as the age of your child, maybe 1-2 more. So that means invite 2-4 children. Invite their parents at this age. When they get to be about 5, you can let the parents drop them off. But not at age 2. Moms will be very understanding and willing to help, so delegate to them.

- Definitely set a time frame and make it short - 1 to 1 1/2 hours is perfect. There is nothing wrong with putting that on the invitation. If you let it linger for hours and it cuts into nap time, there will be meltdowns.

- Don't do games. That is appropriate for school aged children. With two year olds, it will just make them cry. Let them play with toys, blown up or helium balloons, blow bubbles (a bubble blower might be a good investment so you don't get light headed.) Give them ribbons and music to do creative movement dance with. Maybe have crayons and paper or play do. Think of what your daughter likes to do and do it.

- Cake and ice cream is enough. Cupcakes are also a good alternative. When our kids were really little, we invited a couple families over for a BBQ and that was fun, too. Use paper products so you don't have tons of dishes to do. Maybe practice blowing out candles with your daughter so she knows what to do at the party.

- If you have your daughter open gifts at the party, prep her ahead of time for what will happen. Just have her unwrap the gifts and put them away still in the box. If you start trying to take things out of the boxes, set them up, put them together, put batteries in them, etc. you are going to have a mess. Things will be lost, kids will fight over the toys, the kids who brought the gifts will want it back, etc. You may want to have her open the gifts with the adults watching while the other kids do another fun activity.

- Use self restraint and think for the future. It is so hard with your first party of your first child to go all out. But you set a precedence. Every year (especially as they get old enough to remember) has to be a little bigger and better. More kids, more presents, more activities. It has become almost expected in our society to drop several hundred dollars to rent inflatables, take the kids to the skating rink, Chuck E. Cheese, rent out the movie theatre, etc. No child "needs" all that. They need people who love them to set aside a day every year to celebrate and say "we are so glad you came into this world and that we are lucky enough to know and love you." That doesn't take a lot of money or a big show.

Good luck. I hope you have a wonderful party.

S.

I have daycare in my home, so I just do a simple party with balloons and cake for all the kids birthdays including my own. My daughter has just had her first "real" birthday party for her 4th birthday. What I would recommend to you is to invite a few friends and/or family of yours that have a child around your child's age. The moms or dads will need to stay at that age so they should be people you want to see, because your 2 year old doesn't care who comes to the party.

For our daughters' 2nd (and 3rd) birthdays we only invited the grandparents (great grandparents) and sponsers. There is no need to have a large party with "friends" at this age. We are planning the same for when she turns 4 in March. We are not planning on doing a ton of "party" parties. Maybe when the kids turn 10 we'll let them do a bigger one with friends.... Birthdays are too "present focused" and we are trying to teach our kids that life is not all about getting a ton of presents..... I do understand that most people do throw kids parties though.

We just do a simple lunch with cake and presents. Our party usually starts at about 11 and is over by about 2 or 3 PM. She has always had fun with just relatives. And none of them have small kids.....

IF you are planning a party with friends. Make sure you note in the invite whether lunch will be served or if not make sure you put "cake and ice cream" party or something to that effect. A party ending at 11:30 really should feed lunch at 11. Otherwise kids will have cake and not be hungry for lunch when they get home.... Or you could do the party from 9 AM to 10:30 AM. Then parents would NOT expect lunch to be fed. Otherwise, have the party in the afternoon if you don't want to feed lunch.

Make homemade play-doh for the kids to play with. ALWAYS A HIT!!! And just use kitchen utensils and plastic silverware as "tools". Let me know if you need the recipe.

Or lay a big sheet on the floor and put a small pool in the center and fill it with rice or beans for the kids to play with. It can be their "sandbox". Give them pails and shovels (with their names written on them in permanent marker) and that can be their thank you gift for coming.

Have a bag of balloons blown up and let the kids play catch and hit them around. They don't hurt and can't really break anything.

At 2 you are not planning a party for the kids. At 2 they can't really do organized games. So, are you inviting just a couple of kids with each of their parents or are you just doing a family party with a mix of kids and adults? If you have a small house go for less people (for instance - we have a mid sized house with a big backyard so we have a big outdoor party in summer).

Once you have decided who to invite (if you invite her "friends" invite the parents too - unless you only having 1 or 2 friends).

If you want to keep it very short then just have some playtime, a snack and sing happy birthday. Let her open her presents and give everyone a little favor bag to match her theme.

If you are inviting lots of people you can feel free to try something like "your prescence is our gift" but you will still get people who bring gifts. I have done this for 3 years and last year NOBODY listened to me. So next year I am not even going to bother. I feel kind of bad because we use it as our big summer party so we invite a lot of people. We provide dinner for parents and kids.

Send out invites about 3 weeks before the party. Try to pick a theme -even if it just a color - and base things on that. It helps narrow down what you will do (cake, color, decorations, favors). If you don't want to spend a lot of money keep this simple. A cute cake, some juice and icecream. You can buy colored plates and napkins to add to decor and it is cheaper than buying themed plates (like Disney princess for instance).

If you invite parents too you might want to have some munchies for them and soda or something for them to drink. Also, if you don't want to provide a meal, don't do it around meal time. For instance, do it from 10-11:30. Afternoon generally gets into nap time for that age. So your times that don't include a meal are limited. You could also put "join us for cake and icecream" to let people know there will be no meal. Nothing worse than hungry 2 year olds!

Feel free to email me specific questions. I have been an event planner since 1997 and I am actually doing a class on kids birthday parties for a moms group in March. I love planning my kids birthday parties! Good luck!

When my daughter turned 2 we had only family parties. The other parties didn't start until she went to school at the age of 4. We also live in a small apartment but somehow we made it. We have theme party every year. That year we did Barney. We served ham and rolls with potato salad and then cake and ice cream. No games. Just keep it small and simple. Your daughter will have plenty of years ahead of her to celebrate big. Stating a spicific time is the best because of rest time and having it in the AM vs. PM is a good idea because then the child will be relaxed and have fun. We always had it in the PM but then sometimes she feel asleep also. Whatever you decide have fun and take lots of pictures.

Don't worry about games. Everything is a game to a two-year old. A couple of medium size cardboard boxes can entertain for a LONG time. If no is latex allergic, half a dozen balloons also amuse for hours. (Popped balloons are a choking hazard, so supervise closely.)

Cake and ice cream is perfect. If you want to get fancy, buy a decorated cake or make and decorate your own.

Setting a specific length of time is a great idea- and 1 1/2 hours is about right.

We have a lot of family in town, so we invited them all and had our party in the basement of Hardees, where they have a simple ball-pit for the kids to play in. (McDonalds Playland or similar are fun if you have one near you. We don't.)

A good rule of thumb for number of children to invite is the number of your child's age, minus one. For my son's 2nd b-day we had my son and his cousin. That was it for kids.

This year, when my son turns three, we will have my son, his cousin, and one of his friends.

If you want to specify no presents, you can do that on your invitation, or ask for items to donate to a local animal shelter- towels, blankets, treats, cat toys etc. Your child can have fun opening them and them have fun doling them out at the shelter later.

Don't let the party become a big stress for you!

P.S. If you have the party at a fast-food chain with a ball-pit, you can make a simple cake and top it with m'n'm candies to simulate the ball pit. That's what i did last year.

Last year at my neices party (she was turning 1, but most of the cousing were around 2). She didn't have any games. All she had was a few coloring books and crayons laid out for the kids to color when they felt like it. I think that, plus cake and icecream is enough to keep them occupied for 1 1/2 to 2 hours. At that age, they don't need much to keep them busy. The fact that they are going to be at somebody else house (which means different toys to play with) will help too.

About the invitations. You can put a specific time period. I would do it after lunch or midafternoon. Like 1:00-2:30 or 3:00-4:50 or whatever works best for your little ones nap time. If you do it right after lunch then just cake and ice cream will be good. If you do it before lunch people might not eat before lunch or they might expect lunch! Since she is only two I wouldn't do games. When we did my daughters second birthday everyone was content with cake, ice cream, socializing and watching her open presents. I hope this helps!

At age 2 most kids are not ready for a big "birthday party". They usually get really fussy and confused. I would have a small family only get together with just cake/ice cream or whatever you normally have as a celebration treat. You will have plenty of years to have the big celebration type parties. When my kids where that little it was a family only affair usually with dinner and then a small celebration afterwards. Hope this helps

Hi A.,

I just want to pipe in about the gift thing.... My son just had his first Christmas and his first birthday, and we got WAY too many gifts. I ended up giving 3 grocery bags full of new stuff to charity. We don't have the room for everything he got, and that many toys will just collect dust, anyway. It might as well go to someone who needs it and will use it.

I don't think it is at all rude to say on the invitations something like, "Your presence is your gift. If you would like to bring a toy, we will be donating to XYZ Charity". You could also suggest than in lieu of a gift, people bring a foodshelf donation or pet food for an animal shelter.

Hi there. I have a 3 1/2 year old and a 5 1/2 year old. I think for a 2 year old's party, you should definitely think small. If you have a smaller house you could just invite a few of her little girl friends. And it's totally reasonable to put a time limit on it.

I would just have them play for a while then have cake and ice cream. For my 3 year old's party we did a princess party. The little girls dressed up in their favorite princess dress. They loved it.

At that age the parents will probably stay for the party too, so think about that. For older kids you would have a craft, but for this age I wouldn't even bother. If you do want to do something, maybe something involving stickers or coloring a picture or something easy like that. We did foam tiaras and they put foam stickers on them.

Hope this helps and doesn't stress you out more! : )

I have learned the hard way to KEEP IT SIMPLE. Two-year-old don't have a lot of attention span for games. They are happy to just play with toys. If the party has a theme, you can have coloring pages printed out, or have them do a simple craft or activity to go along with the theme (i.e. If the theme is princesses, decorate a princess crown with stickers and markers, or get some princess foamies to stick on paper). You could also put on some fun music and let them dance.
Cupcakes are great for little hands, and super easy to make yourself.
You don't have to do a lot of decorating. The kids won't notice. We just did helium balloons for my oldest son's 2nd birthday party and the kids loved being to take one home with them.
Absolutely put a time frame on the invitations. Also specify if you want the parents to stay.
Only invite kids your daughter likes playing with. Don't worry about offending anyone. You don't have to bend over backwards to please everyone for your child's birthday. Think about what your daughter would like, and go with that.
IF you want to do gift bags or party favors, think like a 2-year-old. Play dough and bubbles are always a hit. Crayons with a coloring book are fun. Again, keep it simple. Check out the dollar store for good deals.
Have fun with it!!! =)

I have always put a time limit on invitations for my kids parties. You can always ask people to stay longer if things are going well. It's more difficult to kick them out gracefully.

We also wrote, "No gifts please" on our invitations when the kids were too young to notice since we were already over run with toys. Most people ignored it anyway though.

Two year olds won't do much game playing anyway. Put out some toys and maybe some crayons.

Have fun!

Here's what I did that saved me from the insanity of birthday parties that keep having to be bigger and better: I followed the rule that the child can invite as many guests as she is years old. Both kids had two friends over for their two year old parties, three for when they turned three, etc. My limit is ten, so my 11 year old invited ten to his last party.

You can tell people that's how you're doing it, and they'll understand. I never felt pressure to invite the whole class.

Two year olds are so little; she'll be delighted with a fun, mellow party with two of her friends. And you'll be much happier.

I agree with some of the responses. I have two kids and my youngest is turning 2 next month and my oldest is turning 5 in June. I've always done family only for their parties, with the exception of 1st birthday which included extended family. But I usually do a meal, such as something in the crockpot, snacks and cake and ice cream. If you just want a small party you can definitely write 10-11:30 and just put on there that it's for cake and ice cream so people know it's just a small get together. As for games, when they're that young they're content with just playing. My kids have two cousins that come and every party they all just run off and play. Happy birthday to your daughter.

My girls love playing house. My daughter's birthday is later this month and this year we are going to have a "Let's play house" party. Each girl is asked to bring a babydoll to the party. Then I will put out the doll toys (blankets, bottles, diapers, highchair, etc.) and let the girls play. I have found that when I do lots of games they would rather just be playing toys in their room. Don't get stressed. Keep it small. To avoid having to mail out thank you's later I make thank you's and hand them out when the guest leaves. They usually just say thank you for being a good friend. Have your daughter color on them and that will make it personal.

I am agreeing with the other posters...keep it simple!! Less than 2 hours, 1-2 friends, and no games...just some activities (playdough, toys, coloring) to keep them occupied. I would think about the time of day when your daughter is at "her best"...do not have the party ending close to nap or bedtime b/c it is likely she will "crash" with the excitement of her birthday. Just have fun!!!!!!!

I recently went to a bday party for a two year old. There were about 30 adults and 15 children. It was all very overwhelming for him and he spent most of the time hiding! I agree that a small,short party would be best. My daughter turns 2 next week and I stressed about having a party. After I went to that party I felt alot better about my decsion to just have family. I will still decorate and make it a special day for her! Just have fun!

We have always had large birthday parties for our daughter without too much fuss and no melt downs. Keep it short, sweet and don't expect too much.

For her first bday we had a rubber ducky theme, dd loves ducks. We played a few simple games where everyone won, pin the bubble on the ducky and a coloring page. We ate cake/ice cream and opened gifts. I bought inexpensive rubber ducks at walmart (50 cents each) as party favors and sent them home with the kids that attended.

For her 2nd bday it was a Dora the Explorer Party. We used the community room at our church (for free). I made "pack packs" out of small purple lunch sacks and glued faces on them, then made a "map" on the computer then put in some inexpensive favors to help us on our Dora adventure. Just like in the Dora stories....We needed to find the pinata and map told us how to get there, go thru the bubble garden (we blew bubbles and danced), cross the troll bridge on rubber ducky lake (walk across brown craft paper laid on a blue comforter) and find the pinata. I played a cd of dora music the whole time and all the kids had a great time. Then of course we had cake and iice cream. (we opened the presents at home later)

In march dd will be 3 and we are having a princess ball. We will have the kids decorate a craft crown to wear and then have dancing and cake/ice cream. I am aking the kids too wear royal attire (dresses) or cotumes and have asked that no one bring presents, just come and celebrate.

Pick a theme or color your dd likes and go from there. I love orientaltrading.com for party supplies and www.coolest-kid-birthday-parties.com for ideas. The object is to have fun not stress.