Should I Consider Not Going on a Free Trip to Europe?

Babies are only babies for a very short time. The trip doesn't sound like it's a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity, but rather something that happens every year. If I were you, I'd skip it.

If I couldn't bring my baby I wouldn't go. It wouldn't even be a question for me.
Taking care of my babies has always been far more important to me than a trip here or there that I wouldn't enjoy anyway because I would miss my babies far too much to do so.
Call me clingy...or old fashioned is more like it.

I would skip it. I do envy you for being afforded the opportunity to go every year, but I always put my kids first.

You get to go EACH year. This is not some once-in-a-lifetime dream trip; it's an annual trip where you basically are on duty, not really a relaxed tourist. It's nice that you think of it as a privilege. But it's time to give it up, for maybe just ONE year, for the privilege of being with an infant.

Truly, stay home. You do not owe some big explanation to your colleagues and they don't need (or really want) to know that it's about breastfeeding. Don't go, say you have a young child at home and will go next year or the year after. Greece isn't going to go anywhere in the meantime, is it?

This will not be the last time you have to give up something you've always done before in order to do something for your child. Get used to saying no and sticking with it.

Can you pump and store up breastmilk so she won't have to have formula while you're on your trip? Even if you can't store any while you're actually away, you should be able to pump and dump. I know the idea of dumping that perfectly good breast milk sucks, but it would suck harder to have to completely give up on breastfeeding for a one week trip.

I would have a really hard time passing up a free trip to Italy and Greece, those are on my vacation bucket list. And your daughter is never going to remember that you were gone for a week.

If you have an option (i.e. - not a requirement of your job), I would stay home this year...not just because of breastfeeding but because this is a very long time to be away from an infant. Her dad and her grandparents are NOT the same thing as being with her mom, and you would likely miss her far more than you could imagine. Of course, if you do go, you'll probably get more sleep than you have in the last 8 months....

I'd go just because that's "me". But you've been on these jaunts before. IF there is someone in the wings to take on your responsibility, then take the year off. If not, don't leave them hanging. You made the commitment and need to honor it if someone else isn't able to do what you've committed to do.

Dawn

Nursing my girls was way more important to me then a trip anywhere. Wouldn't have traded those times for anything and I know it was the right start on a pretty darn good path for my family.

If you are conflicted, listen to your heart.

When in doubt I always side with "family first". That makes it easier. Good luck!

Since you go every year, you can go the following year. I had a trip planned and I regret weaning to go on the trip. Not only that, while there (Hawaii) my hormones were all over, affecting me emotionally and physically. This is, of course, an individual choice so listen to that inner voice on this.

If this was a free trip to go along with hubby on a business trip, I'd say no. But since they need you and you are obligated, I'd say, find your replacement or go.

I would not go. But I have strong feelings about breastfeeding and its health benefitsz so personally I would not even consider going weaning to go on a trip. There is plenty of time for trips, but your baby is only going to be 8 months old once in a lifetime.

I'll be interested in seeing which option you choose. Do let us know.

As a teacher myself, I would be ecstatic to have a week with my baby at home rather than going on a trip with my students. That and the fact that I like traveling with my husband, my best travel companion ever, rather than large groups of people.

I am sure you will be able to find another person on the staff who would like to go in your place, but you'll want to give them a bit of time to know.

When I have chaperoned abroad, yes, going made me have a responsibility to the kids, and my colleagues expected me to go because I said I would go, but it wasn't in my contract that I had to chaperone on the trip; people can be bummed that their favorite friend isn't going, but you've got good reasons for not going this year.

You sound like you don't want to go. Take a look at how you feel and make a decision.

Yeah, I would go. I've never met a child who remembers something from 8 months old. Then again, I have no qualms about formula. AND, I wasn't able to nurse. I don't really understand the emotions connected. Really, only you can decide.

I would take her with me if I were you. You both can go together and she can still nurse. If your responsibilities will be too great to deal with while having your daughter with you then I think you should see if your mom can come too.

Honestly. I'd skip it.

I nursed my kids for between 14 - 17 months... and I wouldn't give back those last 8 or 9 months of nursing for anything.

Good luck.

I would go... It is also a part of your job responsibility.

I don't get why you are so emotionally torn up about it. The baby will be just fine and well cared for. You don't have to stop nursing and it is not going to hurt the baby to eat some formula for a week... The baby is not a newborn.. she/he is 8 months old. The baby will not forget who you are either....

How does hubby feel about your lack of trust that he can hold down the fort while you are away? Give dad a chance to bond with this baby as well.

That said, it is your choice bottom line. HOWEVER, as a parent, I would not want my child on a huge trip with a chaperone so detached from the job emotionally that my child may end up in danger.

If you cannot fulfill your duties 100% spot on, you need to talk to your bosses and let them know you are not capable of this responsibility at this time.

When I read your headline I thought "well what could possibly keep you from going to Europe for FREE?" However given the details, if I was you I would pass on the trip this year and let someone else have a turn... your baby is only little once... Europe will still be there next year.
Good luck.

I would skip the trip, especially since this is something you get to do every year.
Pumping will be very difficult, even with a battery pump, and there's a chance your baby will self wean while you're gone anyway.
The nursing phase is SO short, stay home and enjoy it, and it sounds like that's what you REALLY want to do anyway!

If you get to go each year I think I would take this year off and stay feeding your child.

If she were weaned and just a regular baby taking formula then I'd say go and enjoy the trip. I imagine it will be wonderful.

I wouldn't go. I tend to stick close to my babies, making sure they have lots of security when little.

If you don't want to, then don't go. Obvious something is telling you that nursing and your daughter are more important.

If it were me, I wouldn't go. You go every year with your students. They and you will survive if you bow out one year. Nursing was really important for me and my daughter. It is a really special time that, once it's over, you don't get back.

Another option would be to bring her with you. I took my 18 month old daughter to Paris and she was awesome. An 8 month old would be even easier. Perhaps your husband could go with you and take care of your daughter on outings that she wouldn't do so well with (e.g. museums).

Okay off the wall suggestion:

Can you take her with you? Since she is under two her airfare is free. I would check into the availablility of baby food that she is used to or plan to take it with you. Hotels are happy to provide a crib then all you need is a stroller.

Or I would do as Cheryl suggests pump and dump.

Instead of switching her to formula pump as much as you can before you go and freeze so she can have breastmilk while you are gone, if you can't take her with you.

You kinda hit me in a blind spot, Italy and Greece are two of my dream vacations.

This is not something we can answer for you, really. However, what do you think you'd regret more? Missing the trip? Or, forcing your child to wean early and leaving her? The trip will be there next year. Your child will not nurse forever. I would probably stay home. Telling you to go on the trip and enjoy yourself is easy from our end, but I don't think you'd actually enjoy yourself.

Is taking your baby with you an option? We were living overseas when my daughter was born, and she had more stamps in her passport than most adults by the time she was two. If your baby is comfortable as a backpack or sling baby and you don't mind toting her all day while you're out (and if nursing in public doesn't bother you), it can be done. Many other countries are not as uptight about public nursing as ours is. Since you've made the trip before think back - have you observed nursing moms? Is your daughter a discreet nurser? Mine was not (she hated to be covered), but in Asia where I was living, it really did not matter.

Also, how much of a problem would it be with your (potentially narrow-minded) colleagues? Would the adults traveling with you be supportive? Would there be any blow-back from the parents of kids? (There shouldn't be, in a perfect world, but we don't live in that perfect world.) If there is something said by a jerk in the group, would your school support you and your right to nourish your child, or make trouble for you? I took my nursing daughter on a group tour to China with no trouble. It worked beautifully, partly because most of the others on the trip were moms and dads, and there was another mom/baby nursing pair.

If your only choices are stop nursing and go, or stay home and keep nursing, in your shoes I'd stay home and keep nursing. I wouldn't risk losing the nursing bond. You'll have other chances to go abroad. You won't get another chance to have a nursing relationship with this child. It sounds like you don't desire to stop, so please don't.

oooh this is not a decision I would want to make for you...

you need to weigh your options...

continuing breast feeding or going on a trip.

which is more important to you? Do you think you would be comfortable just stopping nursing while on a trip?

Do I think you could do it? Yes. There are battery operated breast pumps - medela has one - single breast use - where you could pump and dump. and not worry about stopping...but again - but this is something you need to decide...

What would **I** do? Knowing that my child will be well taken care of while I am on my trip - I would probably go and figure out how to pump and dump...I'd express milk for the trip so my child would get bottles of breast milk for the trip....I know with my oldest son - i could've done with without a problem as I had PLENTY of milk. With my youngest son? Nope. but he self-weaned at one year. Just stopped.

Good luck making your decision!! I am sure it will be a hard one!!

I would skip it this year. Sounds like you would feel very sad about stopping nursing this soon.

I would take the trip.

If you really wanted to go and were being pressured to stay home, I say "go". If you were ready to wean her, I'd say "go". But it doesn't sound like you really want to go. That's your answer. I am positive they will not have trouble finding another adult to go on a free trip to Greece. Missing your daughter is one thing and that's hard enough, but stopping nursing when you aren't ready is something else. And, not that this should be your primary rationale, but by staying home you will actually be setting a good example for the students - if you have a baby, it's a forever thing, and the baby comes first, before fun times like trips and travel. There will be other trips. There will never be another chance to nurse and spend this time with her. Listen to your body and your heart. This trip is NOT your responsibility - it's an option. You can choose it or not. Tell your colleagues now. They have got to be understanding - if they aren't, you know what kind of people you are working with. Just be honest and say what you said here - I thought I would be ready and I have made all kinds of plans, and you know what? I'm not ready. If there's no teacher in your school, many of your colleagues will have a million contacts of people who would jump at the chance to fill in.

Why wouldn't you be able to pump on the trip? I agree with the poster who suggested you stock up on pumped breast milk before you go, then pump and dump while you are away. You family can supplement with formula if they need to, and you can keep your supply up. It is only a week, right?

Unless you can take your baby and husband, I don't understand WHY you are asking this question.

It's hard to say. At this age my daughter self-weaned. But each child is different.

Will the chance to go to Italy and Greece come up next year or will you go to a different location?

If it were me I would go but then these are two of my bucklet list locations.

If you go and you pump and dump. I don't think it would be that hard to start back up nursing. How many times do you read about people who stop and start up again due to an infection or something in the breast and they are successful? Many. It is only for a week or so.

So do want you will. But good luck to you either way.

The other S.

I know this is out there, but would it be at all possible to bring your child and have a family member come with you? If it were me I would have to ask and see if there were a creative option that might work.

the baby should be weaning off formula soon. around 12 months you will start with regular milk. i would absolutely go on this trip. and enjoy yourself.

I second the battery pump by Medela.....i also have the hand pump and it works really well. When my youngest was little i didn't have a job that lent itself to pumping. So, I'd end up with the battery or hand pump sitting in a bathroom or my car. I pumped and dumped a lot more than i wanted....but such is life. And by 8 months mine was eating food so my supply wasn't what it was before she was eating, so i didnt get engorged if i couldn't pump every so often...sometimes i would nurse in the morning, pump midday, and go home and nurse and i was fine.

If someone else can easily go, I wouldn't if I were you. And I didn't even breast feed that long bc I had horrible deliveries so was sick and made so little milk. It's not about the breast feeding for me. It's just the idea of leaving an 8 mo old (or really any age until they're say 11 or 12) for that long if you don't have to. If you do have to, then try to enjoy and figure 8 mos of breast feeding is a lot. But otherwise, I just wouldn't want to risk flying that far and/or being away for that long.

Are you sure there isn't a way to pump? Even if you only could pump a couple of times a day, I think you'd be able to maintain a supply and resume breastfeeding when you returned.

However, if you definitely can't pump while you're away, then I would skip the trip this year.

Has your baby ever taken a bottle?
If not, you NEED to see, IF she will, or not.
Not all babies will take a bottle.
My daughter would not, no matter what I tried.
My son would. But then he preferred, a bottle.

I nursed both my kids.

Then, you do not know, nor can you "predict" how "weaning" will go, with your baby.
Not all babies will wean, at this age.
And not all babies, will take Formula. Either.

So you need to consider ALL of this.

If it were me, I would not go.
These trips occur every year.

Weaning and stopping nursing, and switching to Formula, and switching to a bottle, is not always so easy or predictable.
And you don't know, if your baby will take a bottle from others.
And they will not know, your baby's routines for naps or bedtimes etc.

Your baby is young.
And while away, you will, worry about baby.
Its only normal.
And your breasts, may get engorged. Then what?

Your colleagues, are "expecting" you to go.
But you have a young baby.
If they have kids themselves, maybe they will remember what it is like, with a young baby.

You either please your colleagues, or do what you inherently feel is best, for your baby.

Let some other teacher take the trip.