Should It Be This Complicated?

Since there are so many pregnant people at work would it be possible to have a group baby shower for people at the workplace. Other people may have the same concern about their "friend" showers and this would solve that for all of you.

If the company is that large, maybe you could start a committee. Birthdays, sickness, weddings, and new arrivals. You could see if your boss would allow an you to use the office for a couple of hours after the workday is over for baby showers. Then when other occasions roll around you could have the committee purchase or make a cake and get a card. Where is use to work everybody would put it $1.00 a month. It worked very well, one suggestion is that the committee have 2-3 people on it, with a group that large 1 person might get overwelmed. Just a thought T.

I have kind of a different take on showers, parties, etc. I don't believe in the whole "invite everyone in your class" that so many people feel obligated to do. You should invite those you are close to at work, and perhaps include those that you work often with. If I were one of 65 people at a shower and barely even knew you, it could feel like a ploy to get more gifts. I personally would not feel offended to be left off of the guest list. Also, since you are in a higher position, that would make the people who are invited feel even more obligated.

You might ask a work friend to put together something much more low-key than a shower at work. A book drive for baby, a donation drive for babies less fortunate, an advice book for you (each person contributes), etc. It could be presented to you at a "no gifts" lunch or coffee hour.

J.

That happend to me too! I am a teacher and even all the parents wanted to be invited! Finally a co worker friend suggested that the school have a little get together for me as well. it worked like a charm and eased the stress of having to include everyone. i would talk to your friends at work or your boss to see if something like that would be possible. good luck and don't stress so much.....most people understand!

With that many pregnancies at your work, maybe you could have a "baby shower lunch" for everyone at once. Play a game or two, have lunch together, etc. That way everyone gets some recognition, and everyone is invited, yet it's not taking so much out of everyone's lives and not putting the bill on your friend either. Not that your friends at work would mind taking the time to come to your baby shower, I'm sure. But imagine being invited to 6 of them in a 4 month period!!!
Just a thought!

I think you should only invite your closest friend and associates. Don't give in to office politics! If asked just tell them that is limited space at your house. You don't have to give in to the high school mentality. Rise up and have a great time with those who love and support you.

jem-mom to seven

Having an office party, too, would allow you to keep your "friend" party smaller and include all who may want to come. Anyway, with 6 pregnant ladies at work, it's time to come up with an office celebration plan that will honor the 6 new moms and keep things simple for the guests/staff. At my former office, we had a shower/party at lunch. The company provided pizza, a cake and decorations. Everyone from the office was invited, and someone coordinated a group gift. With many people contributing just a few dollars each, it is possible to get a substantial gift, and those who can't afford 6 individual baby gifts will not feel obligated to spend beyond their budget. Another idea is to have each guest at the office bring a small item and create a gift basket for each mom.

Congratulations!

If you think there will be hurt feelings, I wouldn't invite anyone from work and wouldn't even mention it to anyone there. You never know - your co-workers may be planning to surprise you with a little one at work that would include everyone there and avoid any resentment.

Best wishes!

V.

Hi Liz
I would suggest that You have one of Your Good Friends at work throw a lunch hour or after work quick party and invite Everybody from work...ao No One feels left out...that way, the newer gals can double up or go together and buy You a gift without anybody feeling as if they "have to" or perhaps, Your Special Friend could suggest one BIG gift that everybody could contribute to...That way, You can invite a Sprecial Few to Your Community Shower and those coworkers not invited won't feel left out AND Your Friend and Mom won't be over burdened with throwing a shower. The other suggestion I have is to make Your shower a BIG deal for Your Daughter and find a role especially for her to participate as the Special Big Sister...perhaps She could help plan and throw the party with Your Friend and Mom...so, She is taking some responsibility in the process.
Thank You and Best Wishes,
M. B

Has anyone at work mentioned giving you a shower at work? That seems to be a good solution to overburdening the friend who is throwing the shower for your friends! If you have a close friend at work, why not ask what she thinks. I know most of my friends and family don't have the space to accommodate 65 people!

Congrats on #2!

hi, congrats on the upcoming new addition. i just thought i would pop in on this one. i worked as a phlebotomist for legacy in their central lab...there were alot of employees there. my sister was throwing me a shower w/family and close friends when i was pregnant with our first. at that time i hadnt planned on inviting people from work but wasnt quite sure. after talking w/a couple close friends i discovered that a few of the girls i worked w/were planning a shower to be held at work!! so it was going to be all co-workers. boy...did that make it simple or what?? it was awesome!! if there is someone close to you at work that you can kind of hint your concern to, you might discover that one is being planned for you there already....or it will put it in their minds to do so. let us know :) again, congrats!!

I'm with Julie - at least some of the "not-invited" are likely to feel more relieved at not having to find (and purchase, if their incomes are limited) a gift than feel slighted at being left out. Especially if they don't know you well. Might not be as big a worry as you think.

The solution for this is to explain to one or two of the people you work with who are closest to you that you can't invite everyone you want to include to your friend's shower, and see if your co-workers could have a shower for you at work. Usually that is how I have seen it done. And if that is not possible, then only invite the people you are close to from work to the shower. You are not still in middle school and you don't have to feel responsible for everyone's feelings. All reasonable people will see that it is not possible to have all your friends and co-workers at the same party, and not get their feelings hurt. I hope that helps!

Liz

Why isn't someone from work throwing a shower for you? That way your coworkers would be covered and you could relax about the number of people showing up at the more "for friends and family" shower. Definitely RSVP enough in advance so your BF will know how many to expect. She should make it easy - maybe an appetizer/dessert potluck for example so the cost is not too high and the entire thing not so much work.

We started a thing at my job where the last birthday person sets the scene for the next birthday person(s). You can just do cake or make it fancier if you like. This way everybody gets a party and no one is forgotten. If you started this tradition - volunteer to be the first one by doing your own shower (you could request no gifts so it wouldn't look like you were doing it for the stash). You know they are going to bring something anyway and again you could do a few of the new fun games, have cake and just get together as buds rather than coworkers. This is not a time for stressing!!

Have you considered doing two parties? When I had my 1st child and was still working, the office norm was that a close co-worker friend(or two!) would host a lunchtime style of shower with some potluck food or pizza, games, quiz, etc. An email announcement was sent announcing it and a card would go around and people could contribute to a group gift or just sign their congratulations. Or they could do their own gift, etc. There were a few of us that had showers like this within a year of eachother.

This way you can have a friend/family party without it feeling like you're playing favorites amongst your co-workers. Hope this helps!

My suggestion is to have two separate ones. Have your close co-workers plan the one for your workplace, and have another one for family and friends. I think that should do the trick.
D.

I had a shower at work with my coworkers when I was pregnant with my first - could you do something like that? Plan a lunch out or something - or use a conference room at your office? That would be my suggestion. Then you could invite who you wanted to your house and there'd be no "obligation" feeling :) I had 4 separate showers...one at work, one at my mom's, one at my house, and one that I didn't even attend (my family got together in another state and threw me a shower and sent me the gifts and pictures of who gave me what). There's nothing wrong with having more than one :)

You're in a tough situation. I had the same problem when I had my shower, in that I had a lot of "outside of work" friends I wanted to invite and then a whole other group of co-worker friends. What I did was invite my long-term co-worker friends that I spent a lot of time with outside of work to the shower with the "outside of work" group, and then the people I worked with but didn't socialize with much outside of work threw a shower too. I know it's complicated, but if you're honest with them that your friend has limited space and can't accomodate everyone you want to invite, I'll bet that someone will want to throw you another shower.

Good Morning! I certainly don't think so. I've had friends in similar situations, and they just have multiple showers. One for the office people at a restaurant, one at your home for close friends, etc. It worked very well, and kept my friend at a low stress level.

I hope this helps! Good luck with the last leg of this journey.

Oh! My dad was 10 years older than his brother and they were always close. I hope your children are as well.