Really Wierd Room Sharing Question

Updated on August 01, 2011
J.B. asks from Marrero, LA
11 answers

Just a really quick question....we have talked an processed a lot and decided that our oldest son will keep his own room and our middle and baby boys will share. I have such cute little room ideas and am going to make it special for all of the boys, of course the baby won't really know, but that is part of the fun :D So the question I have is this, the baby will move to his crib at about three months and my middle will be just at about 25 months or so. Do you think there is any danger of him like climbing into the baby's crib and suffocating him or something weird like that or like maybe trying to comfort him if he cries and pick him up? I don't know why this just popped into my head and now I feel a little worried. Of course I know MANY parents have had to have a two year old and a baby share I guess I am just looking for some reassurance or to hear if this really is a risky thing to do. The reason we want to have the older in his own room is that the middle still naps daily and I just can't see telling my older son he can't go into his room for 2 hrs everyday, the older is the one who has had to give up more as far as going from being an only to older brother status and we just wanted to make him feel super special as the older bro of two siblings as he is more of a high strung kid at times. The middle and younger being together we feel will be easier bc the baby can always nap in my room in a pack n play and the middle will have his own little space to nap daily, he is very big on napping, if you can believe that!! So it seems the best all around except for this one concern...thoughts?

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So What Happened?

oh yeah, love this site so much! I am going to purchase a crib tent, problem solved!! thanks mamas! Well I hadn't thought of him putting something in the crib, I don't think so though, my middle is a mellow sweetie so I don't know if any of this would be an issue anyway. I got to thinking of it bc my older one jumps in my little one's crib all the time and they jump around and cuddle in the morning but I am always in there, so I was concerned my little one would do that with the baby and maybe hurt him not realizing it of course. Thanks mamas, I think the tent will solve my issue!

More Answers

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S.S.

answers from Daytona Beach on

my 2 shared a room for a short time at the same ages. my oldest didn't ever try anything with my youngest. she never had any interest to climb into the crib or such. my mom, however, used to watch 2 kids that are the same age difference as yours and the older child DID crawl into the crib and pick up the baby and drop her. the baby was fine, but he did it about 2x before he didn't do it again.

1 mom found this helpful
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K.R.

answers from Denver on

I suggest getting a crib tent. Problem solved!

1 mom found this helpful
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R.P.

answers from Cleveland on

i fully believe in babys especially under one and who are not sleeping through the night to be in their own room so they dont wake up their room mate and you have two kids awake at the same time one being super cranky from being woke up.

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C.W.

answers from Washington DC on

I really think this depends on your older child and his personality. my daughter would never have tried this, she wouldn't even leave her bed unless she had permission to do so. My son, on the other hand, is a completely different matter. He would probably be climbing into the crib to jump out. He is sharing a room with his sister now and one of the reasons we didn't get bunk beds was because I was terrified he would be up on the top bunk jumping down (he did this on vacation once). We can tell him a million times not to do something but the temptation always wins out. Right now he is 5 and we tell him not to wake his sister every night and some mornings he can't help himself and jumps on her in her bed. Only you know what type of kid your middle son is.

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M.S.

answers from Chicago on

We were in a similar situation. My middle guy was 26 months when we moved the baby in his room. I did not think he would go into the crib and intentionally hurt the baby, but I was worried that he would climb in and hurt her by mistake. We put a crib tent on the babies crib, just to be on the safe side! He was super interested in the baby and we were afraid he may try to love her just a bit to much!!

1 mom found this helpful

A.H.

answers from Portland on

Great idea babe, crib tents will be awesome for that. My brother was 2 when I was born, he would throw stuff in my crib. You should teach him that he can only get in the crib when your that, that way hopefully he won't do it when you aren't there.

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V.W.

answers from Jacksonville on

In addition to the crib tent idea, perhaps you could talk with your middle one, and set some "rules" for the bedroom. i.e., if baby needs something (is crying), get an adult. Never put anything into baby's crib--always check with an adult. That sort of thing. You don't want to scare him about it, but if you just make it a rule then if he is a good "rule follower" (some kids are REALLY good about stuff like this) then it can help him feel "helpful" without worrying about doing something "wrong" on accident.

You could even tell him that some things are okay for baby to have and some are not, and that what is and isn't will change from time to time and that even adults have to think about what is okay and what is not sometimes...so, to make it less confusing, he should ask an adult.
Kids actually do like boundaries.

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K.L.

answers from Medford on

Id actually put the baby in with the older boy until he is old enough to defend himself from the middle child who might try to toss toys and blankets into the crib, or get in himself. You dont really want to take that chance. The 2 hours for naptime is not thaat big a deal. You tell the older boy, to get whatever he needs out and go play in the rest of the house while baby naps, and he will be fine. It will teach him to be mindful of what others need. The baby is so young he wont know the difference for a while and in 6 to 12 months you can switch rooms around and give the older boy his own. Then the 2 younger ones will nap at the same times and be fine together.
I have never had or seen a crib tent in person, but from pictures I do wonder,, what if the little guy tried to climb into the crib and fell in with the tent? Is that possible? Would that make it more dangerous for the baby?

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M.D.

answers from Houston on

I hope you get this since you have already made a decision. I had 3 children in 33 months. We lived in a 2 bedroom house for a while. Needless to say they all shared a room. You only have problem if you make it an issue first. If they start to put things in the crib, then you can say or discipline them. Children are very resiliant. I think sometime we worry to much and that leads to more problems. Relax and enjoy life. Mine survived and 2 are now married and 1st has our first grandchild with the 2nd on the way and they will be 18 months apart.

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L.A.

answers from Dallas on

Yes, it is a valid concern. My daughter is 18 months older than our baby and while she loves her sister like crazy, she can't always control herself to be safe around the baby.

I've caught her throwing blankets into the bed because she knows they are the babies, she's dropped toys on the baby's head to help soothe her, etc. Don't get me wrong, I'm with the kids all the time, but this girl is quick!

My babies DO share a room and share it successfully. The older is 24 months, the younger is 6 months old and it's working like a charm. In fact, when considering a move to a 3 bedroom house I'm torn about whether to separate them!

My doctor's take on it was to just be very aware of the concerns but to move ahead if we wanted to. Since moving the babies in together, the older baby has become much more cautious and the younger is crazy about her sister. No joke, big sis gets a smile and a hug from the little baby before I do after naps!

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K.W.

answers from Los Angeles on

I was also going to say the same about it depends on your kid, but certainly possible. Also, I was afraid (I have the same age difference with my kids) that my 2 yo would put something in the crib- a choking hazard or food- maybe even to be "nice" and to "share" with baby. As it turned out he was a real rule-follower and very protective of the baby so it wasn't an issue. But it's another consideration. Not sure if the crib tent solves that problem.

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