Potty Training 3 Year Old Dd

There are three things you can't make a child do, eat, sleep, and eliminate. You can put food in front of them (you could even stuff it in their mouth), but you can't make them swallow/or prevent them from throwing up. You can confine them to a bed for hours on end, but you can't make them fall asleep. You can tie them to the potty, but you can't make the pee or poop come out.
I had a friend who did the three day potty training with her son, and she REFUSED to go back to diapers even when it was clear he was not on the right path to being potty trained. What she did instead was clean up accidents three or four times a day for about six months. He even pooped in the climber at Burger King!
I understand the feeling that you have to get this done for school, but a preschool that's really worth it's salt isn't going to have that policy because they will have a TRUE understanding of preschoolers. Some children are not ready until they are almost four - maybe they can hold it for three hours or more, maybe they can pull down their pants by themselves, maybe they can tell you when they need to go... But if they're too scared to sit and go, then they aren't ready. Usually the emotional piece it the last to come.
My son wouldn't go poop on the potty, I tried and tried. Telling him there were no more diapers, sitting him regularly on the potty, promising treats or toys... NOPE. Not gonna do it! He held it in for three days, and that was when I KNEW we were done pushing the issue. I'd rather have changed poopy diapers than end up in the ER with a severe blockage. He was almost four by the time he finally did it, and he did it all by himself when I was out of town and his dad was busy in the garage, then came out and announced it!
You can continue to push and bribe and insist, but she will only do it when she is ready. A child can feel your urgency on the issue, and usually uses that against you. I would take a "whatever" approach, and put it in your head that you may be putting school off for another year.

The 3-day approach may have intimidated her a bit. She's probably not so much afraid to pee as she is to make a mistake.

It sounds like she hasn't really connected the dots yet between sensations and what to do with them. I'm guessing she's actually not ready yet. Kids don't reach the necessary physical, nervous, and emotional maturity by the calendar – they are each individuals. It's really not a matter of your kids "giving in," it's a matter of each child being able to have a working relationship with urges and outcomes. When a child is ready, she wants to make this developmental step, and rewards or punishments are not needed.

Poop training is often an entirely separate process – the sensations are different, it often takes longer and is more effortful, and sometimes kids are alarmed by the sense that they've lost a piece of themselves.

Here's a wonderful, informative website you might find helpful. It gives a few variations on"readiness" checklists, plus tips on various training strategies, the best ages to start them, and the advantages and disadvantages of each approach: http://www.parentingscience.com/toilet-training-readiness...

i have 3 1/2 girl/boy twins and we are potty training now..... my girl we fought and fought for her to sit.... we would put big girl underware on in the morning and every 2 hrs would have her sit..... she did not go all the time but i did the every 2 hours for a week..... then she decided to go.... yipee.....then came the pooping...would always go in her diaper at nap...I could actually time it...from the time i shut the door to her going was ten minutes......!!! she decided one day to try the "big" potty with the training seat all by her self and never went back to the potty chair....!!!!! all in do time !!!! My son is a whole different story !!!! will wear big boy undies but will not wee/poop on his potty !!!!!! Hang in there !!!! I do not know of anyone who wore diapers in college as my mom says !!!!!

http://parentingtouchstones.com/01/10-techniques-to-toile...

This is a little late, and my apologies.

My son didn't start training until he was 3 2/3 yrs old... he wasn't ready and it's his body... argh. First he was able to pee, but if I made a big deal, he would refuse. We tried to pressure RE poo, and he stopped all-together, said he was scared, got constipated... blahblah. It wasn't until I gave up, put him back in pullups fulltime and said he needed to at least poop while in the bathroom and no other room -- we changed his pullup and flushed his poop with him in the bathroom each time for around 2 weeks and THEN he finally went. But! This process only took 2 months:) He's going into PreK so you can imagine my angst since April!!!!!!

My daughter started at 20 mos, but didn't finish until she was almost 3 -- she took 15 mos for the process. Early but LONG!

I KNOW KNOW KNOW it's hard, but she's still young and isn't what you want or need to hear, and I felt the same way!:( But if you tone it down, perhaps she'll step up to the potty while you're not looking!:)

Also, I know some schools say they won't "let" kids into their age-group unless completely potty trained, but surely if you speak with them closer to the time, they will fall-back and assist -- if they are stubborn with you, perhaps look for a school that's more supportive of the basics.

GOOD LUCK GOOD LUCK AND MUCH PATIENCE!:)

Updated

The new panties are quite the incentive too!! But there are some great video tips on training your little one at http://www.toddlerbedandmore.com. Best of luck!

Do not give up. I would let her wear a diaper for nap time and bedtime so that she can go #2 in there for now if she is more comfortable with that. This is more difficult for most kids. Mine just started going #2 more by accident on the potty once she was already going to pee regularly so focus on that part for now.
One of mine used to hold her pee until she would run to the potty and rarely made it in time. I used a portable potty and moved it around to be near her wherever she was playing. Sounds gross but I just kept a towel under it. She did much better when it was close by as a reminder. After 2 days, I started moving the potty closer to the bathroom each time she used it successfully. By the 3rd or 4th day, she was going into the bathroom to pee with no problems. Continue the praise and celebration.
Good luck!

B.
Mom of Twins
www.babybearsden.com

try running the sink while she tries to pee ... sometimes it's the sound of the pee hitting the water or get a noise machine that will distract her ... it's a WHOLE new thing all together and tons of different noises. Remember in a diaper it's practically soundless!