What Should I Do to Get Her to Be Nicer?

I could be wrong, but this sounds kind of typical of a little girl. If your son doesn't seem to notice, I wouldn't sweat it too much. What does your friend say??

I would have your son offer her cookies or fruit that she likes.
Maybe she will appreciate the treat and play with him in gratitude. But I would not worry too much unless your son is feeling her negativity.

Hi A.!

Just remeber that girls do mature and grow faster than boys. I too have a son that will be in Feb. He does better around boys than girls. I don't let him watch much tv and when i do it's Disney. Even so he still does all the things that little boys do. He likes to rough house and play rough even with girls. I find that most times his female cousins don't want much to do with him. They would rather play house or with their dolls. I just think it's the difference between boys and girls. But maybe you could find something creative that they could so together like coloring, painting, or playdough. Those activities always seem to break the gender gamp and pull kids together.

I have one boy and one girl, and I all I can really tell you is that girls are very different than boys. She may just be a mean girl, that happens, or maybe she is just basking in the attention she gets from your son, and feels ignoring him is the best way to keep it coming. Try to have your son play things you think she would like, but get him to do it without her so she feels he can have fun without her. She may just get over her attitude if it isn’t bringing her attention – from your son or you. But at least with my kids it plays out like this – boys think the world revolves around the people and things they love, girls think the world revolves around them. I doubt at 3 she is actually being mean intentionally, probably just trying to get her way by means you are not used to.

Wow, that's tough. My son met his first real "friend" at 16 months and for at least a year, Christopher didnt like to really play with him. He would play for only a few minutes at a time then move to something else or come find me. His problem was being shy from not being around other children. It just took time. He always got excited about visiting his friend and never wanted to leave but he still was hesitant about playing. Now, the two are best friends. They are more like brothers than anything else and you know how siblings can be. MEAN! They are mean to each other and then turn around and hug and laugh 5 minutes later. I honestly think that its just something kids do sometimes and it just takes time to get over it.

It may just be the difference between boys and girls. Girls are usually more advanced in things like knowing letters and numbers at that age, while boys are just more about gross motor skills at that time. They just might not be on the same brain wave length right now. Eventually, they may play better together. Or they may never play better together if their personalities aren't a good match. That can be difficult. I do have some friends I love to hang out with, but our children just don't play well together. It can be annoying when they fight or my 6 year old girl just refuses to play with my friend's 6 year old boy. He wants to play Superman and she wants to just draw or play on the computer.

I think the others are right about three year olds, they really don't play together especially not in a give and take kind of way. They are still very egocentric, and this is totally normal. She probably doesn't think she's smarter and is snubbing him, that really is a very advanced thought process that most three year olds aren't capable of. Also if your son is really going all out to be "friends" with her then he may even be more advanced than her at least emotionally. Development isn't just knowing your abc's and even that doesn't mean much at that age. Einstein didn't even talk until he was three, and I'll bet he didn't know his abcs right away. I wouldn't push the issue and don't take it personally wait until they're 41/2 to 5 yrs to see more social play interaction.

Many times 3 year olds don't really 'play together' in the traditional sense that we think of as 'playing together'. Some 3 year olds are content to sit side by side with another 3 year old, while each child does his or her separate thing, each with a different toy. It's totally normal, and for many kids is satisfying. Even though they might not be 'formally socializing', there's still socializing going on.

It's possible that she just has either an independent or introverted personality, whereas your son seems to be very outgoing and extroverted. Parents of more than one sibling can certainly attest that, while each child was raised similarly, sometimes it seems like the children could not be more opposite than each other where personality is concerned.

Unless she is being physically aggressive or using language that is hurtful to your son (name calling, belittling, etc.) I honestly wouldn't worry much about it. She could very much be enjoying his company, without expressing it whatsoever.