Hi!
I am switching my 13 month old daughter to a new day care next week and am looking for some advise on the transition. I, unfortunately, was unable to take her to the new day care for little periods during the days coming up to her big switch, so it will be her first time there. When I first put her in day care, she was 3 months old and could care less who was feeding her, etc. When we moved and I changed her to her current day care, she was 9 months old and she did really well. She never cried when I left her. She actually cries more now when I leave her, than before.
So, when I take her to the new one on Tuesday, should I just leave her? Or should I stick around for a little while (10 minutes maybe?) to help her with the transition? This new place is actually less than a mile from my workplace, so I could always go and check on her during the day (though, I think that might not be a good idea. She might think I'm coming to pick her up to go home or something). I'm just not sure what to do.
Any suggestions???
Thanks!
C.
Hey I am also trying to transition my daughter who is 13 mths to a daycare. I don't know which one yet. But, I've learned that I can check on her as long as she doesn't see me leave or come in. Just look at her see she is okay and leave, otherwise she cries a lot and thinks I'm taking her home.
Coming from the baby-sitter's stand point, take your daughter in, say your good byes, then take her to the toys/play area and get her involved in something and slip out un-noticed. I have had mothers who will stay and it makes it harder because the child just cries all the more when you leave. Often times at this age they will cry for a few moments but can be re-directed into another activity and it isn't so bad. As far as checking on her, I would call over going and seeing her, because if you show up it will start all over again because she thinks that you are there to pick her up. Give your provider your numbers, call once during your lunch and let her be. The sooner she gets into the routine the better she will be. Make the whole thing a routine, do the same things that you used to do at the other provider to let her know that you are leaving and then do the same things when you pick her up. I know that this advice sounds harsh, but kids are resilient and pick up on your vibes. If you make it not such a big deal it really isn't going to matter to her either. The first few days might be hard, but keep up the routine and she will be fine.
J.--SAHM of 6 and I occasionally watch kids for my friends
My son is 18 months old and very much so in the "mommy" stage! He just started a new daycare about 2 weeks ago and on the 1st day, I allowed myself about 15 extra minutes to help him ease into settling in with so many new faces. As it got closer to me leaving, I went to the toys with him, found him a truck (his favorite thing!) and let the teachers know he was a "meltdown" child, so one of the teachers was gracious enough to come over and sit on the floor and completely engage him with the toys, he gave me a kiss, said bye bye, I walked out the door and that was that. He didn't even do that well at his old daycare with people he was used to seeing everyday! Having the teacher be involved the way she was was probably the biggest help! And he has not had a meltdown once when I drop him off! Hope that helps! Good luck!
I am a mother who had a child in a childcare setting and as much as it hurts to see you child cry, giving them kisses and telling them "mommy will always come and pick you up" and "have a good Day" and walking out is the best for you and your child. They always do better after mommy leaves. New situations usually are more difficult for Mommy than child. Good luck.
C.- I have owned a child care facility for over 12 years and I can tell you that every child is different. Some children do need the transition time. If you can stick around for a few minutes to reassure her I think it is better. Show her toys in the classroom, introduce her to friends and teachers, and reassure her you will be back and that she will have fun. This age is tough for seperation anxiety. It usually takes about a week for children to get familiar. Hang in there! H.
As a daycare person, if you can take her beforehand and just walk around if you can so she has seen it before.
She is obviously very easy going and able to adjust, she is used to being in daycare so it probably won't be a biggie.
DO NOT linger just give her a hug and a kiss and walk out. She is young and even if she cries she has no long lasting memory right now. Most kids calm down 5 minutes after their parents leave, but if she feels you being anxious that will just make it worse.
I would if you want and she handles you leaving in the morning you to check on her, if she doesn't do well, then don't. I would personally wait a few days until she gets the routine down before dropping in. It could upset her all over again.
For the sake of the daycare , find out what their schedules are, naptimes, snack times and so on so you don't come in an disrupt the flow of things with a visit.
As long as you are comfortable with who is watching for her and caring for her, then she will feel you being relaxed about it.
Change is hard for little ones, but at her age they bounce back so fast. She will soon learn faces and voices of those watching her and enjoy it big time.
