Night weaning...part 2 - Pueblo,CO

We did the bottle of water with my oldest (she was bottle fed anyway) and she just got mad and threw it. We ended up having to let her cry. I would stay in the room with her, and lie next to her crib (my husband worked nights)

Is the middle of the night feeding the last to eliminate? You may just have to let him cry for a night or too.

J.,

My husband and I recently night weened our 18 month old, and we've been very successful. I'll share with you our process.

First of all, we don't espouse the "cry it out" philosophy. So, it was important to us that our son always felt responded to when he was crying in the night.

The magic bullet for us was when we decided that I would no longer be the one that would respond to our son's needs at night. Instead, my husband (what a guy!) would be the one to get up and comfort him. It has worked out like a charm. It only took about a week for him to wake up less and less, and he would go back to sleep with very little effort. Doug would just go in and pat his back or lay down by him for a few minutes until he fell back asleep. He often sleeps through the night now, but not always. About 2-4 days a week he will wake up 1-2 times a night.

Good luck in your efforts!

I second the suggestion for Dr. Jay Gordon's plan. We have also used a sippy cup of water at night. At first, my sons would refuse the water almost every time and still want to nurse; but eventually, they would take the cup more and more. At a certain point, you can tell him that you only have milk when the sun comes up. You may want to spend more time nursing and cuddling during the day, too.

Elizabeth Pantley's No-Cry Sleep Solution, really helped me to teach my son to sleep through the night. We continued to nurse in the day, but he did great on his own all night. He was a year old.

Good luck!

my oldest did not go by the books. he has a difficult time letting go of things. he was 2 1/2 when he stopped waking at night. he is like me-- i can not sleep if i feel at all hungry. this is the best we were able to do with him: wean him at 15 months (i think pregnancy hormones helped him be less interested, but i'm not suggesting that!), have prepared bottles of milk in the fridge that my husband or i could give him at night (this allowed me to sleep more), switch from the bottle to nuby cups at about 23 months. at this point he still insisted on a cup of milk before bed, one sometimes in the middle of the night, and one first thing in the morning. he is 6 now and just this year has not felt the need to drink milk every morning, but the one just before bed is still important to him. we switched to straw cups around age 3, but we probably could have made that switch sooner. all of the changes we tried to do sooner, but he was so stubborn. luckily he was willing to pee in the toilet fairly early on. that was important with all that he was drinking at night. and pullups. good luck!

Have you considered talking to a La Leche League Leader or attending a LLL meeting? You'd probably get lots of sympathetic advice from experienced moms--LLL has saved my mom sanity more than once.
Also, there are two excellent books I highly recommend for you. One is "Mothering Your Nursing Toddler" and the other is "How Weaning Happens." They each offer unique information that is not the same old re-hash of weaning advice you'll find elsewhere. You local LLL group might even have them for you to borrow.
It sounds like your little man is eager for some extra calories and some closeness, too. Could you have a special snack and cuddle with him right before bed? I found it helpful to say "goodnight" to everything (including nursing) with my middle son. I also used counting and singing little song helpful in reducing time nursing--"You can nurse until I count to 10," or "You can nurse while I sing 'Eensy Weensy Spider.'"
He is hitting a lot of developmental milestones and this is a brutal flu season, so even as you start the weaning process, you can feel good about all the advantages if breastfeeding you have offered him. Best wishes!

I have just a minute to respond, but what I found helpful when night-weaning my son (which we did around 18-19 months) was a modified version of Dr. Jay Gordon's night-weaning plan. You can find it here: http://www.drjaygordon.com/development/ap/sleep.asp

It took a few weeks of gradually doing less and less for him at night (while still being there to comfort him in ways other than nursing), but finally, he started sleeping through the night! I guess he decided that just holding my hand rather than nursing wasn't worth waking up for! ;) There were tears at the beginning and it got worse before it got better, but it did eventually work.

We continued to have a great breastfeeding relationship during the day (including right before bed) until he weaned around 26 months when I got pregnant.

He is now 3 and other than the occasional night-waking due to sickness/teething/etc, he has been sleeping through the night wonderfully since we night-weaned him.

Good luck!

I had my husband go in to our child with a baby bottle of water. He picked him up and cuddled him, offered the water, and put him back into bed (fussing) with the bottle. It only took two nights for him to stop waking up! Hope you find that something works as well for you-- best wishes.

I found when I weaned my children at nighttime, it took about two weeks for them to finally accept that mommy had no more milk. Then finally my children would sleep through the night without that night time feeding. I did everything else in the book to try and get them back to sleep; I understood it was time to wean and that my children werent being hurt by being weaned from me, even though I felt my heart strings being pulled while I was doing it. I knew that my children were getting enough nurishment from the food they ate during the day. Also they were receiving a vitamin, and the doctor said they were healthy. Weaning no matter when you do it, is a trying time on the heart strings; but its possible and eventually necessary. Good luck with this trial.

Hi J.! I couldn't pass up the opportunity to help a fellow mom in need of sleep! We women gotta stick together!

Ok! Pat yourself on the back because you are starting off on the right foot. I think how your baby goes to sleep sets the tone for the whole night! Also, make sure you are feeding during the day so he has no excuses to be waking you up. And remember, in case you think this (like most moms probably do) you are not selfish...You are the one who is taking care of the kids and the household and You can't do this if you aren't getting enough sleep.

My sister is an acupuncturist and she has told me that when a child doesn't sleep thru the night and cries for more food...it could be "food stagnation." This has to do with his digestion and feeding too often and too much could be the problem as well. This means that it is important to slowly decrease the times your child eats during the night. For example if your child is only waiting 3 hours between nursing try letting him go 4 hours and then 5 hours and so on. What I have done for my daughter is try and comfort her in multiple ways to get her to go back to sleep until it's been 4 hours. I keep laying her down and rubbing her tummy and humming our night time tune to her. I say cure words for night time like "I love you", "shhhhhhhh", "sweet dreams", ect... I try and be gently firm and consistent (but still loving) that it is bed time and time for sleep.

This leads right in to the book where I've got a wealth of knowledge from. It's called "The No-Cry Sleep Solution: Gentle ways to help your baby sleep thru the night" by Elizabeth Pantley. This book is full of pearls of wisdom from starting a night time routine to giving you ideas for a 10 day game plan. I see it as a wonderful platter of appetizers and I get to choose which ones are right for me and my baby.

The last thing I do is say positive affirmations..."I deserve to have wonderful beautiful sleep where I sleep thru the night. My baby deserves to sleep thru the night. Wonderful sleep is mine! I desire the highest good for myself and my baby." And then I visualize us having wonderful sleep in my mind's eye. I've also found that my own thoughts like "I know you will have a wonderful night sleep and you will be ok little one" for some reason has helped as well.

Don’t forget…every child is different and for that matter every mother is as well. Listen to your heart and it will guide you. It may be important to tag team with your partner, family or friend to get alone time so you can have an opportunity to have a quiet space to fully listen.

Good luck!

I don't have any advice for you. I'll be following this post for tips. My one year old nursed ALL NIGHT last night and while I'm not to the point of night weaning him, I have been dreaming of the night where he sleeps all the way through. I've been assuming that it will naturally happen before two! not true?

I'm going to go finish my coffee now.