So i wanna start by thanking everyone that offered advice to me earlier this week on the lil boy we were looking to take in. So i have spoken to the mother of the child and she wants to sign over her rights so we can adopt this sweet child but I'm not real sure if it can be done this way in arkansas. I have not spoken to a lawyer yet i can't get in to see him until end of next week. Can someone just pick a family to adopt their child? Is this legal. The is staying with the grandmother but she cant handle him and the mom wants to sign over rights but does not want him going into the system. This is all happening very fast and im not finding any straight forward answers on how to go about this. My husband and I are very willing to take this child into our home and give him a forever family. But i don't have thousands of dollars to adopt a child. Does anyone know what kind of court fees I would be looking at if we did this without having a adoption agency do this? Nothing is set in stone yet and I believe the mom is on drugs and is pretty wishy washy from day to day but my husband and I want this boy as our son. Where do i start?
Yes, it can be done this way in pretty much any of the US. But you need an adoption lawyer. If it's not considered and "in family" adoption, the fees can be steep.
You need to listen.
IF this child is a ward of the state you cannot just adopt him. The mother DOES NOT HAVE ANY LEGAL RIGHTS TO HIM.
She can ask the child welfare office to consider you but they will choose a family looking to adopt that is already in their foster care system first.
YOU MUST DISCUSS THIS WITH THE CHILD WELFARE WORKER.
There is no need for an attorney at all. If the state picks you they will pay ALL the fees and it will be very easy. If they pick you. There is nothing you can do but talk to them and ask them if you can become a foster parent to him through kinship with the goal to adopt him.
You should have been on the phone with them Thursday or Friday at the latest. They are the ones who will be deciding this child's future. NOT THE MOTHER OR GRANDMOTHER.
I don't know why you have not taken my advice and are still asking these questions.
It is very very very simple and it is cut and dried. You cannot do anything you are asking about.
No one has any authority over this child except the state and you still have not called them.
If you do plan on adopting, you will need a homestudy. That might be something you can work on while you are waiting to talk to a lawyer. I would start calling adoption agencies to see if they can do this for you. Not sure who else you would call. Good luck. My daughter is adopted and it is such a wonderful blessing!
In WA, there are a few different options for folks who want to stay outside of the system:
-Durable Power of Attorney
-Temporary Non Parental Custody + Parenting Plan
-Full Severance of Parental Rights + Adoption
I've been able to see a family law attorney for a free consultation. She outlined our options, gave a background of what she could offer and her win rates, and talked over a payment plan. It was an illuminating forty-five minutes and I understood our standing so much better.
I would definitely start by speaking with a good adoption attorney. Laws differ from state to state, and you want to do everything in accordance with the law. You can send me a private message if you'd like the name of our adoption attorney. He's in New York, but he is known throughout the country and knows reputable adoption attorneys in many states. When we were in the process of adopting our daughter, he found our birthmother an attorney in the state where she lived when she was unable to find one herself. Good luck! Adoption is wonderful!
If the child is techically in CPS care, it shouldn't cost you as the state will cover the costs. You will most likely have to complete a home study where a social worker meets with you, reviews various documents (finances, vital records, mortgage or rent records, employment verification), receives personal references for you, and visits with you in your home. She will then write a report that recommends allowing you to adopt the child. They may also require some on-line parenting courses. You might check out the website for Gladney or for adoption.com...both are good sources of info. You may also want to contact either Catholic Charities or Lutheran Family Services, as they also can help with adoption even if you are not of their particular faith.
Can you get into see a different attorney sooner like Monday?
I would be hesitant to take the child in BEFORE you meet w/the attorney.
What if you welcome him into your home then she changes her mind a few months later. So difficult for the child & sad for you, too.
If you do take the child in right away w/o speaking to the attorney first, take the note she gives you signing her rights way to the child & have it notorized right away. See if you have a mobile notary in your area.
If the child goes into the system, it is my understanding you very well my have access to that child.
Adoption does cost a lot of $. Not sure that her signing her child to you would alleviate that.
You definitely would want to proceed immediately to finalize & legalize the adoption of this young boy.
My friend started an adoption (took the child in first), bio mom changed her mind & the social worker stated that child was put into the wrong category: foster care as opposed to adoption. It was sad for her & child.
Proceed cautiously & legally.
I commend you & hope this gets straightened out immediately for you!
Edit: If you already know her to be wishy-washy, there is nothing that says she would not change her mind once the boy is living with you. Hence the need for legal documents to be drawn up. Keep at it. I'm praying for you!
K. I am so Happy for you that this mother has agreed to sign over her rights! I am assuming that he is not a ward of the state, he has been staying with the Grandma informally, yes?? I think a mother (who has not given up any rights) can pick a family to adopt a child. Make sure you have a lawyer with experience in these situations! Good Luck, I'm praying all goes well!
