Potty Accidents Out of Anger?

Make her clean herself up. that way the behavior isn't getting ANY of your attention. Direct her to hte bathroom to take her wet clothing off, and to the wipes to clean herself up, and to her bedroom to get new clothing. Don't do ANY of the work for her. When she wets, calmly say 'go to the bathroom and take your wet clothes off, clean up, then go to your bedroom and get clean clothes'. Make her do it, and when she realizes she won't get any of your attention for it, she will stop. And if she doesn't, then she'llstill be getting the lesson of doing it herself, and not any of your attention.

If you don't want this to continue, make it HER problem, not yours. What I'm saying is, have her clean it up (teach her how, don't use harmful chemicals, just soap and water, give her towels or scrub brushes, show her how to use them and get the area clean), then have her clean herself in the bathroom using wetwipes or a washcloth, and finally, spend a little time alone in her room or timeout area. The key is to remain calm, don't let her think it is upsetting you. Limit your interaction with her when this happens, and become very "business-like", "Looks like you peed. You will need to clean that up." And walk away.

Before it happens again, explain to her that this is what you are going to do now. Tell her, "you are a big girl now and you go pee in the toilet. If you choose to go pee in your clothes, you will clean it up. When you are done cleaning it up, you will have a timeout. I will not be doing it anymore." Say it very matter-of-factly and she will get the message. Then, follow through. It won't take long and this will stop. Good luck! You can do it!!

I think it is her way of having some kind of control. When she is mad at you, you have probably told her "no" and because she can't express with words that she is mad at you she does the only think she knows to do, go potty in her panties. I think if you make the accident her problem by not getting angry (which I know is very hard to do)but instead say without emotion something like, "oh dear, you had an accident. I suppose you should get some new panties." And then if she made a mess on the floor show her how to clean up the mess. She is looking for your reaction. If you don't react angrily but instead as though it doesn't effect you then she will probably stop because her tactic is not working. To help with the anger side of things for you, recognize that her actions doesn't have to affect you and that she can be responsible for her actions even if she is only 2. What better age to teach her that her actions have consequences! Just think how much easier it will be if she understands that now than if she is trying to figure it out when she is 13. Think of it as an investment in her character building. Keep up the good work, Mom. Your job is hard and tiring but it is well worth every minute of effort you put forth. Don't quit. Don't give up. Keep moving forward. It will get easier if you put forth the effort NOW while they are young and small enough to pick up.

My son did this to me once, a few weeks after being potty trained. We were in a grocery store- I got a cart with a car in the front for him, but he wouldn't stay in it. He wanted to have his feet stick out, so I told him he would have to walk. He got mad, I didn't give in... and then he made a funny face and looked down at his pants. I knew right away what he had done on purpose. Then he started crying that he needs to change, and I told him no. Luckily I was done shopping and ready to pay... but it did make it seem long. He continued to whine the whole time, but I made him sit in it until we got home (almost a half hour). I just got a plastic bag from the store and put it under him in the carseat to keep it clean. He wanted to be carried and I told him no- he was too dirty and Mommy couldn't hold him until he was clean. He was very upset by the fact that he got nothing out of doing that, and had to sit in it. From the begining I made him change himself if he had an accident, so just making him do it himself wasn't enough to teach him not to do that again. When we got home I let him change, and it has never happened again. I also stayed very calm the whole time and gave him no reaction- which I know only made him more upset, but taught him a lesson to. Though it was a little embarassing in the store ignoring a kid crying that he is wet and needs to be changed... I know people were looking at me like I was neglecting him and should be doing something, but they didn't understand how he got wet, so I didn't worry about what they were thinking.

Put her back in diapers and tell her she can start wearing underwear again when she stops peeing in her pants. Say it matter-of-factly without emotion (this is just they way things are). If you react, she wins. Just a suggestion.
Good luck!

Yes, my 3 yr old daughter did that too. All you can do is give totally NO RESPONSE, I mean NO EMOTION when she has an accident. Just matter-of-factly take her to the bathroom, clean her up, tell her she can't wear her pretty panties/outfit because she got these dirty, and send her on her way. If she sees that having an accident makes you angry, makes you emotional (sad, angry, frustrated, etc), now SHE has power over you and obviously knows to use it to effect. I think this is the biggest thing you can do in this situation. And no discussion about her being a big girl, knowing better, etc., because that is rewarding her with attention(both negative and positive attention count as desired attention at this age).

Good luck!!!!!

Very good suggesting about putting her back into diapers. You can also put her clothes that she's soiled into timeout for a short period of time. You don't want to break her spiritm you just want to show her who runs things.