Not Getting Straight/Honest Answers from 2 1/2 Year Old

I think what you wanted to know is how do you get a reliable answer from such a young child about illness symptoms? If he does not seem sick, I would not worry too much about knowing every little thing, because you just can't at this age for the most part. If he has pain, he will tell you, and you can observe him and look for signs of illness. As he ages, he will develop the capacity to be more involved in reliable give and take in this way.

Unless he really seems sick, don't sweat it. There are not many serious illnesses that will present without symptoms that you can really see, so you will know when he is really ill, and when he just feels a little icky, it does nto really matter anyway. We all have days when we just don't feel wonderful, but it is not a big deal, and since he does not yet have language for saying that something is not great, but not terrible, you should just assume that some days are better than others, unless you see an outward sign that there is something to worry about. He will be able to tell you one day!

M.

Your subject made me smile. How many 2 year olds ever give straight answers.
If he were really sick you would know. He wouldn't eat or wouldnt' be running around. He's probably just hungry or constipated. I wouln't worry about it.
By paying extra attention to the tummy thing though he will associate it with attention. So be careful if it really is a nothing.

I think you have to go by observation. Maybe he's running a fever, even a low-grade one. (On the other hand, some illness is not accompanied by fever, which I think is unfair to mothers.) Maybe he's not eating the way he usually does. Maybe he isn't as active. Maybe he just looks sick.

Those observations may be more reliable than what your son may say. But you want to ask him the questions anyhow, because that's the way he learns how to answer.

Some "tummyaches" need a hug to heal them, of course!

I think that if he tells you on his own, it's safe to say he is telling the truth and not feeling well...however I think you will have issues with getting a straight answer to a direct question for a few more months...my advice to you would be to pay attention to how he is acting and keep your listening ears on!

FYI: this may seem weird but I can always tell when my kids are getting sick because they smell different?

You're right that children this young don't understand honesty in the same way adults do. My grandson has only sorted that out this year, his 4th. Mostly, anyway.

Your little guy could actually have a tummy pain, but not bad or continuous enough to get in the way of play. I've seen kids carry on through all sorts of injuries that are still painful, but hey, what are they gonna do, sit and moan or get out there and play!

If you are concerned that the tummy ache is an untruth, keep in mind that all behaviors can be seen as strategies for meeting some need. If it's an invented pain, what need might your son be trying to meet? Avoiding something scary or someplace he doesn't want to go? Getting a little extra rest or attention? Another helping of ginger ale or jello, video or story time? If you can get to the bottom of what a "lie" might be about, you can help him find a more appropriate means of meeting that need.

We taught my grandson the story of the little boy who cried wolf, but I don't think he really understood the point well enough to apply it to his own actions until recently, at around 4.

sorry but your 2.5 yr old isnt lying to you and truthfully doesnt have the language perception to answer many of your questions in a meaningful way. As far as the tummy thing goes - it's not uncommon to have a little digestion problem where your stomach cramps and then it goes away, cramps and then goes away. Put yourself in his little shoes and ask questions in a way that he understands and then do your best to interpret the answers. He's not trying to mislead you on purpose, he probably just doesnt feel the pain right then.

If he is really sick, you will know it because it is recurrent, is accompanied by a fever or another symptom.

I totally understand your predicament. I'm a worrier and my daughter has a chronic list of ills (eyes hurt, back hurts, mouth hurts). The list goes on. I asked her doctor about her back because I was worried about her having something like a bladder infection or something awful. Anyway, his advice was to feel her stomach or back periodically and to trust my intuition. If your son does not flinch, move away etc. when prodding him (gently of course) and does not otherwise seem ill you might want to make the assumption that this is just part of him being two.

He could even be associating hunger with pain. You will know when he really feels sick-don't worry.

That age what might be "tummy" ache may not even be tummy related. It could be a variety of things...it could be gas one moment that passed, it could be cramping as in diarhea, it could be hunger, maybe he hit it somewhere and it hurt every now and then. Ask questions based on what you suspect it might be (be dr M.) and see what he points to. He may not be able to fully explain what tummy ache is...if all else fails, have it checked by the doctor.

Umm, he's 2.... what exactly are you expecting from him? 2 year olds are funny, confused, irritable, hard to understand, Etc, but they're certainly not liars. Your, nor anyone else's 2 year old, knows the difference between the truth and a lie.

Dear Jeanette,
It is difficult at this age to determine what is really going on when little one's complain of tummy aches. At this age "tummy ache" can be just about anything. Think of how most common illnesses affect us. At some level our stomach is involved either due to fever, drainage, pain etc. For some reason little one's hone in on the stomach ache when in fact they may very well have an ear or throat infection.
Just check him out thoroughly when he complains, keep up with his bowel movements and food intake and watch for other symptoms. If it is ear, they may pull or tug at it, if it's throat they may not want to eat/drink, etc. Once you've checked him out and if there doesn't seem to be any other symptoms declare him "just fine" and then send him off to play. He will let you know if he keeps coming back that it's time to have him looked at.
Hope this helps.
Mom of 3 adult kids

we are at the same stage. a lot of times i find my 2.5 year old is just imitating something my husband or i have said/done recently. one night we went out to dinner and my husbands stomach was upset afterwards and he was complaining his tummy hurt. about a week later my son was telling me his tummy hurt and after worrying about it and asking him all sorts of questions i remembered what had went on a few days before and decided he was just imitating his father.

i think if he is really not feeling good you'll know based on how he's acting - not eating, cranky, other symptoms etc.

I have the same issue. My 2.5 year old hit his mouth last week and I ask about his teeth, if they still hurt (they were knocked loose). Sometimes he says that they are all better, sometimes he says they hurt. They usually "hurt", when he doesn't want to go to bed. :) To tell how they are feeling, I give him something to eat and see how he chews. With the stomach, I would judge by the eating and activity. Also, talk to him about needing to know if he REALLY hurts, or if he is pretending. It has helped somewhat with my son.

Just give him a hug, tell him you're sorry he feels bad, and then pay attention to how he is acting/playing. When he's sick, you'll know it....whether it's snotty, coughing, fever, listless, red, sunken eyes....you can just tell.
My kids' tummies will hurt before they have to have a bm sometimes; i'll have them lay down and massage their tummies and they're usually back up and running around in no time.