What's Your Opinions About This?

If this is a real post, and he has never acted like this before, I suggest he go and see his doctor. He needs to explain this change in his emotions and thoughts.

Could be a serious health issue.

If he comes out with a clean bill of health he needs to have a mental evaluation.

This is serious issue. Make him go this next week and start documenting his behavior. Keep the notes away from him, so he will not realize you are observing him.

Just tell him you love him and you are concerned that he does not seem to be himself. And quit asking hi so many questions, If he is depressed, questions will make him angry and defensive because he has no control and his thoughts are racing all of the time.

Welcome to mamapedia!!

This is the first man in your life? Where was your dad?

He stays with you because he can control you with his words. You are starting to believe his words and he knows it. Next? he'll hit you once. And he will apologize and say it will never happen again. You'll believe him and then he'll do it again and blame you for it. it will be your fault - you MADE him do it.

No. You did NOT make him do it. HE is in control of his feelings and body. NOT YOU.

What is going on? I don't know. Maybe he hit his head and it caused a serious problem.

What's my opinion? You need to broom his butt to the curb. NOW. TODAY. If you can't do it today - start making plans to be able to take care of yourself on your own and not have him in your life.

Next - you MUST get counseling. For you AND your son. It is UNACCEPTABLE for a child to hit his parent. TOTALLY UNACCEPTABLE. You should NOT allow this. When he does hit you? he's is following in his father's footsteps. WRONG ANSWER!!

When you son hits you? You grab his hands and tell him this NOT acceptable. PERIOD. We use our WORDS NOT OUR HANDS. Then put him in time out. IF he goes to pre-school - go to the director of his pre-school and ask him/her if there are any problems with him in class? If so - seek help for him. NOW. Call your pediatrician and tell him/her what is going on and ask for a referral to a mental health professional.

If you are working? buy nanny cams and put them in the kitchen and living room - where the fights take place - this will give backing to your story.

Next - STOP TRYING to fight with him. it won't change anything. And being submissive? Got you nowhere, right? So you need to stand up for yourself and KNOW you are NOT the crazy one.

Get help - TODAY!!!

Wow. OK he's got you so well trained that you're questioning your own sanity. Plain and simple - you are in an abusive relationship, and you need to get out. He does these things because he has mental health issues and is an abuser. If you don't know what the domestic violence resources in your community are, call 1-800-799-7233 or, from a SAFE computer (one that he can't log on to) go to thehotline.org. Because you work, you might want to do this when you're in your office (privately, of course) to ensure that he's not listening or watching your computer.

Fighting like this isn't normal or healthy, what he says to you and your child isn't normal or healthy, and laying his hands on you is never, ever acceptable behavior. Sorry but he doesn't love you. People who love you don't treat you like this.

Please, connect with someone who can help you to get out of this safely. I wish you strength and luck.

It's not uncommon for mental illness to happen suddenly in the 20's and even into the early 30's. You need to talk to your family doc about this.

He's abusing you and setting your child up to be an abusive spouse. If you don't do something now it's only going to get worse.

It's like a lobster who is put into a nice cool pan of water. It swims around having fun. As the water heats up the lobster thinks "'ahhhh, a nice warm bath". Then one moment the lobster is saying "Ouch, this is a bit hot and the next the lobster is dead because the water is boiling".

Don't be a lobster and allow yourself to get desensitized to what's going on around you. He's abusing you. If you can set your phone on record or set it where it will make a video that's longer than a couple of minutes.

To catch my daughter acting crazy we got a small camera that we hid on the TV. It sent what it taped to our hard drive.

All you have to do is show proof he's like this an no judge will ever say you're unfit, unless you are.

If you truly are not keeping the house clean, not cooking, etc....then maybe you need to consider making some personal changes.

The reason I add that part is this. My dearest best friend is a pig. She lives with trash on her floors, dirty dishes all over the house, laundry growing mildew in the halls and bedrooms and laundry room, when you go to her house you have to push books and toys and dirty clothes off the furniture to find a seat.

Her husband left her, showed the court pictures of the house, and he got custody of the kids. She still lives badly but she learned to clean up. It also helps not having her pig kids around all the time too. They didn't even know what color carpet they had in their rooms. The dad had to get rid of nearly everything the kids owned because it was too small and gross.

Once he did that the kids had more manageable possessions and they kept their space better.

My point is this, if you are a slob when your husband comes home he's assailed with filth. He is reacting.

That DOES NOT IN ANY WAY allow him to treat you like this though. Even if you didn't do housework for months he has no right to talk to you or treat you this way.

I'm just saying sometimes we need to take stock of the situation. Do you keep a normal house? Then he's nuts! Do you have filth laying around being walked on? Then you need to learn some better organizational skill and tell him to shut the heck up.

Your husband is abusve. This is not how a relationship should be. Please look at this website and call this number to find help:
800-787-3224
http://www.thehotline.org/help/

www.youarenotcrazy.com

My opinion? If this is real, you need to leave today. Just as others have stated.

Find a safe house. Do not call from your home phone and do NOT use your cell phone if your husband has access to it. He could call all the numbers on your phone and find you.

Find a new job. Move your son to a new day care. Vanish.

If your husband has hit you? File a police report. DO NOT back down. I'm truly sorry you are going through this. I've been married over 25 years and can't imagine going through what you are going through.

I wish you luck in getting help and getting out.

S.

Please, take your child and leave this man today!

Do you have family you can move in with? A friend? Otherwise, I think you should go to a shelter.

Your husband is very abusive, and you cannot remain with him or allow your child to think that this is normal. This is NOT normal. If he hits you, you should call the cops.

The reason "why" is that your husband is a messed up jerk. He will not change easily. The only way you will get him to change is to take his kid and leave, AND EVEN IF YOU DO THAT there is a good change he will NOT change.

It's also very unhealthy for you to be yelling in front of your son. You need to leave.

more coffee please..ok, bottom line, your husband is probably seeing someone else..he comes in..he is "tired" and he is looking for something to complain about, he is also having mental problems, and is using your kid to hit you..all so he can say "i didnt hit her"..he is one fry short of a happy meal and you need to leave.he is recording you, but only recording you screaming at him, hes not recording him screaming at you..he is a mental case..leave him,wait until he leaves for work, take your kid , write down a false address of where you are going to thrown him off the scent, pick up all your important papers,any money you find laying around,a few changes of clothes for you and the tot and walk out the door..let him be someone elses problem..family, friends even a shelter sounds better then dealing with a mentally ill husband! K. h.

Please get some professional help for yourself. This is toxic behavior that will eventually destroy your heart, mind, and soul.

If this is real and since you seem to flux between English, American spelling and really bad spelling I have my doubts, but if....

It could be something as fixable as he is stressed out at work, they are cutting back, he is worried he will lose his job and y'all have nothing in savings. He is taking his fears/anger out on you because he doesn't see you as pulling the same weight as he is. He sees that as not caring about his stress because you are not angry too.

He could have a mental disorder, who knows.

The other thing that doesn't make sense in your post is one time he tells your son to hit you and now your son hits and bites you all the time? Kids don't work like that, especially when people are fighting. Most kids when adults fight around them want to get away, they go away. You are saying he not only hung around with you but then when told hit mom he just blindly did it. Nope, something like that would confirm their fear, they are being drug into this and they run.

Is this some psych homework you were supposed to do over the summer because from a psychological standpoint this screams what are they holding back that makes the story make sense.

I think you can guess what we're going to say....this behavior is unacceptable and you in charge of keeping your son away from this as much as possible.
Start squirreling away money, get credit cards in your own name and start quietly planning an exit strategy...

he sounds awful.
you don't sound much better.
if this is real, go to a counselor immediately. you are a pair of immature, selfish, violent humans who are wrecking your child's childhood.
khairete
S.

The question isn't why he stays with you.. but rather, why you stay with him... Unless you don't think you deserve better, than you will not have better... He sounds like a real ahole... He obviously has no self-confidence of his own, otherwise he wouldn't put you down.. I think it's time to consider getting into therapy (you needn't tell him) also.. I am concerned for your safety.. can you call a woman's help line for abused woman? I worry that your husband's behavior is escalating..... Clearly, by your posting this, you know things are bad. you deserve better... but the change must begin with you.. please get help ASAP... there are hotlines out there for abused women.. I really would like you to give them a call.. please keep us posted. you are in my prayers..

My husband was starting to get like this a few years ago but luckily he still had one foot in the door of sanity unlike your husband who's gone off the deep end already. Mine was going to therapy and trusted his therapist who recommended he see s psychiatrist and psychopharmacologist. He was put on anti-psychotics in addition to his anti-depressants. He turned 40 and pretty much had a nervous breakdown. He had always had depression but then he became violent and verbally abusive. I was worried for my safety and left. Luckily the therapist got him to get help and he did. Your husband does not sound likes he's still in the world of sanity though and asking him to get help might seriously put you in danger. Get out and go to a safe house. Theres nothing else to be done. He is abusing your son by telling him to hit you. Send yourself detailed emails when this stuff happens to document it or get an account on penzu.com

He needs mental help. Plus any woman telling a man he would never know how to make her happy is just wrong on your part.