Why Won't This Guy Look at the Camera??

Updated on January 17, 2012
W.R. asks from Blacksburg, VA
16 answers

So, I was looking at Christmas pictures. My SIL's boyfriend is NEVER looking in the camera. He is not trying to hide - generally facing the camera - but either his eyes are to the side or his face is turned away slightly. And he's not just trying to show his "good side" because he turns different ways in different photos. We have issues with him - he was unemployed when he met my SIL and moved in pretty much immediately. She makes lots of money and spends tons on him, and it seems he is totally in control of the relationship. Completely weird because she used to be a strong (almost to the point of being aggressive/unpleasant) woman. Anyway, I know no one can "figure him out" based on all of this but I just thought it would be fun to hear what people had to say!!

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So What Happened?

As I said, I asked this question because I thought it would be fun. Thanks to those who answered in that vein, or who provided useful info (I had no idea that flashes were so painful to some eyes). But to those of you who got all up in arms over this - lighten up!! Wow!!

More Answers

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M.T.

answers from Nashville on

Have you ever had a chance to look him straight in his eyes in person. The eyes are the window to one's soul. It speaks alot about what is going on inside.

4 moms found this helpful
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K.R.

answers from Houston on

It's funny - my MIL does the exact same thing. She isn't facing forward in one picture in 25 years of me being with her son! I very gently asked her why and she couldn't answer, just saying she didn't like the way she looked in pictures. Good enough for me, she just looks uncomfortable. Just chalk it up to that and don't take it too seriously.

4 moms found this helpful

J.W.

answers from St. Louis on

It sounds like you don't like him and are over analyzing the pictures. Some people just take bad pictures, doesn't really mean anything.

2 moms found this helpful
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A.V.

answers from Washington DC on

Either he doesn't like the camera (my uncle hates it) or he knows you don't like him and he feels uncomfortable being photographed by the family. Does he turn toward a door or away from certain people/toward SIL?

2 moms found this helpful
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☆.A.

answers from Pittsburgh on

I'm going to go with......O. of America's most Wanted maybe? LOL
Who knows? Some people just take crappy pictures.

2 moms found this helpful

C.W.

answers from Lynchburg on

Hi mom!

I guess my 'first' 'sort of'...joking thought was maybe he has a 'facing forward' picture hanging in the post office??

Maybe not so funny...

But was my first thought...

Best Luck!
michele/cat

2 moms found this helpful

L.A.

answers from Austin on

When a person speaks to him or he speaks to people does he look them in the eye?

If not he could be slightly Autistic.

Some people do not look at a lens of a camera because it makes them blink.. Some have learned that with a flash, their eyes always turn red.
Does he have light colored eyes?

2 moms found this helpful

A.S.

answers from Iowa City on

I avoid looking directly at the camera because my eyes are extremely sensitive to light and I never know if the photographer is using flash or not. I don't want to be blind for 45 minutes just so cousin Lou can get a 'good' picture. Maybe he has sensitive eyes. Maybe he is shy and/or uncomfortable around you and your family?

1 mom found this helpful
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T.B.

answers from Washington DC on

Does he wear glasses? Only asking because I've had lasik to fix my vision several years ago. Since the surgery my eyes are VERY sensitive to bright light. It's not painful but not comfortable either. Perhaps he may have the same issue....or he just doesn't like having his picture taken...or maybe he's one of america's most wanted...lol.

1 mom found this helpful
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S.H.

answers from Richmond on

Witness protection program is my bet! LOL

1 mom found this helpful
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N.B.

answers from Washington DC on

Native American Indians and a few other cultures believe that looking into a camera steals ones' soul.

With the behaviors you have described, he is hiding something. He does not want anyone to see his true nature by capturing it on film. People like this avoid eye contact unless it serves their purpose.

I suggest you ALL read this article I came upon researching for a class paper: http://cassiopaea.com/cassiopaea/psychopath_2.htm

Would have saved me a lot of grief the last 5 years had I had access to it.

Nanc

1 mom found this helpful
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C.S.

answers from Las Vegas on

Comfort level. There already seems to be some issues with the (family) relationship and now he is in a family gathering with people he is uncomfortable around. My guess he is there and taking pictures for her.

1 mom found this helpful
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R.M.

answers from Cumberland on

Actually he is trying to hide

1 mom found this helpful

C.O.

answers from Washington DC on

I would be asking myself WHY am I letting this get to me? It sounds like you don't like him and are finding ANYTHING to nit-pick at him...man...this is like the second "gossip" question today..

Have you talked to him?
Tried to get to know him?
Does he look at you in the eye when you talk with him?

On the nefarious side - maybe he has something to hide...maybe his picture is on a milk carton or a wanted poster in the post office.... :)

Seriously - if he's not beating her - and if she has changed for the better - not so aggressive and she's happy - what does it matter why he doesn't look at the camera?

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D.B.

answers from Charlotte on

You sure do seem to be getting picked on here. Maybe it's because you paired the relationship with your SIL's boyfriend with the picture issue.

Are you having fun yet?

Sorry this is happening...
:(

D.S.

answers from Norfolk on

Hi, Mom:

So what do you need?
Just want to know.
D.

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