Thank You All for Your Advice

Updated on October 04, 2006
N.L. asks from Columbus, OH
23 answers

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N.K.

answers from Cleveland on

If you are happy with the way you look don't worry about what the charts say and find a new OBGYN I weighed over 200 lbs towards the end of my last pregnancy and still weigh 175 and I am 5ft 8 inches my doctor has never told me I really need to loose weight!

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C.S.

answers from Detroit on

FIND A NEW DOCTOR!!!!! My sister lives in Columbus and has a great doctor her name is Janet Lucas OB/GYN. GIve her a call. My sister is a large girl and she never said a word to her about her weight. You ar NOT heavy! Give this doctor a call.

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K.W.

answers from Youngstown on

Find a new doctor.

First, you aren't overweight.

Second, this doctor is completely out line for several reasons. As your OB/GYN he knows of your loss earlier this year. He should be far more sensitive to your feelings. More, unless he has a real medical concern that he is addressing (such as diabetes, etc) your weight isn't his concern. Finally, for all he knows you are a recoving bulemic/anorexic. A comment like this could send someone in that position into a vicious relapse.

I would strongly encourage you to find a doctor who has a more empathetic bed side manner. Just because someone has an MD behind their name doesn't mean they can say whatever they want to you!!

:) -- btw, 135 is great and I bet you look wonderful. Hugs to you.

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M.V.

answers from Cleveland on

I would get a new doctor. I am appalled that he would say this to you. I am 5'0 and weigh 160 lbs. and my doctor suggested I only lose 10 lbs.! My normal weight is 130 lbs. The change in my body was for a good cause--my daughter! I've lost 14 lbs. so far and I feel good about it. Don't let this idiot make you depressed!

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A.A.

answers from Kalamazoo on

I think your Dr. needs a little more tact. This is a senstive issue for many women and even IF someone needs to lose weight, that is not how you approach it. You don't sound overweight to me at all. I am about the same size and feel pretty good about myself. Still working on my tummy firmness after having a baby 7 months ago, but am not by any means overweight. I wouldn't worry about your Dr's comment. The health charts are pretty accurate so if you're within normal, don't worry. Just keep exercising and eating right because those are good for all of us!

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S.T.

answers from Columbus on

Sonya,
FIND A NEW DOCTOR!!!! This doctor obviously has no tact to address you this way, nor does he seem knowledgeable about what a healthy weight should be! You are WELL within healthy weight guidelines, and if you have been exercising and eating a healthy diet, that's even better! He should be acknowledging what a great job you're doing in light of your recent loss, NOT admonishing you, and calling you FAT!! I know we are inclined to listen to doctors because they went to school, and, they are, well, DOCTORS, but that DOES NOT make them right! You should feel proud of yourself! Run, run in the opposite direction to find a doctor who is supportive and sympathetic!

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R.R.

answers from Cincinnati on

Hi Sonya,
I think his method of speaking to you was rude. I would find another doctor. I too am sorry about your baby.

I am 5'5" & 139 pounds. I have a 3 month old. I feel very overweight because I am normally a very muscular 125 pounds.
I think the "pounds" don't really tell the entire story of health, so I find weight charts worthless. I have way too much body fat at the moment. Body fat weighs much less then muscle.
I noticed that my thighs keep walking after I stop! :) & don't get me started about my jelly belly.

Alternately, you could be 140 pounds of solid muscle & only 5 feet tall & be super healthy. See my point?

I am sure you are a good judge of your own body. Let that doctor fly a kite & find someone who respects you.

Becky

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P.B.

answers from Cincinnati on

Hi Sonya. I'm sorry about your miscarriage. Just wanted to tell you that I think you need to find another doctor. I'm not trying to be rude, but your doctor should not have said that to you. I am not a doctor or nurse, but I think your at a fine weight to try to have a baby. Don't worry too much. Just be healthy for your baby, and find a nicer doctor. Good luck.

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S.

answers from Cleveland on

MY DEAR I THINK YOUR DOCTOR IS CRUDE. YOU HAVE DONE WONDERFUL TO LOOSE THOSE EXTRA 20#. YOU SHOULD BE COMMENDED FOR THAT. DO WHAT YOU ARE DOING, EXERCISE AND EAT CORRECTLY. JUST WATCH WHEN YOU BECOME PREGNANT SO THAT YOU DO NOT GAIN TOO FAT. MOST DOCTORS ASK THAT YOU GAIN 20-30# NOW DURING YOUR PREGNANCY FOR THE BABY. I WISH I WAS YOUR SIZE. GOOD LUCK AND TAKE CARE. BE PROUD OF YOURSELF, YOU HAVE DONE WONDERFUL.

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K.B.

answers from Cincinnati on

Wow...Your a good 4 inches taller than me and 10 lbs lighter. I do feel I'm a little over weight, but not a single one of my doc's has apporched me like that!! Both my regular and my obgyn simply asked what I was doing about exercise and said they weren't at all worried that once I'm done with school (working 2 jobs, school and single parent hood does not leave time for workingout often) we can worry about it then. If your within the bracket of ideal weight you should be fine!!!!!!!

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A.W.

answers from Detroit on

Sonya, that is CRAZY, you are definitely not overweight....I am 5'2 and weigh 125 pounds and everybody thinks I need to gain. You are definitely within your weight...my OB GYN was not concerned when I was losing weight instead of gaining it when I was pregnant-I gained 15 pounds with each of my pregnancies and he was totally ok with it-he said it helps decrease post-partum depression-which I never had. He said so many women get depressed because they are so heavy after having the baby. I'm not sure why he would think that-I'm sure you don't look heavy.

A.

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H.M.

answers from Cincinnati on

Not to share too much info about myself but I'm just shy of 5'5" and weight plenty more than you. My Dr's have encouraged me to lose weight for a healthier lifestyle and because I have type 1 diabetes, but my ob/gyn has never discouraged me from my pregnancies based on weight and I don't think I would continue going to a dr who did that. If you are not even overweight, based on your BMI, he should be encouraging you and congratulating your efforts - I wish I was a size 6! You go girl! Continue to work on losing the weight you want to lose and be healthy - when you are pregnant just be careful not to gain too much weight at once - they recommend a gradual weight gain - but it sounds like you know what you need and maybe you need to look for a new Dr (let me know if you need a recommendation!)

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M.M.

answers from Grand Rapids on

My advise would be to find a new doctor. Seriously - he was way out of line.

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M.S.

answers from Columbus on

Wow, I think I recently saw the same DR! I had a baby in March and gained 40 lbs. At my yearly exam, I saw a different woman DR and when she saw my weight, she told me I need to be working out 5 times a week! I didn't even ask for her advice. I am still carrying 15 lbs, but I am 5'5 and also weigh 130. She then made the comment, 'if you don't get back down to your pre pregnancy weight, you'll just be that much heavier when you have your next baby. Who said I
was even planning on having more children! THEN, she brings up that I am at risk for heart disease and diabetes (Doesnt even run in my family!)When I left and vowed never to see that woman again. She too was skinny as a rail.

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A.M.

answers from Saginaw on

Let me tell you a little something. I weighed 130 lbs. my whole life it seems like. That was my weight before I had my daughter. I am also 5'5 and I have always worn about a size 7 or 9. Very happy with the way I was. I became pregnant and when I went into the hospital to have her I weighed 164 lbs. Yeah WOW!! I still was not fat or overweight, I was pregnant!! It has been two years since my daughter was born and I still weigh 155 lbs. My pants size is now 12 or 14. I tell myself that I need to exercise and stuff but really I am happy with the way I am. Why you say? Because God made me this way. How old are you? Sometimes too they say your metabolism is slowing down so now "things will start to catch up with you." I have never been told to try to lose weight because I'm over weight. Everyone's body is different. I mean are you big boned or small boned? That makes a difference too. Sounds to me like you should look into a new doctor if you just became pregnant and aren't too far into this pregnancy. I also just want to say I know people who have gained 80 lbs. during a pregnancy and are back to their normal size again. Don't be depressed it's not good for your baby and the next time someone tells you that you are overweight and need to diet you tell them I'm not overweight I'm pregnant!! I hope this helped without me just rambling on!! Take care and God Bless~
A.

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J.R.

answers from Cleveland on

Sonya,
First of all, I'm very sorry to hear about your miscarriage.

As for your doctor's comment, I agree with the other respondents. You are NOT overweight. Google "ideal weight" and you will find lots of sources of information. Here is one that shows your ideal weight range (being 5 ft 5) is 113-149 lbs. You are well within that range. Is there any chance your doctor was teasing you? If not, I agree with the others that you might want to find a new doctor.

http://www.annecollins.com/weight-loss/ideal-weight-women...

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B.R.

answers from Columbus on

Sonya, Get a different doctor!

There are bad doctors out there who are incredibly rude and incompetent.

I once went to a diabetes specialist who told me that as long as I took insulin I would gain weight, otherwise I would urinate the excess sugar out. Well, I exclaimed that I can't just not take insulin or I could go blind, have kidney damage, and have to have limbs amputated! He just shrugged his shoulders! I told him he was hostile to diabetics and left. Incredible, isn't it? I was referred to this specialist by my family practitioner.

Another doctor who told me to lose weight said to look at her and how thin she was! She had lost weight and gone from a size 12 to an 8. That was so caddy and unprofessional!

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A.W.

answers from Columbus on

WOW!!!! You really need to find a new doc!!!!!!!! The nice thing about being in Columbus is there are so many to choose from, ask around I am sure you can find some one!!!!

Don't be depressed about your weight I am only 5'2" and when I finally got down to 135 I felt fantastic about myself!!! You have quite a bit on my so you should be feeling wonderful about yourself you lost 20 pounds that is an incredible accomplishment. Be proud!!!!

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M.K.

answers from Kalamazoo on

What a jerk. I'm your height and age and 165 and my doctor says I'm fine.

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N.W.

answers from Detroit on

Sonya,

Get a new doctor. First, you are NOT overweight. Second, you should have a doctor that supports you during your pregnancy not one who will make you concerned over gaining weight. Unless you gain a TON of weight, there is more risk to the baby if you don't gain enough.

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R.

answers from Detroit on

What?
Well, even though I am no longer working, but as a former nutritionist, dietitian I am scratching my head
here's what I remember from my studies:
For females
you get 100 pounds for the first 5 feet, every inch over you get an additional 5 pounds (this is called your ideal body weight) if you have a large frame (i think) you add 10 pounds and if you have a small frame you subtract 10 pounds

or you can use your body mass index (BMI) google BMI calculations and enter your info to give you your risk level for being over weight...but with the information you have said it does not sound like you are overweight, I would ask your doctor what is he basising he conclusion on and ask how much weight he wants you to lose and why (maybe he doing a study on you-just kidding...but stay encouraged
R.

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S.

answers from Cleveland on

Forget these drs! I had the same happen to me one time but like you said, he looked like he weighed 90 lbs and had the neck of a chicken! Weight usually is 100 lbs for someone 5' and 5 lbs for every inch over so your weight should probably be 125-130 depending on other facts, your age, bone dimensions, etc. Don't worry about it. If you feel good where you are and look pretty good, don't let what others think bother you. Good luck~

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S.G.

answers from Detroit on

Sonya

I recently saw this on the news, and thought it might interest you....btw, I checked with their body mass calculator, and it says you are at low risk for weight related illnesses...

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/14748549/

the link is for an article about spanish models being kicked out for being too skinny - many of our (usa) models would not make it their cuz they are too skinny! there is also a link their to calculate your BMI so you can see for yourself.

You would be amazed at the amount of doctors that are completely inept, and we just listen to them because - hell- they're a doctor! Believe me, being a doctor doesn't mean ANYTHING I always check things for myself on webmd or by doing a google search.

Hope this helps!
S. G.

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