Properly Discipling a Child

Hi C.,
I know you posted this a while ago, but I just came across it and wanted to share something. I have a 3yo boy also, and while your current life situation is very different from mine, the three year old behavior is not. My son is potty trained ans speaks well, but like yours he does not listen to me, everything is a battle and he complains about everything (not enough bubbles in the bath? Yes he screams about that. Wrong movie? Yes, that is always an issue. Wrong food? Oh boy, look out 'cuz here come the tears!). He screams and complains about everything. I think it comes with the age. Another mom once told me that age three was worse than the terrible twos, and I did not believe her until I experienced it for myself.

I would work on the potty training for now and let the other little things go. Too much at once can be overwhelming at that age, so you have to pick your battles. Leave the behavior charts alone for now and just focus on potty training. Once he has that mastered then you can move on from there. Sometimes the only thing you can do is ignore the complaining/screaming/crying and go on about your business. But you do need to set limits when he becomes physical. He needs to know that is is okay to be disappointed, but physical violence is unacceptable.

It sounds to me like a few sessions of family counseling with grandma along are in order. I didn't live here when the boys were younger, so I can't recommend anyone.

When the boys were younger I would try humor and imagination and sometimes it helped. I would say things like "You're lucky I'm not a mean mom. If I were a mean mom I would paint your tongue purple for saying that." Another thing you might try is a "magical" solution. Buy him a magic bear and the next time there aren't enough bubbles in the bath give him the magic bear who will fix it for him. That way you're out of the picture and he can yell at the bear. You could start a sticker chart for the bear for every time the bear goes to the potty or is a good boy, and then tell your son when he gets ten stickers you are going to take the bear out for a treat.

God bless you for all that you do.

i'm not sure if this is advice you want to hear, but since his dr. said he is not talking clearly enough for you to understand, perhaps speech therapy can help.
my son is almost 2 and not talking very much, so we have been going to speech therapy every other week and it has helped a lot.
people say you don't want a 2 year old who can't talk/communicate or they will become Very frustrated.
D.

Sounds like your son is just trying to get your attention; because you are in fact a single mom and have to be away. I know this is probably not an option but as soon as my friend left her high paying job and stayed home with her kids, all the crazy behaviors stopped. Her son started talking and they worked on potty training.

The pull-up situation just doesn't sound that badly; but If I were you, I would cut back on school and go back when your child is older and in school.

He just sounds like he needs his mother more than one else in the world.

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This is my most popular program for kids:
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If you want to discuss how it may work for your son (and even you) feel free to contact me.

B., B.A.;B.Ed.
Family Nutrition Coach