Seeking Info

SM-

My great niece had this in preschool

She's in Kindergarten and she doing great, as for
speaking.
Her focus is the next step.
VERY bright child.. late talker do not talk in class
at first.
She did have summer classes and extra montioring
thru out school year.

A. -

People Magazine did a big story on kids with SM a few months back. It was very interesting and I believe there were some "help" sites printed for more info. I'm sorry that I can't recall exactly when the story ran, but I'm sure you could find a link to it if you search their site.

Good luck. L.

I think I know how you must be feeling. My son did not speak for months in preschool last year. The teachers agreed that he fit the description of selective mutism to a 'T'. However, they had an after-hours program that was optional, and only 2-3 kids would attend at a time. We decided to try this mid-year and found the smaller group was just what he needed to come out of his shell. He gradually gained confidence, made close friends and blossomed from there. Today he is a young five in kindergarten, participates fully (although still prefers not to be the center of attention) and is at the top of his class. It was amazing what the experience of a smaller group did for him. Best of luck to you and your daughter, we know the worrying you are going through. BTW, I have a BRAND NEW (still in box) workbook and manual on Selective Mutism -- "The Selective Mutism Resource Manual" by Maggie Johnson. I ordered it and then found we didn't need it. If you are interested in it for a VERY good price, let me know!

I do agree with others here that overstimulation is KEY. The more going on the harder it was for our son, he the type to sit back and observe before jumping in, and if it's chaotic, he appears to become anxious internally. Less of an issue as he's gained confidence.

HI A.,

I have heard of Selective mustism. I saw a story about it either on 20/20 or 60 minutes. I can't remember which one.
the program interviewed several parents whose children had selective mutism. If I can remember correctly these children had the ability to speak very well except. But when at school or any other public place they would not speak.
I remember there were several children featured in the program who overcame it with some type of speech therapy.
Sorry I can't remember more of the details. I believe someone had a post on this website about it several months ago.
UPDATE: The post on Selective mutisum can be found on this site under special needs (10-13-2008 post).

Hi A. B
Sounds like you have some beautiful & sensitive kids. I just read about SM after reading your post. Here are a few sites that looked good to me, you may have seen them before.
This ones mentions it as a social anxiety disorder. That made me wonder if rescue remedy could help.
http://www.social-anxiety.com/area-selective-mutism.html
group
http://www.selectivemutism.org/
parent teacher resource site
http://selective-mutism.com/
rescue remedy
http://www.rescueremedy.com/products/

I've used rescue remedy when I'm stressed, for deep emotions, I give it to my daughter when she was stressed, over tired, I've given it to the cat before going to the vet or when guests come over, my husband has used it as well. I know people who give it to there dogs, and horses. I haven't used it much in the past few years. My daughter is 5 now, and has learned how to breath through things now.
I wish you the best of luck. A. H

Hi A.,
Many youngsters do chose to stop talking in situations where they feel lack of control or some degree of anxiety or emotional discomfort. Being a speech-language pathologist, I will say DO NOT have her evaluated by a speech-language pathologist. Selective mutism is not a speech-language disorder, it is a psychological issue. If she communicates appropriately at home, you may want to have her see a psychologist or social worker to help reduce her anxiety. Also, if preschool is new to her and she's feeling like she can't control her environment, she may be choosing to remain silent in order to feel some type of control. When children are that young, talking is one of the few things they have real control over. I hope this helps.

K.

A.,

I am a former preschool teacher and have heard of selective mutism. One year I had a student who had SM. At school, I tried whatever I could to get her to talk, but I found it was something that couldn't be forced. Bribary, anger, and ignoring didn't work. I did try to get the student to communicate just by pointing to their choice. I do have an article from thr GR Press about this. If you are interested, I will dig it out and email it to you. I know it is very frustrating, but I believe it is something your child will outgrow.

A. Fleck

Hello A., Some children communicate with body language rather than with words. You cannot force your little one to speak, but encourage her with possitiveness and enthusism. Reward her efforts. Trama or great stress is usually the cause, so don't add to it. As long as your daughter is feeling safe and secure she will slowly open up. It may not be verbally at first but it is a good sign if she is trying. Let her set the pace, the more you push the less safe she will feel. If you can stay focused on her efforts rather than her failures then you will be supporting your daughter. Don't stay focused on your belief that she cannot grow out of this, she can and she will! But only if she is given the time, space, love, support, and kindness that she needs. It will be a slow prossess but that is still progress. Good luck.

A., my kids are receiving services at the Abilities Center in Walled Lake. Check out there website for the extensive list of psychological, OT/PT/speech services. You might call them and ask about selective mutism, I am sure they have heard of it/treated it. Good luck!

I've never heard of that label but my sister in laws kids won't talk to me or anyone outside of their comfort zone. So if she were to put them in school (she home schools) I'm sure they would label them with something. One never talked, ever, to me and now he is almost 7 and you would never know. In fact, he is very intelligent. Now she has 3 more below that and the baby is too young but the other two, you will only hear them talk if they are talking to her (mom). So....it's different, but it will all work out.

Hi A., I'm a grad student in speech-language pathology with one semester left- selective mutism is something that your daughter could receive speech services for in school. I would ask the teacher to make a referral to the speech-language pathologist and I would think they would do an evaluation. Or, if there's not a speech therapist at school, you could ask her pediatrician for a referral.

Hi A.,

I am a speech language pathologist in the public schools and my co-workers and I were just talking about students with selective mutism this past Friday. Based on the research I have read and the children that I have serviced, it seems to be more of an anxiety issue then a speech and language issue. Does she speak at home and in other settings outside of school? She may be very overwhelmed with everything going on at school that she is busy processing everything. Is she tired when she comes home from school? There are so many factors that need to be looked at. I would definitely take a look at her anxiety level at school, whether or not she is being over stimulated, and how she responds in other situations outside of the home. You may want to contact your district's psychologist and speech language pathologist. If you have any questions feel free to ask!

Selective mutism is a specific problem where a child, who can normally communicate in other areas of their live such as at home or with friends, does not communicate in a specific situation due to some psychological issue (most typically anxiety). I am a psychologist and have friends who work with this population and they do very well with psychological treatment, where speech treatments do very little. I would contact your insurance and see if they cover psychological treatment for your child and have them give you a list of child specialists. If you cannot afford treatment, it is often costly, you can contact local universities (Wayne State has a treatment clinic with individuals who focus on children, you can reach them at ###-###-####) and see how much they charge or they can refer you to other locations/places/people. Good luck, and good for you for being in tune to your child and wanting to help!

A., I can so relate to you! My dtr who just turned 5 never spoke almost her entire year of school (last year). I'm an Occupational Therapist so I knew developmentally she was fine. They wanted to have a Speech Pathologist Eval her. but I declined because I knew they would not be able to get anything out of her and I was afraid it would stress her more. She was fine at home and with her close friends but in public she wouldn't say a word. This was so frustrating for me. We weren't able to get her pictures taken because this would freak her out. She was also very hypersensitive to sound. We ended up getting her ear muffs to help reduce the loud sounds when needed (ie., movies, Disney etc...). She was able to make some friends in school even though she didn't converse with them very much. So, I worked very closely with her teacher to try and decrease her anxiety. Some suggestions are to have her involved in the classroom without speech, ie., line leader, paper passer, chair keeper...Then slowly grade the activities to include very limited speech. The other thing that worked really well for us was to have her Grandma go to class with her a couple of times. Not me, because she would view me as her safety net. Her Grandma helped reduce her anxiety and draw her friends into conversation. I am happy to say that this year she has made huge progress! I can remember one time when we were in Lowe's and this elderly lady was behind us talking to my dtr and asked her how old she was. My dtr then told her what grade she was in and how old she was. She was so surprised herself that she started to giggle and look at me. Of course, I was joyous that my dtr talked to a stranger. I didn't think that was the appropriate time to discuss stranger danger either :) My dtr is now in full day kindergarten and doing great. We were fortunate enough to go to Montesorri so she has the same teacher and some of the same students. She is talking to all her classmates, still some limited conversation with the teachers. SHe has really come out of her shell. We even had her first birthday party with her school friends and she even allowed the photographer to take her picture at school without crying. Is she 100% outgoing, No, but that's okay. I did get a really good book called Helping your Child with Selective Mustism by Angela McHolm. They had some good tips on how to help your dtr. We also involved her activities that we could participate with her. She played soccer this year and has yet to speak to her team mates, but she's out there! Look for some parent and tot activities so she gets exposure to other social situations with the comfort of you present. I know how you're feeling but you can help her. If you need any advice or support, please drop me a line...Good luck to you and your dtr...L.