Not Able to "Hold It" Overnight Still

There's no such thing as "night time potty traing" so he will be dry when his bladder & muscles are fully developed and not a day before.
No need to talk to him about it, or limit liquids.
Put a pad/sheet/pad/sheet in car to make bed changes easier.
Keep using a pull up at night.
Good luck.

TIME is the solution to this problem. :)

My son was the same way. It's not his fault his body is just not ready to go all night. My son was about 6 when he was finally able to go all night.

oh my, stop withholding liquids and "talking to" him about something he can't control. It will come in time, buy pull-ups and quit badgering him.

Completely agree with QueenfotheCastle on this one. When his body is ready its ready. Not much you can do about it. I'd back off on the talking with your son. He can't help it and its only going to result in him feeling ashamed.

Every child's body achieves night time dryness at a different time. It is not unusual for it to take until around age 7.

There is no need to withhold liquids from him. When his body is mature enough to stay dry, it will, with or without the liquids. My kids all get about 8 oz of milk at bedtime, and my 6 yr old and 3 yr old stay dry. Their bodies are just ready for it.

If he soaks through regular pull-ups, you can look into the Goodnights that are more substantial and also more comfortable to wear (according to my son when he was almost 5).

His body cannot be forced to speed this process up. It is a connection his bladder and brain must make on their own.

Please understand that this is very normal, because daytime potty training has nothing to do with their ability to stay dry at night - they don't have any control over it so talking to your son about it all the time will probably only increase his anxiety. There is a hormone that the body produces that naturally makes your kidneys concentrate your urine more at night - otherwise we would all be waking up all night with wet beds or having to go. When this hormone kicks in is different for every kid and some kids will still wet at night until 7 or 8 years old. My cousin's daughter had to wear some kind of pull-up or absorbent underwear until she was around 6. Talk to your pediatrician and they will most likely tell you the same thing.

He's not ready. There's a chemical that tells the bladder to stop making urine when you sleep. Some kids don't have it until they are older. Just keep the pullups on him.

My DD is 4.5 and I'm just not worrying about this. I praise her when it's dry or when she gets up, but otherwise just ignore the full pull up. When we were kids, there weren't pull ups and we just wet the bed. Unlike daytime dryness, it's a lot more physical ability. My DD is a HEAVY sleeper. I can easily move her from somewhere else to her own bed without her waking. But that also means she doesn't wake up to pee. She'll get there. Some kids wet the bed well into their elementary school years and while I hope she is not one of them, I'm also mindful that to this point she's been on the slower end of normal for almost all physical milestones.

Everybody is telling you the truth. No need to with hold liquids.. Night time dryness is a physical development. His body is just not ready.

I want to share a story. My best friend has a younger brother. I remember he wore "Diapers" in elementary school. This young man has always been very bright, popular and athletic. It was not till he was in 4th grade, his body clicked in and he was past this.

He is now a VERY handsome 6'4" Police Sargent. I would not be surprised if in the future he became a Police Chief. He also is a Body Guard to the George W Bush family when they visit Austin. (He photographs well)..

So your son could very easily continue to have this problem.. But he will eventually catch on.. How old was you husband when he was night time dry? Also be sure your doctor has documented this so if he feels there could be a problem he can make suggestions or give tests.

Hang in there. He is still in the Normal "range".

My 5yr old boy is exactly the same as yours.

We're going to be in pull ups overnight with him for awhile, I think.

Yes... my advice is stop worrying and talking to him about it each night. Night time dryness it totally different than daytime dryness. It isn't part of potty training... it is a function of the size of his bladder, how heavily he sleeps, etc. Some kids' bodies do not wake them up enough (the message isn't sent or received strongly enough) signaling them to wake up... to go to the bathroom. There is nothing he can do about this.
Just give it time. And do nothing to shame him about it whatsoever.That is counterproductive.

My own son had overnight accidents off and on (tapering over time) until he was around 10 years old. It often seemed (in the later of those years) to coincide with growth spurts ...
He is 14 now and it has been a non-issue for several years.

It isn't training (or lack of) it is just his body. No need for going to the doctor about it at this age either. If he is still having nightly issues when he is 7 or 8, then consider consulting the doctor. But I'd bet dollars to donuts that it will be an occasional thing by then...

Stop talking to him about it. His body does not wake him up or he's not physically able to hold it all night. Either get him up several times a night or just keep him in a pullup. I know kids as old as 7-8 and even 10 who still wet the bed and their doctors are not concerned.

Same as everyone else: the only advice is wait it out. And stop talking to him about it. All you're doing is making him feel like a failure. There's nothing he can do to control his bladder until his body is ready. And right now, it's not. So he's not having "accidents", he's peeing while he sleeps. It's natural and normal and not something to shame him about.

There have been a million questions about this - please search out the others so you can see how many hundreds of responses say the same thing.

And for what it's worth - my six year old daughter still wears a Pull up at night. She wakes up wet every single night. We were just at the doctor for her yearly exam today and the doctor didn't blink an eye when P told her that she still wore a pull up.

My son was 7 1/2 before he was through with pullups at night.
Some of his friends were 11 or 12 before they finished.
Your pediatrician will tell you that it just takes longer for some kids and it's perfectly normal.
It's not something he can consciously control.
When he wakes up dry every morning for 2 weeks in a row, then he's done with pullups.
Until then - relax and try not to worry about it.

I completely agree with all the other posters who say you need to stop talking to him about it. However, I read an article a while ago that said that constipation is a hidden cause of a lot of bed wetting. Uneliminated waste can put extra pressure on the already immature bladder. Try some more fiber in his diet.

My son was a bed wetter. The doc was not concerned because he had no problem during the day. It sometimes takes time for a child to be night time ready. My son was a very deep sleeper. We could easily carry him, asleep, from the living room and throw him up to his top bunk and he would not wake up. One day, he just stopped. He handed me an unopened pack of nighttime pullups and said I could return them to the store because he did not need them. He was about 8 or 9. Unfortunately, my husband acted like it was all his fault and would tell my son that he was lazy. That finally stopped after a while. It is not his fault. We went through a lot of changes to see what would work. We stopped liquids after dinner, we stopped milk after snack after school, we cut out after dinner snacks, we woke him up during the night. All that did was disturb his sleep. We even tried an alarm and that did nothing. He was already wet when it went off. Some kids just take time.

This is something that will happen in time and your son has no control over it. I wouldn’t make him feel badly about it either, that will just cause more problems later on.

For now just keep him in pull ups, his body is still maturing and in time he will not have nightly accidents.

stop talking about it. he is not ready. his bladder is nto ready to hold it all night and his brain is not ready to wake him up.

my daughter is in pull ups at 7 we do not talk about it.. they are usually wet. it is not a bad behavior... they cannot control it..

I'm so glad you asked this because my son just turned 6 and my husband thinks he's old enough and it's time to switch to underwear, let him be uncomfortable, so that he'll want to wake up and pee instead of sleeping through it.

I'm all for training him to wake to pee instead of sleeping through it, and I asked hubby if HE was willing to do the cleanup because I'm the one that wakes up early. Hubby said YES. But what's the point if it won't actually help?

I left a message for the pediatrician to ask about this, thanks to the reminder of this post, so we can either go ahead with underwear or leave the pullups in place till he's dry a lot.

Thanks again for asking this.

My son still had night-time accidents until he was about 6 or 7. We would wake him up every night at 11:00 to go to the bathroom. Most nights we'd either carry him or he'd sleepwalk and have no memory of going in the morning. But eventually, he started getting himself up at that same time and even now at almost 9, he continues to get himself up at around 11 to go. Be patient and just take him before you go to bed.

My daughter was almost 7 before she could hold it through the night. She's a super heavy sleeper and never woke up to go pee.

he can't help it. His body is not mature enough to be night "trained". I wouldn't make a big deal out of it. He'll probably grow out of it. If he's still having a problem at 11 or 12, you could consider other options like and alarm etc...

Talking to him isn't going to solve the issue. I suggest that it's a developmental issue, and you might want to consider that his bladder is still immature. He's only five, and his bladder is still growing so accidents at night can be common until 7 years old.

If this is occurring nightly, you might consider taking him to a chiropractor to see if there's an issue there. My youngest brother had wetting issues until he was 8 or 9, and it was because the signal that his bladder was full wasn't reaching his brain. He had a few adjustments with a really good, renowned chiropractor and never wet the bed again.

When my son was five, I put him to bed at 8, then got him up around 10:40 or 11:00 to go again, he would not full awake, but void a lot of urine! (I never withheld water) This cured the problem for us, after months of this I started taking him to the bathroom a little earlier.
According to Dr. Sears "DON'T RESTRICT FLUIDS In my experience, withholding liquids is not helpful and may be harmful. Children need to drink a lot for proper bodily function, especially during hot months. Restricting fluids may cause dehydration and constipation, which can aggravate bedwetting."

I didn't read prior responses, but why does he have to "hold it"? Can't you teach him to get up and go to the bathroom? If you get up yourself, go wake him up and take him so he learns to go on his own then go back to sleep.

Since he has no control over this talking to him about it does nothing except make him feel bad about it.

Could you use the search option on the top of this page and put in night time potty training? This is a question that is posted nearly every day. It takes so much time to re-write the same information over and over.

He is not in control of the chemicals in his brain and this is TOTALLY a brain issue, not a choice.

Our daughter turned 5 a few weeks ago and also still wears a pull up at night. She just recently started waking with the pull up dry more mornings than not, she has been potty trained for more than 2 years.
We made the decision a long time ago to not worry about when she would stay dry over night because it is something outside her control - it is a chemical process in her body that will happen when it is supposed to. A couple of things have to happen for them to wake up to use the restroom - 1) their body has to understand that the bladder is full and 2) the "wake up" signals have to be sent in time for them to actually wake up and go.
I think our deciding not to worry about it has actually helped because when she wakes up dry, she is VERY excited and feels like she accomplished something, but there is no stress if she wakes up wet. They all develop at their own pace, I don't know that I would worry too much.

This is not something he can control. When his body is physically ready, he will no longer need any help at night. This is one of those things as parents we little to no control over. Stop discussing it. Stop talking about it. It is what it is, and there is nothing that can be done.

My daughter is also 5, and day-trained around age 3. I've talked to other parents about this, as well as the pediatrician. I'm pretty sure it's physiological -- their bodies just don't wake them up to use the toilet yet. If it goes on for more than another year, I'll be concerned. But unfortunately, I don't think any talking about the situation will help -- they just need to grow out of it. On the rare night my daughter is dry, we give her lots of positive attention and try to downplay the fact that she's wet just about every night. I think that's all we can do, for now. Hang in there!

My son is almost 10 and we have this issue. We don't make a big deal about it. I have a matress protector on his mattress and also bought a protector that goes OVER the fitted sheet so I can just take that off most of the time without stripping the entire bed. It is from One Step Ahead's website. He wets through the Goodnite sometimes it is that full. Ped said the same thing, it just takes time. The main thing is to not make him feel bad about himself because of it.

Time will take care of this. Many children have this issue. He will not go to college in pull-ups. They do have alarms that you could use. Really would not worry about it.

My son was like that and is now 10 almost 11 and we just now put him on medication. We wanted to wait till he was a little older to try anything as we don't like to overly medicate our kids and some kids just take longer than others to stop as my oldest was almost 7 when he stopped. But we have a LONG family history of boys especally wetting the bed. So we knew it was genetic. I would give him time before checking into meds. I honestly don't know how old they want them to be. Sometimes their kidneys don't have the hormone that tells them not to go. My son still is wet maybe one to two days a week. But a lot of times thats cause he either didn't go to the restroom before bed or drinks too much after he takes his meds.

those are not accidents, and they are not on purposes either. They are just his body hasn't gotten the hormone that stops them from peeing at night. It doesn't matter if you withhold liquids for 4 hours before bed, he will not be dry until that hormone kicks in. If he is still doing it at 7 then get an alarm and try a chiropractor (6 visits max, if they stop it in that time they won't stop it that way). If at 8 he's still doing it then you talk to your doctor and they can prescribe pills.

My rule for stopping pull ups was dry for a week straight, then they can have pull ups, but more then 3 pees in a week and they go back to them.
With my daughter she was still having issues at 7 1/2 and upset about it so the doctor gave her the meds then, they did not work. None of the other things worked either. A month before she turned 8 we started her on homeopathic pills that I got at Whole Foods and those are what finally stopped it. BUT it turns out that she had kidney reflux and when the middle of the night peeing stopped her infections got really bad. By the time she was almost 9 we were testing for the reflux and at 9 1/2 she had surgery to correct it. So that may be the reason that nothing worked for her.

Well don't feel bad, it can be frustrating. Now that you know this is not just him and this issue is not abnormal, no biggie, buy the pull ups and let time take its course. Much easier on both of you.

Hi C.,

If it eases your mind any, I have twin boys that will be 8 in mid June. One has been dry at night for close to two years and the other.....well, full pull ups every morning. Not really too worried about it. I know he won't go to college still wearing them :-) Don't sweat it too much!

Try stretching out his bladder. Every few days have him wait a second or 2 if he needs to go. Keep adding on seconds until he can hold it without it being painful. You don't want him to hold it for a long long time so he doesn't get a UTI, but still, holding it for a few seconds more at a time might do the trick.

For example, if I was at the store with my son and he needed to go to the bathroom, we would head to the bathroom BUT we just didn't run to it. Same at home...if he was at the kitchen table doing homework and he had to go, I'd have him take the long way to the bathroom, or I'd ask him to use the one upstairs. I wasn't trying to be cruel, I was just trying to stretch his bladder. He's been nighttrained since he was 4 in pre-k and has an accident maybe once or twice a year (he's 7).

Good luck!

My friend's daughter is 5.5. She has been potty trained since 2.5 but still wears a pull up at night. She wakes up SOAKED every morning. My friend has checked on her at various times throughout the night and she's often wet pretty early on but seems to go more than once. Around her 4th birthday, they pushed to train her - waking her at night to pee, giving her rewards, etc - but nothing worked. So they left it alone.

All of a sudden, a few weeks ago, she started waking up dry. She has been dry every night but one for the last three weeks. It was totally sudden and went from soaked to dry with nothing in between.

Give it time and it'll probably happen on it's own all of a sudden one day. My friend says others have told her their kids were the same.

He cant help it. Just keep putting pull ups on him. My brother still wet the bed in high school. My parents tried everything. Some people are just harder sleepers.

My son wants to have dry pullups but it just has not happened. I also noticed that at times he will use it because he is lazy. If I had more money and time I would put him to be in his underwear, but since we work full time and live in a condo, where we have to pay per load of laundry. The pull up is just fine by us.

A while back we 'fogot" his pull up one night and he woke up dry.. that lasted about 3 more nights. then for two weeks strait he was back to "accidents".. which means laundry every night, changing out the bed in the middle of the night etc.. We have not tried agian.

Good luck

Here's another experience to let you know it is totally normal.

My now 13 year old stopped wetting the bed when he was 10. My 10 year old girl and 6 year old boy still wet.

Doctors told us it is totally normal. They will grow out of it when their bladder muscles develop more..and the hormone that is released to trigger the brain-bladder connection to wake up increases in their body.

Keep buying those pull-ups, invest in a plastic mattress enclosure. I just replaced on and got it at Target. It totally encases the mattress and you zip it up. Our kids strip their own beds and take it to the washing machine.

Also, having parents that were late bed wetters increases the chances of having a bed wetting child. Both my hubby and I were bed wetters...our pedigree has a long line of bed wetters...yes...so proud of that pedigree trait :)

Our doctor said to only come back to him with this issue if it continues after age 13, stops our child from wanting to participate in overnight camps etc or makes him/her feel shamed. My understanding is there is a pill kids can take that helps stimulate an increase in the hormone needed to trigger the brain-bladder connection.

Good luck and best wishes!!!