Time for Son's Dad to Sign over His Rights??

The dad does have visitation rights, but if he goes over 6months without seeing the child you can claim "abandonment" of the child and of his parental rights. You can discuss this with an attorney, my daughters dad never sees her either. And he pays, still. They won't take his rights away, but they won't force her to go with him since he "abandoned" her for so long. So, he pays every week, and we haven't seen or heard from him in two years now. Its nice, he pays and doesn't bother us. Look up legal issues with abandonment and parental rights.

Take care
Hope this helps

T.
Colona, IL

I would love for my ex to sign over his rights it would get rid of that "Is he ever gonna come around again" feeling and just completely shut him out.

I haven't pursued it yet because I'm getting child support and afraid to open a can of worms like the other poster mentioned could happen.

My ex has no visitation rights or anything he never tried to get any, we were never married. he was in my daughter's life consistantly for the first 4 years and then abandoned her. She hasn't seen her daddy in 2.5 years now and it's tough she hates her last name and can't understand why he left her but if I start trying to terminate his rights it won't change anything she's still my daughter and I still will have full custody so it's a waste of time and money for me right now. I am engaged and would love for my future husband to adopt my daughter but on the other hand I get alot of child support.

I looked up the Nebraska statute for termination of parental rights (Nebraska statute § 43-292). You can file a petition seeking to terminate his parental rights based on abandonment after 6 months. If that is what you want to do, you should contact a family law attorney and discuss the issues.

However, you also want to remember that there are rights that belong to your son based on the father/son legal relationship such as survivor benefits, inheritance rights, etc. A lot of jurisdictions also do not favor a termination unless there is another individual stepping forward to adopt the child. I don't practice in Nebraska so I couldn't say for sure.

Either way, that is a decision you need to make for your son. In my opinion, a bad father is a lot worse than no father at all.

C.,

I am a child of divorce. My father only saw me when it suited him which was when he wanted to exert his "power" over my mom and I. He never paid child support. My mom married a wonderful man who thought of me as his own child in all ways. It brings tears to my eyes just thinking about him.

I wanted to be adopted by my stepdad and my stepdad wanted to adopt me. My parents asked my father if I could be adopted. They told him that he could continue his relationship with me and he wouldn't have to pay child support anymore. He refused. I think it was a control thing.

Through the years we have struggled with our relationship. Once I became a young adult he basically lost all interest in me. I told him he was either in or out. I couldn't stand wondering if he was ever going to call me or have a relationship with me. He told me it was my decision. He had two small children and I wanted to get to know them so I decided to try.

I have two boys now and he was an involved grandparent for the first couple of years and then I guess I ticked him off somehow because he stopped talking to me again. He hasn't seen me or his grandchildren for 3 years. I am hurt and angry. You'd figure the pain would go away after all these years but it doesn't. I still feel like a kid when it comes to him.

Sorry for going on and on. My point is, is that your son is smart enough to know what he wants and needs. I knew what I wanted and it never changed. I wish with all my being, I would have been adopted and severed ties with him. I truly believe I would be a happier, saner person. It is important for children to know they are wanted and loved. They shouldn't have to deal with someone who acts like they don't want and love them.

Good luck,

Lisa

C.~

I think it depends a lot on your financial situation. If you are financially set I would request to terminate his rights. If you are under financial burden and he makes decent pay go after him for child support but at the same time if that is what you want to do I would try to come up with a legitimate case as to why he shouldn't have visits. I would request that he pays child support and only have supervised visits if any at all with your son. I'm sorry if any of the moms here take offence but I wouldn't go after him for money if you can take care of him on your own. Life is too short to let hatred or rage consume you. I hate that too many women go after the father for more money then it really takes to raise a child and forget that it is their responsibility to be paying for half of the child’s cost as well. My ex makes $5,000/mo tax free and I still only make him pay $250/mo for child support. The state wanted him to pay over $600. That's not necessary and I think it gives us women a bad name when another woman rakes a guy through the coals just to get even for whatever it is he did, weather it's that he hurt her or is a p*ss poor father. Bottom line, I would only ask for what is needed and ensure the safety of your son when it comes to visits. You can also make sure that the visitation rights are strict, like put in there that he has to schedule x amount of days prior to the visit this way, depending on the guy, if you make it a process for him to have visits he has to exert effort to get it, most of the time if their only doing it out of spite they will be too lazy to follow through. Good luck and I wish you the best!

You could find an attorney and start the process for full custody. If the court agrees, then your x won't have a choice. Obviously the court system isn't paying clear enough attention to your case in order for 6 years to go by without a visit. I'd start the process.

C.,

I don't think the court will overturn his rights unless he is not paying child support. If dad hasn't been by in 6 years, I'd just leave it alone and hope he stays out of your life. Bringing it to court could cause you more problems than help. I would consult a lawyer.

L. :)

Dear C.,

I've been going through a very similar situation. My son hasn't seen his biological father in 7 years (my son was only 4 months old the last time my ex saw him). My ex doesn't pay child support - we weren't married and I was very young, so I didn't want to pursue a court case. We had an oral agreement on support, but he never paid a dime. My son doesn't even know his biological father exists. My husband entered my sons life when he was 3yo and after we got married my son started calling my husband 'dad'. For years I've struggled with whether or not it's the 'right time' to seek terminating his rights. From what my cousin (a lawyer) told me, you can't terminate rights just because the guy's a jerk. If he's paying support, he'd have to voluntarily sign over his rights. If he's not, you should contact a child support agency and have them contact your ex about making payments. If he doesn't cooperate or respond to the agency, it's my understanding that you can then terminate rights because of 'child abandonment'.

The thing is, you have nothing to lose by asking your ex to sign over his rights. And if you're concerned for the welfare of your son, you should do whatever you can to protect him. I wish you all the best with your situation! Good luck.

Hello. I guess it all depends if you want to try to receive child support from the dad. I guess if he hasn't really made much effort to see his child i would definately say DO IT NOW!! Go after the s.o.b. He doesn't deserve to see his child. anyone can be a dad it takes a real man to be a father. I guess my only question is; If such a traumatic event happened to him, was anything reported to the police if it was needed? and if it was that bad why weren't the dad's rights taken away? I would definately talk with your lawyer about this.

How old is your boy? If you don't think there is hope for a positive relationship and influence I would ask him to term his parent rights. He hasn't shown much effort on his end so it's like he doesn't have a Dad. He only sees his kid when it's forced. What a scum bag. I'd request it if you think it's the right thing to do. If your son is a teenager he can have his say in the matter.

I keep seeing people tell you that you should try to get child support from him. You didn't mention if he is paying child support or not, so this might be moot. If he is NOT paying now, and you bring him to court, many times the fathers start demanding more time with their child, etc. It can open a can of worms if you take that route because it sounds like you'd like to sever all ties at this point. Just something to think about in case you're considering taking other people's advice about child support.

I am kind of in the same situation as you. My twins have never met their real dad and after the DNA, he still didnt come forward. I have often wondered if I should have him terminate his rights, and am surprised he hasnt asked me if he could. I Personally feel that he should at least pay child support(your sons dad)I am not letting the twins' dad get off scott free.My ex husband has been their dad. We are leaving the decision to the twins when they are older if they want to be adopted, or if they want to carry his name.
Good luck with your decision.
~~ANG~~