One Very Angry 18 Month Old

My daughter did similar things around that age. Anytime anything didn't go exactly her way she would take it out angrily on either herself or others around her. I finally asked her pediatrician because it got so bad that her little forehead stayed black and blue from beating it on the hardwood floors so often. Then she would beat it harder because she was angry that it hurt. I really thought something was wrong for her to be doing that!! And then the biting began. And she would leave marks on herself for days!! It was SO aweful. What her Dr. told me, was that if you react to it (or anyone else in the room with you reacts to it) then you are only encouraging the behavior. He told me to put her on a soft mat where she couldn't beat herself or hurt self in another room without saying anything or acknowledging it AT ALL and let her do it!! We did that, and within days, there were major improvements!! Within a week, the behavior had completely stopped!! Its hard to just let them throw the fit, but it really did work quickly for us. Just thought I'd let ya know what her Dr. said and see if that would help ya!! He said some kids just don't quite know how to deal with their anger yet and so they resort to this and they need to learn that it won't get them attention to hurt themselves!! Good Luck!!

~M.

I empathize with your situation. I recommend keeping a behavior journal and perhaps you will see a pattern of events that are triggering her outbursts. I had to do this with my son and it helped a lot. I soon discovered, after keeping the journal, that if I limited certain stimuli in his daily life, he was a more controlled, calm child.

Good luck :)

Ok, here's the scoop...take her to the doctor and have her ears and eyes checked. I have one son that was prone to ear infections and when his ears were infected (more often than not) he would get agressive because he was frustrated that he couldn't hear. Since he got his tubes in his ears and he can hear and is infection free, he hasn't been any more hostile than any normal 16 month old. I also have a 5 year old that when he was 2 he was very hostile. One day I noticed that his left eye was crossing in and took him to an eye doctor that specializes in small children. It turns out that he was almost completely blind in his left eye and his vision was slightly impaired in his right eye. Since he got his glasses the hostility has gone. Kids at that age can't tell you when something hurts or if they're having trouble seeing or hearing. They tend to get frustrated easily and have no means of expressing pain or frustration so they tend to lash out. Another thing is that she may have picked up the behavior at daycare from the other kids. I'm sure if that is the case that she wasn't exposed to it over night so she won't be cured of it over night. Here's a little trick that I use on my 16 month old. When he hits or pulls hair, I take hold of the wrist of the hand that he's doing it with, then he will try to hit me with the other hand and I will take hold of that hand. There's no need to hold hard or squeeze...just hold enough that he can't get loose...about 15 to 20 seconds later he'll start to cry and I'll let him go and tell him "hands are for helping not for hurting". Once he's turned loose, he'll walk away and go about his business. The thing about kids, especially toddlers, they don't like to be made to be still. It's ok if they choose to sit still, but they don't like to be MADE to sit still. Talk to the doctor and give my meathod a try and see if it helps you any.

Slapping the top of the hand works well....and so does a bar of soap in the mouth. She may be a little too young for that, but you never know.

At that age its very hard for children to tell you whats bothering them. she may be getting upset b/c she cant do something or you arnt giving her what she wants, the best thing is to talk to her calmly and look for patterns. doeds she get upset when she cant get a toy to work or if someone is to close to her or not close enough? good luck it will get better!

This sounds familiar. My son has seemed to have a temper since about 18 months to a year. He was born with GERD so we alwasy attributed it to pain and being spoiled .... he is now 6 and we are currently undergoing testing for Asperger's syndrome. No I am not suggesting that your daughter has Asperger's but when a child hurts themself it is usually a good sign that you should at the very least discuss this with your pediatrician. We ignored this for such a very long time with my son and he did get violent with other children and adults alike. He is also a very loving and kind child who shares better than my daughter or my nieces and nephews.....most of the time!!! It is like something inside him snaps over certain things. Anyway...I would discuss this with your pediatrician! Hope things improve for you soon.
~~K.

J....first thing you need to do is bring up this situation up with her dr and tell him your concerns. Second when she acts up like that firmly state to her that how she is acting is not the way to act and i would stick her little behind in bed til she can act right, if shes alittle over a year old you can still stick her in a playpen and let her be til shes over her tantrum and cries it out.

Has anything out of the norm happened to her? Anything tramatic? Change in living routine? Take her to the doctor and ask for a check up and voice your concerns with the pediatrician. It never hurts to be too cautious. She might have add or adhd. let us know how it goes.