Should We Relocate to California from Pittsburgh? Has Anyone Does This?

We know 4 families that moved here from SF. Two of them started here, moved to SF for 10-20yrs, then moved back.

One family lives here because of the sense of community they never found in SF. Even though they have family out in SF, they have more help and 'extended family' here (something you said you don't have), as well as other benefits that you mentioned.

You really have a tough decision to make! I know that moving to be with my dying father made a huge impact in my life and I'm so glad it worked out for me, so I can understand wanting to be with your mom.

Good luck!!!!!!

Too funny ... I just had a friend move from SF to Pittsburgh for the lower cost of living and family there.

I'm from the Bay Area, although we left about 10 years ago because we wanted to own a home and for 500k there, we were looking at dumpy fixer-uppers. The housing prices are still crazy. I love the Bay Area and would move back in a heartbeat if home prices every fell to a reasonable level, but they didn't even do that in the recession.

There are some awesome public schools in the Bay Area (many make the list of best in the nation ... my old school in Fremont did), so that wouldn't necessarily change.

I'd say the key deciding factor is whether you really want to go back to work. SF is a dual income area and it's extremely tough to get by on one salary, unless your husband is an executive earning 200k plus. If you aren't keen on getting a job, then to me that would be the big "no" to the move. Working would also affect your ability to spend time with your mom there. Work weeks in the Bay Area tend to be more than 40 hours, so you'd be considering long hours in daycare, too.

Good luck! It's a tough call to make.

T.,
I have a bit of moving experience, (18 times in 10 years) And I would just tell you that the best way to "Bloom where you are Planted" is to have a good attitude and count your blessings, and look for the good in each area. And it seams like you have some good reasons to move. Sounds like you might just be apprehensive about the moving part, It can be quite stressful, but fun also. I think you would have as much a quality of life in SF as you do right now. If I were you I would move. Nothing beats family, and if that is important to you, go for it! Especially if your husband would be getting a raise to move, your cost of living might be the same. And "Good Friends" are the friends that you don't have to see or talk to everyday, but when you get together it is as if you have never been apart. I know about this one! So don't stress about leaving friends, you'll make more, and then you will have double the amount. Do a lot of research for good schools and neighborhoods and jump in Babe, you will love the change and newness and being close to loved ones, and your little guy will too. Just make the decision based on the one that your family would benefit emotionally from the most, then you will know you made the right one.
Good luck,
E.

Tough decision.

I understand the want/need to be by family. I wish I could be near mine.

All I would say is that be prepared for the cost difference. And it will be a HUGE life stlye change.
I moved from Chicago to Los Angeles and Had a VERY hard time with the "culture" differences. But that was just my situation, and SF is WAY different than LA.

IMO, family definitely outweights any other factors and I will tell you why. Besides the reasons you mentioned, aging mom, relationship between your son and grandma, etc., having family around for moral support during tough times, babysitting when you and the hubby need some quality time, and just having your mom there to talk to, is priceless. My husband and I have talked multiple times about moving to different places, but the fact that both of our families are here in CA, has kept us here. My mom and his parents live less than 5 miles from us, and if there is ever an emergency with the kids or us, they are only a phone call away. Some of my work friends don't have family near them, and they tell me all the time how lucky I am. I agree, so that's my input.

Have you considered living outside of SF and commuting in? While Berkeley is still fairly expensive, Oakland and some other East Bay cities are more reasonable, and that's only a 20 minute commute on the BART into town. That might decrease the impact on your finances if you do move.