Potty Training a Stubborn Boy with PPD

A friend of mine is dealing with this too her daughter is 6 PDD. She discovered that "a" is actually diaper trained, she thinks that the diaper is where you have to go potty and the toilet is just where you throw it away (they cloth diaper btw) So they did some intensive potty training over Christmas break. Basically took "a" to the toilet every 10-15 minutes and had her sit there for 10-15minutes or until she went potty, reading books, redirecting her when she wanted to get off, singing songs, even took the small tv from the playroom and dvd player into the bathroom to watch cartoons on, anything to get her to stay. After about 3days of this "a" started going into the bathroom on her own. They are doing better with it now.

I have a stepson with autism and when he came into my life he was 7 still drinking from a bottle and in pullups all day long. In 54 days of one summer I potty trained him by withholding his favorite treat...Doritos, he learned quickly that I was serious and that in order to get one of the chips that were in the bathroom with us he had to pee in the pot. By the end of summer he had only 3 accidents that I will take credit for 2 due to painting a bedroom and not paying attention to his bladder. Anyway, stay on it and do not give up, his mother decided that when we returned him it was easier to have him in pullups and by Sept. 23 at his IEP meeting we asked how many days a week he came to school in pullups and they all looked dumbfounded and said everyday. We have reversed it again and he now lives with us but we wake up everynight at 2am to go to the bathroom. I have to I refuse to let my child smell like the nursing home I used to work in. Persistance and patience will be your payoff in this battle.

Let him be naked, nothing on bottom just a shirt, remove the pull up, keep the potty close, remind every half hour, walk him there if he needs that, get a cute cover for the lid of the toilet, it makes it more inviting. By letting him be naked he learns/feels exactly what his body is warning him of and what will happen next, we know he gets the concept that the poopy goes in the potty but know he needs to feel how to get it there. My oldest has learning disabilities and I did something similar to this, although I wished I would have discovered the completly naked from the waist down and not just underwear. Pull ups offer a false sence of security, you will ahve some mess, get some carpet cleaner, when he has an accident make it no big deal, walk him to the potty and let him know next time you hope he gets there fast enough, have him help clean it up, kids really don't want to mess themselves, but diapers and pull ups restrict just how "dirty" they get. If you have more questions feel free to message!

My daughter just went through that stage. She would wear panties all day until she needed to poop then she would ask for a diaper. I took the diapers away and when she told me she needed to go poop I put her on the toilet. What I found out was that ultimately she was afraid of the feeling of her stool as it was coming out. Instead of being close the body as it would be with underwear or a diaper it has a "hanging feeling" and that was what scared her. She cried on the toilet a couple of times and that made her go poop unitentionally but she realized that it wasn't that big of a deal. When it came out she would be all surprised and think she did a good job. I had to bribe her with suckers. But she could only get one if she actually went on the toilet. I did make her clean out her panties if she didn't quit make it to the toilet she didn't like that very much now she will be 4 in March and she is completely potty trained. I don't know if this feeling is the same that your son may be having but at least it is a thought to help you relate. I hope that I am not out of line. I wish you the best with your family. M. Long

I would definitely seek help from other mothers or professionals who work with children with PPD. As an SLP I worked with children age 0-3, so potty training wasn't an issue I dealt with directly, but I know it crops up. Please get good advise before you begin. Children with PPD can be very stuck in routines, and it takes gentle and careful planning, almost "tricking" him into trying something new until it becomes part of his paradigm. Is your problem getting him to start, or getting him to be consistent with it? If it's the latter, I think your approach could work.

You are also a professional--you know your son better than anyone. Your idea sounds pretty good, especially if you help him with his shoes, and proceed with gentleness and encouragement. Since he can dump his poop in the potty already, he should be able to clean himself up! Perhaps he will realize it's easier to poop in the potty than do all the other work.

Blessings to you!

L.- I have a son with PDD. Which is autism. He was the same way. I figured out that 1 he hated the sound of the toilet flushing so if I promised him to flush the toilet when he was gone it was better and 2 the toilet seat was hurting him (he has major sensory issues) we switched to a soft childs seat then to a soft regular one one. He is 11 and he goes with out a problem. Good Luck, M.

We have a seven year old with PPD in the Asperger's spectrum and it wasn't until he was four that he was #2 trained. I like the naked from waist down suggestion AND get rid of the pullup.

My next advice is when you're trying something (with PPD kids you never can tell which thing will finally CLICK for them!) is to be very consistent--don't throw something new into what you are trying. Stick with your idea. Also with out son, positive reinforcement works so well to this day. If he does have successful BM in the toilet praise praise praise him and maybe allow him to earn something special for going so many times in a row. When our son was poop training he REALLY wanted a Thomas the Tank engine accessory--we allowed him to earn it through positive reinforcement when he was successful on the toilet.

GOOD LUCK

My Brother in law was also extremely stubborn. The only thing that worked for him was to make him clean his own pants when he had an "accident". Once my mother in law made him do that he was potty trained in no time. Expect a lot of resistance though. You will have to really stick to your guns to get him to clean his pants.

Try sitting him on the potty backward. That way he can hold on to the tank and maybe feel more secure. Some children are afraid thta if they sit there too long they may fall in.