Another Potty Training Question - Oregon City,OR

Updated on July 10, 2011
K.G. asks from Oregon City, OR
7 answers

About a month ago I was complaining that my 3 year old wasn't going on the potty, we have had some success since then, but we are struggling with pooping on the potty. My difficulty is this...she has pooped on the potty probably 6-10 times in the past month. There was no trauma surrounding any of these incidents; e.g. constipation, pain, etc. However, for about the last week to two weeks she has taken to going in her pants. If catch her "in the act" and quickly tell her that she needs to go on the potty, she will run away until she is done. I'm frustrated because it no longer seems like "an accident" and instead she is choosing to go in her pants. I'm not sure what to do. Maybe I've been going the wrong route so far, but so far I've restricted her "princess dress" wearing to 1 dress a day, meaning if she poops in her pants, she has to change clothes and can't have another dress that day. She loves her dresses, so this seemed like a good motivator, but nothing to extreme or punishment like. It's not working at all.
Does anyone have any suggestions? The laundry is starting to pile up.
Thanks.
K.
PS. She seems to do better if she doesn't have anything on her bottom half. Though the other day she went to her room and put underpants on before pooping in them. Sigh

What can I do next?

  • Add yourAnswer own comment
  • Ask your own question Add Question
  • Join the Mamapedia community Mamapedia
  • as inappropriate
  • this with your friends

More Answers

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

P.M.

answers from Portland on

It's really common for poop training to come later, sometimes by several months. The sensations are different, more effort and time are generally required, it often includes some amount of discomfort, either from the movement itself or from sitting long enough to finish the deed (toilet-seat pressure and/or tingly legs).

And while the urge to pee is hard to hold back once it hits, the normal peristaltic action that helps push out a poop is very easy to disrupt with just about any sort of distraction, just as normal breathing is very easy to disrupt when there is emotional tension or excitement. And not even all adults can 'produce' at will – I seldom can.

So be patient. She might get the most success if her BMs are pretty regular and you can put hier on the potty when she's most likely to have a bowel movement. Keep it relaxed, maybe read to her, and if she's 'tried' or sat patiently for several minutes, let her go play. She'll get there eventually.

Since she'll put on panties for pooping, suggest instead that she put on a diaper instead to avoid the laundry problem. I've known several families that allowed their kids to use diapers exclusively for pooping. They had no problems with the kids getting confused or regressing. The children just had more time to figure out the connections between sensation and 'outcome,' and when they were ready, they happily used the toilet.

2 moms found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

S.H.

answers from Honolulu on

She's not ready.
It happens in stages.

2 moms found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

D.T.

answers from Detroit on

My guys are 3 1/2 and still wear diapers! UGH!! I have tried EVERYTHING! Every book, bootcamp...just everything! I do not know what to do either!! I am told that "when they are really ready, they will do it", and that is what I am living on!
Good Luck!!

1 mom found this helpful

C.M.

answers from St. Louis on

Ask her if she wants to wear a diaper because that is where babies poop. If she says no, gently explain she needs to go poop on the potty. If she poops in her underwear again, go back to diapers and (not mad) tell her that when she is ready to poop on the potty, she can go back to wearing underwear.

Just an idea!

1 mom found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

V.M.

answers from Cleveland on

sounds like she is a little stubborn, your princess dress motivation seems spot on to me. regression like this is kind of typical for that age. stay consistant and know that it is a stage she will move through, not many kids wear diapers to highschool. Could you put the ante a bit and come up with some new motivatiom, something positive ---- actually do you have a female freind that could call and pretend to be Cinderella or something to tell her how great she's been doing peeing but now she needs to work on pooping in the potty and what a big girl she is praise praise praise. tHere are enough princess out there she coudl get a call everytime she actually pooped for a week.

my only other suggestion is that if she is the least bit regular ( my son would poop 10 mins into dinner EVERY Night) then you can anticpate and have her in the bathroom. I actually kept a freestanding baby potty in my kitchen because our only bathroom was upstairsa dna i wasn't goign to run up everytime for every false alarm.

good luck mama, you are both doing fine!

A.H.

answers from Portland on

Have you tried reading board books or young kid books that talk about how everyone poops and it's okay to poop in the potty? Maybe she is ashamed of pooping or maybe she is scared to poop in the potty. I've heard some kids think they are losing part of themselves if they poop in the potty.

Regression is actually very normal for that age, plus pooping in the potty usually is successfully achieved many months after peeing.
I agree with Peg as well (even the diaper for pooping, seems a lot less work for you and when she is ready to poop in the potty she will :))

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

A.S.

answers from Eugene on

We have been going through the same thing. My dd would wait to poop until she had a diaper on ready for bed. I was worried yesterday going to a pool-what would happen. I told her if she pooped in the pool, they wouldn't allow us back-she sat down and went-after 2 tries, before we left. She knows the little tummy ache she gets right before she needs to go. Try talking to your daughter about it. When she does make it too the toilet-we talk about how much easier that is then cleaning up a mess. Motivation like the pool or dress is good thing. They can do it-it just takes a lot of patience from us. I have also pulled out one skittles or M&M if she makes it.

For Updates and Special Promotions
Follow Us

Related Questions