Potty Training - Jacksonville,FL

Updated on September 27, 2007
K.A. asks from Jacksonville, FL
15 answers

Here's my problem. My oldest son is 2 1/2, and we're working on potty training. For about a week or two, he didn't have hardly any accidents (maybe one a day). Now he's decided he doesn't want to use the potty anymore. If I put him in underwear, he'll have accident after accident all day long. If I put him in Pull-Ups, he'll use them like a diaper. If I make him sit on the potty, he'll cry and refuse to go. If I offer a special treat (usually a tootsie roll or a sticker... sometimes even a new Matchbox car), he still refuses. Any advise on how to get him interested again?

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So What Happened?

Thanks so much for all the wonderful advice. We decided about a week ago to just stop trying for a while. We still asked him if he needed to go potty, but he always said "no" so we didn't push. Then yesterday, he told me twice that he needed to go. This morning, he woke up and wanted to put on underwear. He wore the same pair until nap time (when I put him back in a Pull-Up). He didn't want underwear after naptime, but that was ok. We're at least working on it again... when he wants to. We'll get there eventually.

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J.B.

answers from Ocala on

Try making it fun! Give him a coloring book, or we have found that the musical potty works wonders. It makes them actually want to sit, and they will wait for the music. And, little boys are harder to train. Patience, patience, and more patience. One day, he will just go.

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A.C.

answers from Sarasota on

I've been where you are before. Isn't it frustrating? The trick I used was to fill a small glass dish or container with M&Ms. This is a big deal because I don't keep sweets in the house. You got one after you used the potty (& washed your hands). It worked, but I think it's all about timing. It may work for your little guy because mine was making advances in potty training and then falling back to Pull Ups. I got rid of the Pull Ups because they are much more expensive than diapers. Between the diapers not being as comfortable as a Pull Up and the promise of a little treat, we got him going on the potty. Pooping, however, was another issue! I upped the treat to two if he pooped. He's seven now and thinks this story is hilarious.

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J.M.

answers from Pensacola on

My advice to you is to back up a little. Give him back his diapers and don't say a word about the potty for at least 3 weeks. My son did the same exact thing and ended up having to go to the doctor because he was "holding" so much that it was
causing severe constipation, bleeding etc. Once we let up he was back to normal. After he seemed to forget about the potty, we pulled it back out and sat it in our bathroom. We didn't say anything, just let him see it. Then out of the blue he decided he wanted to go. So we let him sit on it. and he peed
and you would have thought Santa had visited, he was so happy. He did very well doing #1 and #2. When he was consistently showing interest in the potty we pulled out the underwear and that is pretty much all he wore all day long for a couple weeks. Then he just stopped having accidents.
Best of Luck to you!!
Jen

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F.R.

answers from Pensacola on

Sweet and Simple: Wait until he's ready!
Parents tend to be a little pushy when it comes to potty training as if they kids will end up starting 4th grade wearing a diaper. Get over the pressure to have him "trained" early and go with the signs your son is putting out there. They are all individual people and move at their own pace. Your job is to guide him, not push him.

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K.W.

answers from Panama City on

I never even attempted to potty train my boys until they were three. At that age it was a breeze, took about a week. My daughter on the other hand potty trained HERSELF at 15 months old. Now there will be other mothers and doctors who will give you all kinds of tricks and things to do to force the issiue on your son. You have to decide what kind of stress you want.It also stresses your son out. Don't force him to grow up so fast.
K.

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E.S.

answers from Honolulu on

I would say he isnt ready and its best you just back up before he thinks the potty is just a bad experience. I potty trained my son when he turned 3 and it was easy, because by then he was ready. We had been working on it off and on since he was 18 months and by 3 it only took a few weeks.
Its just one thing you cant push them to do till they want to do it :)

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M.H.

answers from Jacksonville on

Hi K.,

As a mother of 3 (2boys and 1 girl), unless you have to get him pt for day care, I would back off and give him some time. This is a big transition and he may need more time. The more you make it a big deal, the more it becomes a stressor and could possibly turn into a power struggle - which is the last thing you want to create as a dynamic between the two of you.

If you have the freedom to give him time, I would say let it go for a little while and try again in a few weeks. It may take 6 months or so. The bigget lesson I have learned with my children is that raising children is not a textbook model...they each have their own path that may not be in line with the one I had in my head.

I understand there are parents who are very strict about pt on a schedule not lead by the child. I'm sure all the methods work in the end and no one is really scarred for life...the child lead method worked really well for my children and I.

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S.W.

answers from Jacksonville on

I am in the midst of this with my daughter and know how you feel. What I have had to do with her is set a rule. Just one! She has to earn her clothes. If she has an accident, she loses the lower half of her clothes for the rest of the day (exception for when we leave the house). I no longer use pull-ups because we cannot afford them. I found really cheap training pants online and bought a bunch of those for over night.

Just remember that every child is different and has to be rewarded in a different way. Find what it is your sone likes most and use that as a reward. Acknowledge when it is your fault for an accident (didn't hear him asking to go pee, washing dishes and didn't get there on time), but remind him to hold it as long as he can.

You can make it through this! I see a light at the end of my tunnel, though it seems like it will take forever to get there, I know I will make it!

May God bless you today and everyday!

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K.T.

answers from Sarasota on

2 and 1/2 is a bit early for him to "get it" and any further pushing on your part will just cause more back peddling. My daughter did the same thing. And little girls usually get it before little boys do. I spent the summer when she was 2 and 1/2 giving her nudie time and as long as nothing was on her, she went every time in her potty. As soon as I put something on her, she'd use it no matter if it was panties or a pull up, etc. She was finally fully trained about 6 to 7 months later. Good luck.

K.

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E.K.

answers from Fort Walton Beach on

When I was potty training my son, I made a game of it. I would put cheerios in the toilet, have him stand up on his "aiming chair" (the stool) and target, aim, and shoot the "bad guys" (the cheerios). He loved it!

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T.B.

answers from Jacksonville on

I have girls i know it is a little different. I just went through this with my three year old. She was three in april and i was stressing because she showed no interest in going to the potty. I have had a potty around since she was 1. She would never tell me when she was wet or pooped and seemed very attached to the pull-up. We moved to these only at about 2 3/4 years old. I found that the trick is to put it into their hands. I tried to stop stressing and constantly nagging. I just reminded her several times a day "do you want to us the potty?" and "do you want to wear you tinker bell panties" one day she just got it. She wanted panties. We did have accidents for a few days but after a week she was not having any accidents. She was doing this at the end of may, one month after her third birthday. I have read in several articles that a childs brain has to be able to formulate a plan when learning and accomplishing some things. Sometimes their little brain hasn't got to that point. I think something just clicked with her. She has even stopped wearing pull ups at night. This was her decision. She has had a few accidents but none in about a month. I think we get over obsessed with potty training at 2 years old. I think three is a more reasonable age. Now don't get me wrong i have friends who's children were pt at 18 months,night trained at 2. But i have one friend who spanked her child every time he had an accident and he is 4 and still having problems. I would just take a break and give him some control over the situation. I don't think you should take away his diapers or pullips or other things if he isn't ready. I saw one response say to use his clothes as a reward. I'm sorry but that is crazy to take away their clothes as punishment for having an accident. Potty training or learning as i like to call it, is not about punishment. I found that if i got upset or my husband she fought it more. Give him choices and if he wants to wait a little longer go with it i think it will pay off in the end. Just remember all kids are in underwear by kindergarten!!
I wish you the best!!

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J.M.

answers from Jacksonville on

My daughter did the same thing-she did great for a while and then suddenly regressed. What finally worked for me was reverse psychology-I told her that she wasn't allowed to use the potty anymore and put it up high where she could see it but not get to it. I put her back in diapers and told her that potties were only for big girls. Within a week she was completely trained. Good luck!

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S.A.

answers from Tallahassee on

K.,

I was a SAHM as well. When I was potty training my boy. I would let him run around without his underwear (because I got tired of washing all those urine soaked undies) He tended to run to the potty more without anything on him than he did when he was wearing underwear or a pull up. (YES There were times he used the floor to pee on-but he learned quick)

I don't think wearing a pull up is helpful in anyway(unless at night in the first stages of potty training)

Have you gotten him a fun step stool? You can get a spongebob, or diego step stool at wal-mart. They are in the potty training isle where all the baby-depot stuff is.

Really and truly, bribing him will get you nowhere. You have to watch his schedule to get in tune to when he needs to go. Try every 30 minutes, then gradually build up to about ever 2-3 hours. You don't even have to say a word to him, just put him on the potty.

Now my son is 4 months shy of his 3rd birthday. He can take his underwear off, use the potty and pull his underwear back up! Its a wonderful thing! AND he doesn't wet the bed. He actually gets up at night to use the bathroom if he needs to pee! (I trained him at night too) Its a constant round the clock vigil K.. But you CAN do it and so can he!

BEST OF LUCK!

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T.S.

answers from Jacksonville on

Hig Kim:
I received and reviewed your "potty training" concerns. While this can be a very frustrating period of time, I found that if I did not make a big deal out of it, then my son would not be stressed over it. Unfortunately, I was not able to be a stay at home mom when my son was 2 1/2 years old, and he was being potty trained while at day care. However, we reinforced what he was learning at home.

Some things we found to be fun was to take some Cheerios and put them in the potty. Then he would try an tinkle on them, or he would try and make bubbles. You might also try to some fun food colors to see how the yellow changes the colors.

In addition, we had a certificate for "pooping in the potty". We put it up on his door so he could see it and really be excited about it.
We also had an award system. Make a chart that can be put up on his wall and everytime he does a great job, he can write it on his chart. At the end of the week, you come up with some type of a reward system that both you and he is comfortable with. You can even make it on a point system, but if he fails to use the potty when he should, then you deduct points from his total. This will not only get him involved in this, but it can also begin to teach him numbers and simple math skills.

If he had an accident, we did not make a big deal out of it, but helped him to clean up and try again. I found that the more my son was involved in this process, the better he was doing. In addition, I have learned that children perform better when they see things in writing and know what is expected of them.

I believe there is a teachers learning store on San Jose Blvd near the Publix and this is a great place to find simple charts that you can use dry erase markers on. Let your son write on his chart.

At night, we always put a pamper on him and we would track how many nights we stayed dry. When he began to stay dry for several nights in a row, we would let hiim wear his big boys to bed (with protection under him in the event of an accident).
When he wore his big boys to bed, we would get him up before we went to bed and take him to the bathroom. If I got up during the night, for whatever reason, I could check on him, and if he was dry, I would take him to the bathroom again.

We did not allow him to drink water or anything else after 6:00-7:00 pm, but made sure he well hydrated prior to our cut off time.

We made a lot of games out it, and eventually, he was using the potty when expected. In fact, he was not even wetting the bed at night once he began to wear his big boys to bed. My son is 11 years old now, and to this day, we have never had any issues with bed wetting or accidents.

The key is to make a game out of it. My son was not to keen on actual potty chairs, but there was seats that can go onto the big pottys to help out little bottoms.

One more thing, have a stuffed animal that is only associated with using the potty, and tell your darling little boy that his stuffed animal friend uses the potty and let him take it in with him.
I learned that anytime you can make a game out of things, small children love it and they want to please you.

Let me know who things go with this.

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M.H.

answers from Sarasota on

My son is almost 2.5 and no where near potty training. He has no interest in it at all! I just keep reading that forcing and pushing is the worst you can do. Stop bringing it up and give him a rest. I think that since he had been potty training already, the reverse psychology is a great idea! That is one thing I think will work for my son when the time comes.

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