Step Parent Adoption

Updated on February 19, 2008
I.A. asks from Oxnard, CA
5 answers

I am preparing for my wedding and had some questions about step parent adoption. my fiancee and i have been together for almost 10 years. We have a dtr together but i had a son prior to meeting my fiancee. my son is 12 and has never had any contact or support (emotional or financial) from his biological father. i have full legal and physical custody of my son. my son has only known my fiancee as his dad. once we get married my fiancee wants to adopt my son (son wants him to also) so he can legally be his. we are worried that his biological father can protest the adoption even though he has never had any contact with him. (don't even know where he lives). is there anything we can do to make sure his biological father can't protest or cause problems. my son would be devasted if this were to happen.

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H.P.

answers from Los Angeles on

Hi I.,
My step father adopted me too. Even though the circumstances are a bit different(my father passed when I was 3), I dont think you've got much to worry about. From what I can remember the process was fairly simple. The part I'm sure your worried about is having it in a local listing for so many weeks. hahaha when my parents and I looked for it in the paper when we went through the process we almost never found it. If the biological father doesnt even live in the area, then definitely you have nothing to worry about. I believe you only have to have the ad in a local paper. But things may have changed. p.s. and the fact that he has had no contact...I'm sure your son can protest against him. And if he hasnt paid you support whatsoever he has NO right to protest.

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C.R.

answers from San Diego on

Wow! I am going through the same process with my Fiance and my 2 yr old daughter. She only knows my fiance as her daddy. We are getting married in June and just received the adoption process paperwork in the mail. She has never met her biological Dad but he has been paying child support. I really don't know much about the protesting the adoption. All I have been told wasa that if you have leagl custody and he has never supported or met the child you don't really have to worry about anything. please let me know if there are any details.

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K.Z.

answers from Reno on

It very much depends on the state you live in but you have two things in your favor. 1) the age of your child allows for him to have a say 2) all you have to do (again depending on the state, is "try" to locate the parent by posting your intentions in a local newspaper, and even if he contests that does not mean the adoption wont go through...though he is not likely to do so, as this fully lifts his obligations to your son and he is obviously not that interested in him. Good Luck! You can hire an attorney if you run into issues, but I would try to petition the court first (usally family court has a self help desk with all the paperwork you will need, and most likely you can even download it from the county website)...ALSO paternal grandparents have to be notified in most states as well!!!

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A.T.

answers from Las Vegas on

The same thing happened when my stepfather wanted to adopt me (quite a while ago). In that state the adoption request had to be posted in the city in which the bio parent resided which allowed him to make any formal protest to my adoption. Again, he was an absentee dad and no protest was made; my parents were free to proceed with the adoption from there. If you need specifics for the state you can always ask at the county or state level regarding the legalities of step parent adoptions.

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M.M.

answers from Los Angeles on

My friend had a similiar situation, and from what I remember her telling me she hired a private investigator or maybe her lawyer who did a credit check and a background check to find where he was.. (I dont think she even knew his SSN but they got the info.) to mail him certified mail the paperwork to contest. I am vague on details because this happened long ago.

You may have to consult an Attorney just to be on the safe side.

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