Son Enjoys Playing with Dolls and Dressing Up

Updated on August 01, 2007
K.K. asks from Bloomsbury, NJ
11 answers

Since my son has been two he has enjoyed female-oriented play..He can play with dolls and brush their hair for hours. He has an older sister who he loves and adores but he is more of a girly girl than she is! I don't care but I'm worried about others' judgement and his getting bullied or made fun of. Does anyone out there have the same issue? Need advice...

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B.T.

answers from New York on

I have a 3yr old son who loves playing with his sisters barbies, he will take them out of her room and into his. I was worried at first but i believe it is just his way of being more imaginative. the barbies are more realistic with there hair and clothes you can change, more so than his plastic super heros that dont do anything. I bought him boy dolls and he plays with those too. He pretends that he is the daddy and even tries to teach it to play ball. I wouldnt worry, hes little and i think you will notice as he gets older his preferences will change. At such a young age i dont think they can see gender difference in toys. Put him in a room with another little boy and i bet they would both be brushing the dolls hair.

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R.L.

answers from New York on

My God son is 5 years old and he likes to play with dolls. His sister is 4 she doesn't play with them as much as he does also. His mother doesn't like the idea that he enjoys it so much so she started speaking to him about what is it he likes the most. She has stopped him from playing with them because she also notice that he likes to try on his sisters clothes. She is very upset over this. He is not bullied or teased but it hurts her to know that he is rejecting "boys things".
My son is 2 years old and he loves cars and trucks. So when my God son came over to play with him, he enjoyed playing with the trucks. My son also has spiderman dolls and super hero figures and they played together and the started wrestling around on the floor. So now I am thinking maybe he just needs to be around other boys that enjoy boys toys. Even though he has lots of boy toys of his own he didn't find them as interesting as the girl toys until he started playing with my 2 year old.

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C.M.

answers from New York on

At two my son saw me getting ready for a party complete with fancy dress, make-up and jewelry. He begged me to wear one of my dresses. So I put one on him. I put on some flavored lip gloss, stuck a clip in his hair, and even sprayed on my perfume and let him put a pair of my shoes on and some costume jewelry. He thought it was the best thing. I have pictures. It happened maybe twice more and he grew out of it. Now, at three, he will sometimes ask for a necklace or some perfume and I give it to him. It doesn't mean anything. All kids explore gender roles. Think about whether you would be upset if your daughter climbed trees and liked frogs. It's just more stigmatized for boys to "act like a girl". It's probably because he has an older sister he watches and imitates. Try socializing him with boys his age or a little older and see what happens. I'm sure he'll be playing with cars and trains in no time.

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T.M.

answers from New York on

Thats funny you brought this up. My son turned 2 last week and for months he has an obsession with his shoes, other pepoles shoes, tring them on, having me change them at least 10 times a day. ( I thought only girls are into that kinda stuff). Every time he plays with his girl cousin he wants the pink stroller with the babydoll in it. I honestly think its very innocent and doesnt mean anything at all. At this age children dont realize whats gender appropriate....Especially if he has a sister with all girl toys. I wouldnt worry about what other people think...

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S.M.

answers from New York on

I really do think its a phase but I am going to tell you a personal story. I am the oldest out of three and I am a woman. My brother is now 20 years old and he always played with my hair and was always feminine. He now is dating and doing all the manly things but playing any sports. I always thought my parents were hard on him and never really explained that boys do these things and they always pushed and pushed. When my brother was going through junior high and high school he got made fun of,,because he was very sensitive and girly. Kids would make fun of him saying that he is gay and I believe because he was getting rejected by girls until he met his girfriend and now things are okay. I honestly think its a phase dont' worry about love him the best you can because I felt like I was the only one loving my brother because of this issue...Good luck keep us posted

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L.V.

answers from New York on

Hello, I have a three year old son. I do believe that this is a phase. Its probably just because he spends a lot of time with his sister and mimics what she does. My son is an only child so he basically mimics what I do. The other day he went into my purse and put on all my make up. He said "look mommy I am like you". He wears my shoes all the time. If you teach him there is something wrong with this behavior he will probably become insecure. So embrace that young imaginition, next year he will be fixated on something else. :)

As long as he is secure with who he is then he won't be affected so much by bullies because he has confidence!

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N.M.

answers from New York on

Hi K..
I promise you he will grow out of it. Worring about him being bullied or anything else is npthing to worry about, as of yet.
if for some reason he is still doing "girly" things when he is 3 I would I start to worry. But he is just trying to be like the gig sister he adores...

N.

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D.K.

answers from New York on

This may be a phase. Since he is around you and his sis so much. If not...then it is what it is. You will just have to make sure he feels love at home...if he has YOU in his corner...they other stuff might hurt...but it won't matter as much. Maybe enroll him in sports to see if he likes them: soccer, swimming, karate.

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K.B.

answers from New York on

No worries.....let him have fun and take pictures. I bet if you put another boy his age with him, he just might play w/ your son as well. Then on to the next phase. There will be something else to think about!!!!!

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A.W.

answers from New York on

A lot children go through that phase
nobody cares if girl likes trucks or into sports

I completely agree that both boys and girls should be exposed to lots of different toys and experiences and should not be shamed into thinking that it’s not ok for a boy to like a doll or for a girl to like looking for spiders.
We so quick put other feelings before our children
Why not observe behavior because you could destroy young person self-esteem or think something wrong with him
We want our children grow up be kind,respectful to others regardless of gender not dicriminate someone may look or act different..We all wish little boys grow up to be responsible men to help out around house with cooking & cleaning etc....
We so harsh on boys not cry tough it up .When girl falls down everybody tries to comfort her

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C.D.

answers from New York on

It's normal for boys to play with dolls but unfortunately many paretns (esp. fathers) are programmed to stop what they consider "sissy" behavior which can be very harmful. My son used to love to comb my hair and apply makeup to my face. And his sisters used to dress him up, paint his nails, make up his face, put curlers in his hair, etc. and I never discouraged it (my husband was very concerned but I told him to just get over it). My son is now a well adjusted 14 y/o who loves extreme sports and girl watching. Just continue to love your son, talk to him and encourage him to be the best person he can be.

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