Weaning Older Baby

Updated on March 20, 2009
J.E. asks from Atco, NJ
20 answers

Okay he is actually a toddler I guess.He is 18 months old and extremely attached to breastfeeding.My ped doesn't see a problem unless it bothers me but I was hoping he would just wean himself not gonna happn.My ? is did anybody ever wean an older baby.I actually breats fed my daughter until she was alittle over 2 and compared to my son she was a breeze to wean.Should I just try going cold turkey.When my daughter was this age she only nursed before naps and bed but he would rather nurse than eat food and after the screaming I usually give in.Any advice would be helpful no comments about how long I have breast fed though I believe that is a personal choice.

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M.S.

answers from Philadelphia on

Hi J., I am also a long time Breast feeder. My son is 17 months and I weaned him about 1 month ago. We went down to one feeding a day for about 2 weeks before bed. Then one night I gave him a milk cup and he drank that like no problem. Then we had to wean that too but that's how I did it. He did cry for it, pull at my shirt, etc, but I had made up my mind and I had to stick to it. It is difficult but I also think that he was ready,too. Good luck!

S.Y.

answers from Pittsburgh on

Hi J.!
Good job for going this long!
My hubby was off work the week we weaned...it was a tremendous help. Lots of cuddles, lots of distration, and whatever you so....DON'T SIT DOWN! LOL This is actually the best advice I got...if you sit they will run over and "assume the position"..lol It took a little but she adjusted quite nicely, and I never once got engorged.
Good luck!

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J.B.

answers from Philadelphia on

I weaned my baby at 12 months and he did really well. I took the advice from another post on mamsource you can view it: http://www.mamasource.com/request/9226777369774129153. I took a look at all the responses and combined a bunch of the ideas and did what was best for me without crying it out. I just don't believe in that. good luck

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T.S.

answers from Philadelphia on

J.,

Congrats on the great nursing relationship! I planned to wean my son on his 2nd birthday. I thought he'd never give up nursing...as much as my daughter loved to nurse, my son seemed to even more. Then he surprised and shocked me...he totally weaned himself 2 weeks before he turned 2! I wasn't ready for it, as I had it in my mind that it would be 2 weeks later!

I wouldn't go cold turkey. I would wean down the number of times a day, as another reader wrote you. I went to maorning, afternoon and night, then dropped one of those. I think my son stopped before I got down to just 1 per day, but I'm not sure.

Good luck!

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M.B.

answers from Philadelphia on

Don't have much advice, but wanted to say congrats on the length of the BF! :) That's awesome! I saw your blurb about no comments, but I figured some positive ones would be OK! :) I would hope no one would be negative. I am jealous you are able to do it for so long! I weaned at 8mos because I had to go back to work and didn't have the opportunity to pump as often as needed. So good luck and congrats again!!

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D.T.

answers from Philadelphia on

If your daughter was two and easy to wean then I wouldn't think it would be a problem waiting until then to wean your son. Maybe offering him solid food before he gets to the point of wanting to nurse would help cut down on the amount of nursing.
Hope this helps.

A.J.

answers from Williamsport on

Your method is up to you, gradual or cold turkey, you've done an awesome job nursing so long. If you're saying you give in to nursing in response to screaming, cold turkey may not be for you, because he will scream.
Cut out a couple of feedings per day and replace with regular milk or food. Or one for a day or two, then two for a day or two...until you're only nursing before naps and bed.
Replace the nap feeding with a bottle, walk away when he screams, but keep the night nursing. After that, cut the night one. Let him scream.
The screaming is unavoidable. Decide if you want it gradual and drawn out, or all at once for a few brutal days to a week. Choose and stick by your choice. Clear your conscious knowing this is the trade off for having done something so great for his health. Every bonus has a sacrifice! He'll adjust, good luck!

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D.W.

answers from Allentown on

Hi! I just weaned my daughter at 19 mos, and we just slowly tapered it off... For her, the worst time was at night, b/c she still was a inconsistent about sleeping through the night. I took it week by week and cut out 1-2 feedings a week, until finally they were all gone. She fussed, but adjusted in about a week, although she was more like your daughter, and just did it before naps and bed...good luck! What about replacing it with a snack or sippy cup?

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N.H.

answers from Harrisburg on

I think it's great how long you've breastfed! There was a similar question in the past couple of weeks - maybe you could find it.

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T.S.

answers from Philadelphia on

You're not alone. I have nursed my son til almostg 3 1/2 years old. In the end it was only at bedtime and night or sometimes in early morning too. On Feb 23 I went out of town for two nights and Grandma stayed at the house with him and his 6 year old sister who easily self weaned just after 1. It is March 19 and he still asks EVERY day but I haven't given in and oddly, I still have milk. It's a tough call. Follow your heart. Good luck.

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L.H.

answers from Reading on

Hi,

I think the only way for you to wean him naturally is to have him get more calories in during the day. I understand that he prefers nursing over eating that's more of the dilemma. Would it work to say eat this, and at that age a balanced meal is only 1-2 T of protein, carbs, not a whole lot. Perhaps putting it on a larger plate so it even looks like less food, and say eat this and then you can bf. It might take some convincing but it may eventually work it's way out. I had a friend her daughter nursed until she was 4. But don't sweat it, he's got 6 months to go in comparison to your daughter. As you know a lot changes in 6 months! Just a thought though as to your dilemma I hope it helps. Have a wonderful day.

L.

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S.K.

answers from Philadelphia on

I weaned my son completely weened at 3 weeks after his second birthday. My husband helped out because he actually was putting our son to bed since he was a baby. The bed time feeding was the first to go. I would rock my son at nap time and just lay him down. I guess he was too tired to fight not having the breast before nap times. I did make sure I put him down right after lunch and then again right after snack time so he had a fully tummy. The hardest one for my son to give up was his morning feeding. He finally weened from that with a little help from my husband. He would give our son chocolate milk first thing in the morning. It took a few days but he finally didn't want to breast feed anymore. Chocolate milk won over...yeah!
Good luck! When he is ready he'll give it up...honest.

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B.D.

answers from Lancaster on

My son wanted the breast until he was almost three. At that time he still wanted it, but I was ready for him to be done! Although he usually only nursed at bedtime, he still was VERY demanding. He cried and fussed pretty good. What helped me was we took a family trip - so we were out of our routine and he handled himself better. By the time we got home he was a little more used to the idea - although I will admit even more than a month later he still was bugging me! Good luck!

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D.S.

answers from Pittsburgh on

Hi J.,

I am also still breastfeeding my daughter who is almost 19 months. She only breastfeeds in the morning and before bed (sometimes right after I get home from work). I am trying to stop the late afternoon feed and have been relatively successful thus far by distracting her, playing, and then giving her dinner. I am in the middle of doing it, so I can't give additional pointers, but with my daughter it seems that going slow has been the best approach. Does your son use a pacifier or take a bottle at other times? I am asking because my daughter did have a spike in wanting to nurse about 2-3 weeks ago when she was teething again...the nursing really soothed her. Maybe your son is so adamant right now because he is teething. Just a thought. Good luck!

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J.M.

answers from Pittsburgh on

Hi J.,

I would recommend taking it slow with your son. You don't want to do it too fast or it may actually be harder to wean. I found with my son that there was a dramatic decrease in nursing between 18 mos and 2 years (from 6-8 times per day to 3-4 times per day). I avoided "triggers" that reminded him of nursing and he just got busier exploring his world. I recently wrote a blog post on gentle weaning and my experiences. Take a look: http://mommynewsblog.com/gentle-weaning-one-moms-journey-...

J.

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S.W.

answers from State College on

I nursed my first until she was 22 months, and second to 14 months. It sounds like you are ready to wean. You may not want to just stop fully, but maybe cut out all daytime nursing first. My kids did not have a binky habit, so I gave them a binky instead of nursing. It took a little bit of screaming and cuddling, but they got the idea. My first one was done with the bink in a week and realized she would still get comfort from cuddling.

My second also preferred nursing to food. Once I weaned her (about a month total) she ate much better. Also offering a cup of milk and telling her that she drank her milk from cups now helped.

Best of luck!

D.S.

answers from Allentown on

Hi J.,

Contact your local la leche league representative.

www.llli.org

Hope this helps. D.

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M.C.

answers from Philadelphia on

My daughter was the same way. We stopped at 21 months. I just had to decide when I wanted to stop, and I did. I tried to reduce the number of times per day, the more I tried the more she wanted to nurse....It was hard, no, it was Sooo hard and heartbreaking for me, but after wards we had more time to play and have some fun. Yes she screamed, she threw herself on the floor, and cried and cried, but I just kept distracting her. I also started taking vitamin b-6, 200 mg a day. It helped with decreasing my milk with out pain. The B-6 was a miracle to me. With my first child, we had to stop because of an illness, I was in so much pain it was unbearable. I wish I would have known about it then! And remember it does not matter what others think of how long you breastfeed. It is up to you. Don't let anyone take that from you. You will know when it is time.
Good luck,
M.

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M.S.

answers from Philadelphia on

This is a funny answer... and it will probably sound a little crazy, but I'll just throw it out there, because if it were me and I was ready for a change, but didn't want to try the cold turkey thing (because I just can't handle the little ones crying) I would probably try anything... SO... here it is... I heard one woman covered her breasts with chocolate and when the little one was bugging her to breastfeed she lifted her shirt and when he saw her breasts that way he got so bummed that he ran away and never wanted to breastfeed again.
K... that's my 2 cents. Good luck!! My son is 2.5 and we still give him a bottle before bedtime... so we are still sort of in the same boat.
:-) M.

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R.R.

answers from Reading on

I breastfed my oldest for the same lenghth of time & I just cut down gradually in the day & he only got it at nap time & at night & he eventually stopped himself. My 3 yr old just stopped by himself at 8 months, I was so bummed. It is hard beacause the crying does get you upset, but try a sippy cup when he wants to nurse to see if it works. Good luck:)

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