Time for a New Job??

You said that this problem resolves itself when school ends for the summer. Even if you start applying for jobs now, there's no guarantee that you'll find one.

My husband's workplace recently underwent some similar changes. My take-away from this has been that the corporate policy is just that: their policy. There have been a lot of people leaving that workplace because they feel it's sort of inevitable that things are going to stay the way they currently are and exceptions/exemptions are not going to be made. I'm sure sorry you are going through this. Sadly, corporations and companies are often looking at the bottom line-- profit-- and not always considerate of the employees who work for them and their needs. The ugly truth is that there are younger, hungry people willing to take the jobs that the more senior employees find harder to work life around.

So, it's not selfish for you to want what you want, but it may not be realistic either. It would be good to update your resume and start putting some feelers out there, albeit carefully.

It looks like your younger daughter is 13 and your daycare is two doors down from your house. Is there any reason your daughter cannot walk down and walk her niece home and stay with her until you get home?

Look carefully. You have no assurance that the next ship won't institute similar shifts.

I've seen co workers leave after our office discontinued telecommuting only to find their new company soon made a similar switch.

Best
F. B.

I understand your disappointment over your boss not able to change your hours. He has to consider what is best for the company. Who would take your shift? Your boss has to be fair for everyone. No one likes the late hours. If someone doesn't volunteer to take your shift, he can't change your shift. I really don't understand why you think your boss should change your shift when doing so makes work more difficult for your coworkers. It makes no sense to me that you deserve special treatment. Your boss should make the schedule easier for you and more difficult for your coworkers. How is that fair?

I think I understand about the difference between summer and school. Your 13 yo daughter has after school activities. I don't understand what the difference is between 7:30 and 6:3O. You can't pick up your granddaughter on the 6:30 nights either. Who picks her up on the other nights?

My daughter and her friend babysat a 6 yo and a toddler. She took a Red Cross babysitting class. 13 is not too young if she's responsible and reliable. I suggest that the day care place can let your daughter pick up her neice once you sign giving her permission to do so.

Is the summer not a problem because your daughter takes care of her in the summer? If someone else picks her up and/or takes care of her, why is she only available for the summer?

I suggest you have to be flexible. There are good suggestions from other moms. Why does your granddaughter live with you? If it's as a foster child, your state Human Services might be able to help you, at least with money for child care. I urge you to think outside the box. I suggest you make a list of options to help you picture possibilities.

I am confused about your daughter's role. If after school activities prevent her from helping, I suggest she can choose after school activities that don't have activities on Monday for the fall swchool year.

I've heard of a day care worker taking a child home with her for an extra fee. My grandson's day care was in a private home. She officially closed at 6 but she would keep a child longer when it was needed.

I suggest you find a way to get creative in scheduling.

ETA: YES you are asking them to change everyone's schedule. If you can't do that shift, who will? Yes, that means THEIR schedule changes as well. Its a trickle down effect.

There is a difference in flexibility and change. I would imagine that if you were saying "hey, my babysitter is out of town Monday, can you work until 7:30 p.m. and I will take your 7:30 p.m. shift"? THAT is flexibility. You aren't asking for that. You are saying you can't work this schedule and need it changed. I am not trying to be snotty, I'm trying to help you understand that you aren't asking for flexibility.

I understand the issue with location, routine and money but you have to decide what you need to do. As you said, this will be a problem come the fall. It might be time to move on. Good luck!
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As an employer, if I changed YOUR schedule, I would have to change everyone's schedule to be fair. It sounds like this has been working for the most part until now for you. Others don't want to change with you because they have figured out how to work within their schedule.

You are asking your employer to be flexible with your "temporary scheduling needs" But that means, it will affect others in the office. Unfortunately, your employer is not in a position to accommodate your request. Selfish? No. You can think they should honor your request until the cows come home. Doesn't mean they will.

Also, how will this be temporary come September when school starts? Perhaps you need to find a new daycare with extended hours?

You can find another job, but I would look at what you have now and compare to any other position before jumping ship. The grass isn't always greener on the other side. Good luck!

No. it's not time for a new job. It's time for your daughter to be a mommy and be responsible for her child.

If your work changes your schedule, they have to do it for everyone.

I do not understand why your daughter is not being responsible for her child. I understand she wants to complete high school. Good for her. Wait. Stop. Your 13 year old daughter has a child?? Is that how I am reading this?? Honey, you have a whole new set of problems on your hands if your 13 year old had a baby.

Why not work with your day care provider? Did you not say they were on the same street as you? Why not ask THEM for flexibility and pay extra for the days you have to work late? Why does your work need to change because of this?

I would NOT plea with my company for a schedule change. I would plea with the baby sitter for a change, either to allow the childs biological mother to pick up, even if she's not legally an adult or ask them to stay open later for you for your grandchild.

Children will adapt. IF you need to make the change in care givers, then do so. The baby's biological father should be stepping up to parent as well. Or his parents? Why is this all on you?

There is just too many unanswered questions. Your daughter needs to be responsible for HER CHILD.

Why not look for a daycare with longer hours? There are daycares that do overnights - look into one of those. There are also, at least here, a driver service for kids to pick them up from school and take them/pick them up from after school activities. So, you could hire the kids car service to transport from school to the daycare and then she could have after school snack and dinner at the daycare. I think that's better than looking for another job and throwing 13 years of seniority out the window.

You say this is a temporary need but what happens once school is back in session? How does the issue go away when school let out and not return when school is in session?

And why is this your issue rather than the child's parents? Sorry if you've explained this in other posts but I haven't looked back to see that.

ETA: The grandmother has custody of the granddaughter because mom is incarcerated for a period of several years. I would get a different childcare provider to cover the longer times due to your work schedule. No, I would not speak to my employer again as he might just tell me to "hit the streets" and then I would be up a creek without a paddle.

Original: It might be time to dust off your resume and look for something else. As you say, no one wants to trade off their hours to help you pick up your granddaughter. You might take a cut in pay in order to do so. Perhaps a babysitter or a high school/college student will be able to help you. Good luck.

The work climate has changed since the recession in many ways and not all for the good of the working parent (grandparent).

the other S.

I am a little confused. Who is the primary parent here, you or your daughter? Is your daughter (the baby's mom) 13 years old or is your babysitter 13? If you have custody and are raising this child then you likely need to either figure out better daycare/nanny/other childcare or get a new job. If this is your daughter's child, then good for you for helping out but if you like your job keep it. Your daughter can deal with the scheduling hassle and miss her after school activities. 5:30 is really early for a daycare center to close. Mine closed at 6:30 which makes a big difference.

C.,

Your daughter made some poor decisions. Now she has to own up to them and face the responsibilities of being a mommy. No more after school activities for your grandchild's mommy. Too bad. So sad. I know that sounds harsh but it's HER job to care for her child, unless of course, you are telling her to give up parental rights and adopt her yourself.

And YES - you are asking for preferential treatment. If they change YOUR schedule - they have to change EVERYONE's schedule. that's how it works.

Your daughter needs to step up and parent her child. She can pick HER CHILD UP after school and be a mommy. This is life. These are the consequences for her actions.

Good luck!

If you've been with the same company for 13 years you are probably compensated under current market rates. Time to update your resume and start the search. It looks like you have 3 nights a week that are a problem not 1 since the daycare closes at 530.

Where is baby's daddy? You are raising a 2nd generation, and it sounds like you are doing it alone. Changing jobs would only add an unnecessary amount of stress, learning the rops at a new business, loss of built up vacation time, low man on the totem pole when asking for personal days...all this is the tip of the ice berg.

Like you said, this will resolve itself in a few short weeks when summer vacation begins. I will state the caveat, your 13 year old doesn't need to be responsible for her niece. This is just stating the obvious, please don't consider this an insult to your daughter, it just isn't a good arrangement.

Instead of uprooting your means of putting food on the table, think of other adults who can help. Family, friends, mothers of other children in your granddaughter's daycare. There is help out there where you may not be looking now. You may be able to trade afternoons with someone else in a similar situation.

Don't feel like you have to do it all on your own. Sometimes the most courageous act is asking for help.

If the job doesn't fit your personal needs anymore, it's time to move on. They've made it clear they don't care what impact the schedule change has on employees. I personally wouldn't want to work for that kind of company. It's a big change to go from standard business hours to working into the night.

Will you receive a pension with this company if you continue working there? What are the other retirement benefits like? 401K match? Do they offer a good medical plan? If the beneies are good it might be worth considering sticking it out. Would it be unreasonable to hire a babysitter or nanny for temporary help a few days a week? It really depends how much you like your job and are willing to make it work. I am currently in a job that I really dislike and is inconvenient for my family. However, my husband I agreed I would only work here another 5 months until we save up a solid down payment on a house then I can quit and be home while I look for something else.
In my opinion, life is too short! If I were really unhappy I would look for something better while I hung on for the remainder of the school year. If it turns out I could get something with better hours then I would get my ducks in a row; have a good emergency fund, pay down unmanageable debt and be ready to weather a storm if the new job didn't work out like I expected. Best of luck!

I'm not sure I understand what the end of the school year has to do with it. Your granddaughter is not in school yet, is she" In your post from 16 months, ago, she was 16 months old, so she's under 3. Is this the child of your daughter who was incarcerated and who has 2 older kids? Is there another child at home who is affected by the school year? Or is it the company that somehow works on a school year schedule, and the issue will go away because the longer hours won't be in effect in the summer? And what will happen in September? Won't the same problems recur?

I'd look into a part-time nanny, maybe a high school student or a college student. You'll have to give them hours M-Th but that person can pick up the granddaughter at the day care 2 doors down, bring her home, give her dinner and perhaps put her to bed on Mondays when you are working until 7:30.

If you have good benefits and a retirement program at your job, you really have to think about giving that up. But I agree a screwy schedule is hard for anyone to manage. It does sound like everyone is ticked off that they've been assigned late hours - it might make more sense for the company to hire an extra person for a few hours every day to cover the office. It sounds like everyone is either cross-trained or all doing the same job, since it doesn't seem to matter who is there until 7:30. Perhaps all of you could come up with a proposal and present that to management. I agree that a company can't let one person (in this case, you) give up the schedule just because she has child care issues - for decades, women fought to not have their children be a reason to not be hired or promoted, so we can use it now as a reason why we can't work. But that has to do with general hiring, and not with sudden changes once someone (and in this case, several people) are already employed and on a workable schedule. These erratic work schedules don't really benefit anyone, do they?

Can you take vacation time? Sick time? Do you have any church friends who can help?
Don't switch jobs over this. I'm embracing the 80/20 rule in life nowadays.