Son VERY Afraid of Doctors

My daughter was very sick as an infant. In the first two years of her life she was in the hospital and doctors office dozens of times. Many times the procedures were not pleasant. She was so afraid of the doctor at this age, that just walking into the lobby of the office she would start shaking, her whole body trembled.
Around age three it ended. I remember the first time we went that she did very well. She had bronchitis and was feeling miserable. We did lots of pep talks about how the doctor can help her feel better. She was nervous at the doctor but did not freak out like she normally did. When it was over and she saw that nothing hurt she was fine. We made a VERY big deal throughout and afterwards about what a good job she did. She is five now and is a champ at the doctor.

Some tips:

The berenstein bears and little critters have a book about going to the doctor. I recommend getting these and any other kids books you can find and reading them regularly (not just before a doctor trip).

On trips that you go to the doctor for you and he is with you, talk to him before and during. Let him know where you are going and that it is for you. I remember several occasions I would tell my daughter we were going to the doctor for mommy and her asking me over and over "I no see doctor, mama see doctor. right mama?" She did fine then, but she also got to see that the doctor was not hurting mama.

Talk about going to the doctor and how they help people feel better.

Do not make any big deal out of going, and if he throws a fit comfort him but do not be overly attentive or at all emotional with him.

If he is good waiting in the lobby give him lots of praise. If he is good waiting in the exam room give him lots of praise. He won't be comfortable with the doctor if he already has himself worked up in the lobby!

Lastly, just be patient. Chances are he will grow out of this.

My daughter was like this...except I could always get her in the waiting room, because there were toys, but as soon as her name was called she would freak out! I think it was at her 4 year old appointment, where the Dr. suggested I get her involved in social activities because she would not cooperate with anyone in the office. She wouldn't get weighed, hearing test, vision test or talk to the Dr. She had always been like this at the Dr and like your little one screamed/cried through all these things prior. At four she just didn't cooperate but no crying. Anyway, he suggested a social activity, something like dance. I explained that she was just about to enter preschool. Boy what a year can change....maybe it was school. Maybe it was her age.

Before even setting foot in the appointment at her 5 year check up I explained that if she didn't cooperate with the doctor and nurses they might just send her to another doctor to be seen. Then she would just have to keep going until she cooperated. Well...she cooperated.

I think in time he will get better. I don't believe in bribing my kids for things like this. I think as he gets older he'll get better, and you can reason with him. You can talk before hand about what to expect and things of that nature. Reading books might help.

My daughter still does not like going to the Dr. But she tolerates it now.

Best wishes!

My daughter is still afraid of doctors ever since she ended up in the ER with a severe asthma attack that was brought on by pnemonia. What we have done is called the doctors office in advance to let them know of our appointment the next day and if they can not have their white coats on while we are in the examining room. Plus we bought a play doctors kit for our daughter to play with the day before the appointment and we even bring it with us so that she can examine the doctor while the doctor examines her. Seems to work really good for us. :)

i absolutely don't think you should lie to him. be honest, and very very calm. even when he's in meltdown, your quiet confidence will slowly be getting through to him. trust that over time he will start to understand that if mommy is calm and relaxed, he can trust in that and even if it's an unknown or worrisome situation, he can take his cue from you. don't let his panic get you rattled, that will just feed into his fears.
getting a doctor kit was a great idea. don't worry about whether he plays with it or not, its presence is a positive thing.
this will pass.
khairete
S.

Just wanted to add that we purchased the Elmo goes to the doctor DVD to help explain why we need to go to the doctor's. My son is two and a half and he does enjoy it. He likes Elmo, so for us that seemed like a good way to go. I bet there are other informational DVDs out there if your son is not an Elmo fan. Good luck on your next visit.

My daughter was exactly the same way! The nurses gave me a great idea...I bought her her own doctor's kit. She was able to play 'doctor' on her dolls and after that, she didn't mind going to the doctor. I also think it had something to do with the timing of her going to the doctor. She is NEVER sick...so we only went there once a year to get her check-up and get shots...so she always thought she was going to get a shot every time she went. But once we got the doctor kit, she didn't mind and was much better! Still didn't like the shots...but who does!?

My daughter is the same way (almost 2). She had to get blood work done and ever since she screams and balls in terror. She latches on to me and won't let go. She's fine in the waiting room but as soon as we head back to the room she freaks out. I can't blame her.

I'm not sure what you can do other than be clam and keep reassuring him everything is going to be okay.