Nursing Through the Night

Rry reading the Sleep Easy Solution. There is a section in there on night weaning when co sleeping. Good luck.

2 questions...

Are you co-sleeping? if so, she needs to be in her own bed if you don't want her nursing throughout the night

Do you nurse her at night until she drifts off to sleep? if so, that is the problem right there. She falls asleep by nursing so when she wakes up (as EVERYONE does, even adults) throughout the night, she has no idea how to just roll over and fall asleep. She is NOT waking up to eat or drink-- she is waking to be soothed back to sleep. At her age, there is no reason for her to need nurishment in the middle of the night. When it's 3AM and you are exhausted, it is very, very difficult to tell her no -- because if you do that means there will be lots of crying and no one will be sleeping. But if she is taught to fall asleep on her own without nursing, then there is a better chance she will be able to learn to fall back to sleep throughout the night, too. If you want to keep the evening time nursing, change your routine so you are not doing it as the last thing before she drifts off. For example, nurse her, THEN give her a bath, THEN read her a book, and then teach her to fall asleep on her own without you rocking or nursing or any other crutch that she will look for in the middle of the night

you need to make the decision to stop the nursing. It may entail a week of rough nights but if you want to stop it, it is up to you. Offer a pacifier, a bottle of water, a sippy of water, but if you do not actively stop placing her on your breast then it will not stop. She's not forcing herself upon you, you are allowing it.

Her night feeding NEED to be cut off. She's too old and is taking advantage. I know because my daughter did the same thing. Your daughters "need" for night feedings ended a while ago. I had to do the "cry it out" with my daughter at 12 months. Unfortunately, she was pretty set in her ways and it took a little while, but she's also very strong willed. Maybe your little one will adjust more quickly. It might be to your advantage to switch her to a bottle with pumped milk, and then eventually to whole milk. You need your rest. Good luck!

I think it's great that you are nursing her!

When I wanted to manage feedings, I had a lot of luck with letting my husband help. We did not cosleep, so it was easy for him to go in when the kids woke, pat them a bit and then leave. In less than a week, they each learned that they wouldn't be nursed and they stopped even making noise when they woke.

Good luck!

"she does not nurse during the day"

^ she may be trying to make up for this by nursing more at night.

try offering more nursing/cuddling sessions during the day. (it may not be for nutritional needs, she might just want to be close to you more.) have you recently started working/ being away from her more than usual?

Why isn't she nursing through the daytime? Do you work? IF you are working and are NOT nursing her during the day because you are working, it would make sense that she is not nursing during the day. Your absence during the day would explain why she is marathon nursing at night...because she misses you and can only get you during the night. Is she eating solids? At 16 months, she should be eating, breakfast, snack, lunch, snack, dinner and perhaps something else before bedtime, like a bowl of oatmeal, or Cream of Wheat, or a cup of chopped fruit...maybe some yogurt. She is NOT waking up during the night for hunger, thirst maybe, but not hunger and if you are feeding her a small meal just before bedtime, she should not be waking up during the night. Is she able to drink from a cup or sippy cup? IF she is thirsty, she should be offered WATER in a cup or sippy cup. It is likely that she is wanting to nurse because she needs you for something that she isn't getting from you at any other time. Babies nurse for hunger, thirst, and comfort. At 16 months of age, however, she should be encouraged to sleep through the night and discouraged from nursing at all hours of the night. Begin giving her water in a sippy cup and nurse her only at the times you want to nurse. Be patient....this may take time for her to adjust to the new routine but whatever you do, do not begin nursing her through the night again. Hugs, cuddles, and kisses and water in a cup but no nursing.

are you co-sleeping?
if you are, I really don't know what to say...
if you are not:
nurse before bed and if/when she wakes again, simply REFUSE and give a sippy of water or milk. she will cry, but say "no ____at night. sleep time. dark outside. sleeping. everybody sleeping (then list WHO is sleeping!)"

show her the sun and show her the moon/stars/dark.
tell her you only nurse at night before bed and in the morning when she wakes up. tell her this all.day.long.

get your husband to help with this for a week.

I think it's great that you're still nursing a 16 month old! =) I nursed my daughter for 25 months so I know what it's like to nurse a toddler all night long! I have some helpful links for you. In particular, Dr. Jay Gordon's night weaning plan is applicable if you're cosleeping. He thinks you can nightwean and still cosleep. I don't know if you're cosleeping and want to continue to do so, so I thought I'd throw that out there.

Here are the links:

http://www.drjaygordon.com/development/ap/sleep.asp

http://kellymom.com/bf/weaning/weaning-night.html

I hope these help!

Wow, sorry! I'm not sure how helpful this will be, but my suggestion would be that you just have to be strong and NOT nurse her at night - you're already lacking sleep, so a week or two more while you wean her from night feedings shouldn't be too terrible. I nursed each of mine for 14 months, but I weaned them from the night time nursing around 7 or 8 months. I just stopped doing it and they fussed for a week or two but were fine. If you're having sleep issues, I HIGHLY recommend "Good Night, Sleep Tight" by Kim West - I used her techniques (adjusted slightly to my comfort zone) and they worked wonderfully - it's a great book and you do not have to read the whole book to be able to implement it because it's split up into different sections according to your needs. I know how hard getting any reading in can be with two little ones - mine are 18 months appart (now 4 and 2.5)! I can tell you though that they are GREAT sleepers and have been since I found that book when my oldest was about 11 month old - we did everything wrong with her as she was our first! We implemented the techniques with #2 at around 6-7 months, plus we did a lot different from the beginning, too! Sorry I went off on a tangent there ..... good luck, I hope it all works out!

16 months old. It is time to just refuse it. If she is not nursing during the day. She obviously does not need it anymore. Move on and let her have a cup. She will be ok.

I went through the same thing with my daughter at 14 months. I ended up weaning her cold turkey. It was the biggest mistake. I wish I had someone tell me that this phase would soon pass. She was just trying to tell me that she missed me and we were too active during the day. She was also going through a growth spurt. If I could have done it over again, I would have slowed down and cuddled all day and offerred to nurse a lot during the day! Hang in there! She is working through something and needs extra attention right now. As soon as it resolves, she'll separate again. Try not to rush her. I still have to repeat that montra with my daughter "Don't rush me, Mom. I'll do it when I'm ready." She is 3 now and it is just her personality.

Google the Dr. Sears method for gentle weaning. It definately worked for us. Mine was 18 mos. old and like you I desperately needed sleep, was getting more stupid by the day lol!! the long and the short of it is...to begin pick your 7 hour stretch, we picked 11 pm to 6 am. Then you let her nurse right up til 11 pm, after that you pick her up comfort her then put her back down or co-sleep for a bit whatever works for you. It will take BOTH you and hubby to be strong for a week or so til she gets it and will self-soothe. It took about a week for my son and then he was sleeping through (unless he was teething) Just make sure that your routine whatever it may be is the same every night and that there is no crazy schedule to deal with or you'll be knocking yerself out for nothing! Good luck, it will work!

I know this is a little late...but I can totally sympathize! I did wean the night feeds when my daughter was 14mos, I work full time and needed sleep desperately. Like you, I was torn about the decision, but took the route of weaning the night feeds. I didn't cut her off cold turkey, we nursed once around 1am, but I think that was more for me than her. In hindsight, I think the 1 feed might have confused her more, not sure. But I would go into her room each time she woke and lean into her crib and held her while she cried(which was only a few minutes, but SO hard not to pick her up!). I told her "it's night night, time to sleep, mommy's sleeping too" everyone is sleeping etc.. but then only one time during the night, I would pick her up and nurse her. we did this for a couple of weeks, and then I stoped picking her up all together, but still going in each time to reassure her I was there, we did that for a couple more weeks, although the wakings automatically lessened. She understood quickly that nursing was for bedtime, mornings and naps on weekends. My daughter is 21mos now and still loves to nurse at those times, and has become a great sleeper! I never thought I'd see the day! We both get to benefit from good sleep! What ever you decide, be proud you are still breast feeding!! What a wonderful thing! Good Luck:)

i always pumped myself in betreen feedings, put it in the fridge, started the babies (5 of them different ages) and introduced them to the bottle, bingo breast milk and sleeping thru the night. i made the mistake of letting my oldest son nurse at night in my bed at first, after i started the bottle introduction i played heck getting him to sleep in his own bed, i did not make that mistake with the other 4 children, good luck J.

Wow, I have to say that I disagree with most of the advice to cut her off or completely night wean. The WHO still recommends nursing until age 2 as a very important source of nutrition and other health benefits and since she is not nursing during the day, then nightime is her only chance. Additionally, if she is actually consuming breastmilk and not just playing, then there is another reason to contunue to nurse - she obviously is then taking it in for food/drink and is benefiting from it in some way nutritionaly as well as for emotional support, comfort and help with maturing and development. She could be going through a growth spurt even if it's not at the typical time frame. Just because teeth aren't coming through or she doesn't have a fever doesn't mean there is no reason for her to need to nurse. Since babies can't talk we can NEVER know why they are waking and why they need something. It could be a headache, sleepless, bellyache, too hot/too cold, etc - anything with no other typical symptoms.

I think you have been doing the right thing by giving her the nursing she asks for. Although it is tiring, you are doing something amazing and wonderful for your child. 16 months is still very young,especially to end nursing. A lot of kids this age get active and busy during the day and are too active to stop and nurse...as a result her body still recognizes her needs and makes up for it later. This is typical of active kids and kids with moms that are away from them by day and they don't get any other chance to nurse. Even though my 17 m/o eats solids, he still nurses day and night and it provides the benefits of nutrition as well as security.

My opinion is that cutting her off cold turkey sends a very odd signal to your child....one that is confusing and unfriendly. She has grown to trust you and has a special bond through nursing. She would be quite confused as to why this special thing you have offered and shared as a demonstration of love is refused???

If it were me, I would wait it out, keep doing what you are doing and try to remember that this is just one small stage that will be gone on itself soon enough. Most kids start to self night wean by age 2....otherwise you can attle and force your own preference rather than let it just hapen naturally, but it may come with other side-effects and reprocautions that you don't want to welcome either! If you feel you must have fewer night nursings, start with one and substitute comfort, water, etc and see how it goes for a couple of weeks...if it goes well with little additional night disturbance then select another session to wean and do it for a couple weeks and so forth. If at any time you realize that the battle is causing MORE sleep disruption now for your little one, you, hubby etc then you may want to rethink the battle and which option gives the most family members the most sleep....for us it is to nurse and doze back off....I know my children will not be nursing as they leave for college so I will offer it now while they still want/need it. Remember, the days are long but the years are short. Hang in there and best wishes for you and your little one:-)

First of all, congrats on nursing past a year! I love to see moms doing this, especially here in the U.S. My 2 y/o just weaned. :)

When there was too much nursing going on at night with one of my toddlers, I would find another way to comfort them to sleep. I'd tell them we only nursed once at night, and give them their lovey instead, turn on their music, settle them back down. Another way is to nurse her just a little, then put her back awake. If she is not used to going to sleep w/o nursing she may want you every time she wakes up. You want to get her to a place where she can go to sleep on her own w/o the nursing, so she doesn't need you simply for that.

Good luck!