Night-Time Potty Training for Boys

Nighttime potty trained is TOTALLY DIFFERENT than daytime. Don't limit his fluids, not good for him and don't wake him up to go, not good to interrupt his sleep. Nighttime will come when his body is ready for it. It can last up to 6-7 yrs old. Just put the pull-up on him and leave him be.

Night training isn't really training at all it's a medical issue. A child will not be dry at night until their actual body is ready to do it. It's a brain to bladder connection. This is from my pediatrician. Limiting liquids will not do anything but dehydrate him.

To keep him from going in them after he gets up make him change as soon as he gets out of bed.

"Night-time Dryness".... is not attained, even until 7 years old. It is a Biological based occurrence. This is per our Pediatrician as well.

A mere 4 year old, cannot control their bladder when asleep. Punishing will not 'make' them not have accidents or to be dry.
It is biological based. Not him being naughty on purpose.

Here is a link, from Parents magazine, about bed-wetting Myths:
http://www.parents.com/toddlers-preschoolers/sleep/bed-we...

http://www.parents.com/kids/sleep/bed-wetting/bed-wetting...

http://www.parents.com/kids/sleep/bed-wetting/dr-alan-gre...

My daughter is 7 years old.... she still has occasional accidents. No biggie. My daughter was still using night diapers until she was already 5 years old. Her Kindergarten Teacher said, that MANY MANY kids that age or older, still have pee accidents at night and use night time diapers. But, the parents won't admit it. Because they feel peer pressure about it all... not knowing that biologically, night time bladder control and consciousness is not fully developed yet at that stage.

I just use for her and my son, a water proof bed pad under them.
My Husband, even when he was older than 7, would have occasional pee accidents at night.

Keep in mind, that a child WILL have accidents. They are not perfect.
Scolding them for it, will not work.

Night-time bladder ability is entirely different than daytime potty ability.

all the best,
Susan

BOYS ARE DIFFERENT THAN GIRLS!

Stepmothers who never had a child are the worst judges of what constitutes normal childhood development and behavior. It is beyond me why men in getting a new woman look at childless women as if they will suddenly become loving mothers. They don't until they have a child of their own.
This is 35 years of counseling families that I am speaking from.

NUMBER ONE; NEVER PUNISH A CHILD FOR URINATING IN THE BED.
The child is crying the tears he cannot cry in the daytime.
Boys often don't train up at night until the male hormones kick in.
So if you brutalize him emotionally you will have his emotional problems forever, unless you leave his father and then he and his father will suffer.
That said. Be kind he does not want to be incontinent at night. He wants to make it to the toilet but by the time he gets the signal it is too late.
The days he is successful are the days you have not fed him things he is allergic to. A blood test can tell you what he is allergic to.

For all of you parents. You are ageing too. Men who are over 55 often cannot hold their urine. And women past menopause as well. The signal goes away until it is too late to make it to the toilet. Or laughter makes you leak. Go to any drug store or big box store and look at the aisles filled with pads and panties made to catch the urine of older people.

Now treat your child with compassion and understanding. He will get there. After all how many adults who are between 18 and 60 wet the bed?

Do not assume that it is intentional.
My son, the product of a happy still married to each other with a SAHM situation.. i.e., no POSSIBLE divorced child issues... had accidents off and on until he was 9 years old. And it is not at ALL uncommon in boys for this to be the case. Day time is one thing... but at night... well, some kids just sleep really really deeply and don't wake up. Or they don't wake up sufficiently... I can even remember as a child myself DREAMING that I WAS on the potty... only to wake myself by wetting myself. Too late then.. Now if he wakes in the morning and is playing in his bed/room and doesn't go to the potty that is different. But if he is just a deep sleeper, 4 years old is really pretty young to expect much different than what sounds like is going on.
Seriously. My son, at age 8, would be perfectly dry for 2 months, then wet the bed 3 nights in a row. He would be dry for the next 3 months, then wet every other night for a week. It was totally random, but came in spurts. I suspect it had to do with the growth of his body vs. the growth of his bladder. Some kids' bladders just don't grow fast enough to hold all their urine all night. And some sleep too deeply to feel it to wake themselves.
Let him wear pull-ups at night still if you want. If you don't, then wake him every night before you go to bed and take him to the bathroom an extra time.
Also, communication with his other parent about how it is addressed when he is with her would also be appropriate. But whatever you do, no scolding.
Have patience... it will get better over time.

Well, my only advice is that you're going to HAVE to give up the night time pull-ups. Especially because you can tell that he knows what to do. Once you realize the pull-ups are more for YOU because you don't want to deal with the mess....then, it's time to give them up. I bet it won't take him as long as you think to figure it all out. Because it's no fun having to wake up your grumpy aggravated parents and having to change your icky wet clothes and bed. My son turns 4 in June and he's been night trained since November of 2008. I remember that date b/c I was in a wedding & my mom watched my kids at my house so that my husband could attend the wedding. Well, she didn't know that we still put him in a pull-up at night, so she didn't. When we all woke up the next morning and he was in his underwear, I was like, "OMG....he did it!!" That's when I realized the pull-ups were more for me! LOL So, I invested in 3 waterproof mattress pads and I layered his bed with the mattress pad and sheet....then another mattress pad and sheet, etc. Until I couldn't fit anymore layers on there. That way, when accidents occured...and they did and still will once every blue moon........I don't have to get all the lights on and fumble with new sheets therefore getting everyone totally awake in the middle of the night. I can just rip off the top layer and there's a clean dry one ready underneath.
Really, I bet he won't have as many accidents as you think he will. Just try to stay positive and tell him "we're gonna do this! And we're gonna do it together"!! Help him by continuing to not allow drinks after dinner and by making him go potty right before he hops into bed and maybe giving him some incentives to work towards. But, most of all be sure to encourage him and tell him you KNOW he can do it and how proud you are of him when he wakes up dry. Good luck!!!

There are three things you can't make a child do: eat, sleep, or pee or poop on cue, (sigh). My son was like that. Completely dry until after breakfast until after 4 years. Really I would think to myself sometimes. I am changing mountains of diapers because I had a two years old too.

My son was motivated by going into a 4 year old preschool. His teacher said to me in ear shot of him that she usually didn't take children in diapers and she did not change diapers ever. All his friends were going to that school so he really wanted to go. Next day he was toilet trained. Easiest job I never did.

You might have to wait until your son is motivated by something he wants to do all on his own.

What worked for my son and I might not work for you guys, but you can sure give it a shot! :D We purchased a plastic fitting sheet for his bed and we got rid of those darn pull ups. They are more of a hindrance than a big help. (I know that they say don't wake them to go potty, but believe me, it didn't hinder my son's success nor his health status at all. Each child is different and may not work for some children, may work for others.) I made sure that he went potty before bed, woke him up to potty before I went to bed, then...(here's the part that sucked, but the persistence and routine schedule paid off) I would wake him up two or three times in the middle of the night to use the potty. Then, when he got up in the morning, I would have him go immediately. I made sure that the two things I followed through with were consistency and that I never ASKED him if he had to go. I always told him "Let's go potty." I realized the moment I asked him, I was giving him a choice...and let's face it, 9/10...your child will say "No." Night and day potty training are two different things and people are right when they say that there are differences in how to handle them, but as a mother...it is ultimately about trusting your instincts as a mother/parent. LOL Hope this helps you! :D Good luck!

I say take the pull-up away, that only gives him the freedom to pee in it. Yep your going to have to wash a lot of sheets! With my son, we used a waterproof mattress pad and over that I'd put down a couple of those baby lap pad things so I don't have to wash the mattress pad all the time. Also, I had two sets of sheets so if in the middle of the night he had an accident, I could just take off the sheet and the lap pad things. Also, don't let him have anything to drink before bed. I suggest actually not letting him have any beverage at all after dinner and then making sure he goes pee right before bed. Eventually, he'll get it. I wouldn't punish him for an accident but I would reward him for not having an accident. It just takes time. My son had accidents until he was about 4 1/2, he is almost 6 now and still has an accident from time to time. Good luck :)

Editing to say (after I read other responses)... I disagree with the whole idea that limiting his fluids in the evening will lead to being dehydrated. If the child gets enough fluids in the day then they won't be dehydrated so just make sure he's getting enough up till the end of dinner time. Also, drinking right before bed will surely lead to an accident. Even for me, an adult, if I drink liquids right before bed, then I'll have to get up to pee, if I don't then I won't. It's just natural LOL.

I agree with the first post. We found out that day and night training: if it was gonna get done, no diaper could be on. My son was trained and hadn't had an accident in ages. But then he had a stomach virus (he was 2, almost 3) so we gave him diapers to wear for the safety of not having to worry about an accident much worse than wet pants. What we saw was shocking---he would wet his pants in his diaper or pullup! I was like "what is this? you've been going to the potty for 6 months!" but he would wet his pants, especially in the early morning, every day. we took away the diapers and he had a couple accidents, but now he's back to going to the bathroom. it's unpleasant to be wet. diapers/pullups are not unpleasant. layer the bed with pads and sheets, and work through it with him. i wouldn't punish him. i don't think he's being lazy. that was another thing my son would do. he wouldn't come out of his room in the mornings til he heard us up and about. so he wouldn't go to the bathroom. not because he was lazy as much as he was almost scared or trepidatious about roaming the house without us, especially if it was dark. we don't have a night light in his bedroom because i don't want him to "need" one, but we leave the bathroom light on and make a deal of "See? All the toys are picked up so you just have to walk straight to the door; nothing to trip over or step on" and he can see a little light under the door so he knows where he's heading....we tell him that he doesn't have a baby gate on his door because he's a big boy, but big boys go to the potty when they need to. he started doing that, too......but only after we took away those diapers. to help this process, maybe you should not only take him to the bathroom in the night on the way to bed yourselves, but then as soon as you wake up go get him out of bed and walk him to the bathroom. you can lounge around after that is done, but get the business taken care of first.

He's not even 4 yet. Typically boys are 4 going on 5 before they're potty trained at night. Peeing in them after he's awake is a different story, but is it really worth punishing him?

If you want to wash bedding every day then follow the advice of the moms who say no to pull ups. If you want to let you child's body develop as it needs to and their mind not be messed up about peeing the bed then follow everyone elses advice.

My best friend is one of those who feel it is absolutely neccessary for the kids to be out of pull ups and diapers by 5 and washes sheets about every night. The Urologist told her the kids just weren't ready but she kept taking them to doctors over and over until they finally outgrew it at about 7 years old.

On the other hand I think kids develop as they need to. I can make their life hell on earth over something they have no control over or I can let it go.

Limiting fluid does absolutley nothing for bedwetting. As soon as they are asleep it's going to come out whether it was from 4 pm or 10 pm. It dehydrates them adn can cause constipation which is one of the main causes for nighttime bedwetting. The full bowels press on the bladder and cause it to flatten out.

I went through this with my daughter up until she was over 4 1/2 years old. I even asked about it on here. I got some pretty harsh criticism from one mom in particular that insinuated that I was abusing my child in some way. I only say this to warn you that those types of answers are out there.
What worked for us was taking away the pullup. We kept racking our brains trying to figure out why she was wetting...when we asked her, she simply said, "because I can, its a pullup." BINGO! We knew then that we had to take them away. We REALLY didnt want to deal with the nighttime changing and all that, but we knew we had to. We bought a few crib pads (the ones with felt on both sides) and laid them under her. all we had to do was replace the pad and underwear and back to bed. We had her sleep in t-shirts to make changing easy. We had a couple accidents each night for the first couple then one for a few more, then within a couple weeks she was a big girl! She still gets up a few times a week to go to the bathroom in the middle of the night, but that is just a fact of life.
I know it is a huge struggle and I know that you are probably too tired to want to deal with it (I know I certainly was), but its really the best option, IF he is wetting when he is awake and because he can.
Please though, whatever you choose, don't "punish" him for not keeping dry. That only complicates the issue. Making them feel bad for wetting isnt going to encourage them to stay dry, its only going to make them feel bad about it...

P.S. we woke up and took our daughter to the bathroom at 2am everynight for 3 weeks...she is perfectly healthy and well adjusted. Don't let anyone judge you for your decisions on parenting. There is not 1 perfect way to parent. We should all be here to encourage and offer suggestions, not judgements. Good luck with whatever you choose.

Could it be the stress? I had two boys that just slept hard and had accidents until they were 10 and 11. At that time there were no pull-ups. They would just help me to change the sheets and put them into the washer. We also put a plastic cover so the pee would not soak thru. We even went with sleeping bags on the beds that way it was easier to put into the washer. They don't mean to pee in their pants it is very uncomfortable.

Our daughter was having the same problems (having them pee in their pullup after they are awake is sooo frustrating!).

We bought two toys that she wanted and hung them above the bathroom door. One was the reward for 7 consecutive days of dry pullups, the other for 14 consecutive days.

She tried really hard and it was very distressing when she would wet on the 6th day. But I think a major factor was time. She was suddenly dry shortly before her 5th birthday.

It's hard to keep from letting your frustration show, but remember that he's just a little kid. Find a good incentive and give him the support he needs. Just give it a little more time.

Some kids may wet the bed until age 10. If he is awake and peeing in his Pull-Up, it may be time to discontinue using them. Teach him to strip his bed and bring the sheets to the laundry if he has an accident. Don't treat it like a big deal.

My friend had the same problem. She stopped using the pullups, child wet themselves a few mornings then decided they didn't like it. After that they got up to go.

If you are sure he is staying dry at night and only peeing once he is awake you can just go to undies, he probably will not go in those because it will get him all wet! But if you are not sure, and it is possible he is not yet mature enough physically to make it through the nigh then just keep waiting. some kids are as old as 7 or 8 by the time they can finally make it through the night. The average is between 2 and 5.

If only all the pains of parenthood happened during delivery and could be controlled with some deep breathing.... well the deep breathing still works and the labor is still pretty intense at various times.

You'll have to bite the bullet and let him wear his big boy pants to bed. Yes it's going to be a hassle for a few nights, but being prepared for the occasional accident will minimize the amount of work you have to do each day. Cover his mattress in plastic. Whether it's a plastic mattress cover or a couple large trash bags, cover it. The when you make his bed, remember to use those flannel covers rubber pads that you had in his crib. put that between the bottom sheet and the bed. He's four years old, he's totally capable of understanding consequences and the uncomfortable feeling of being wet. He knows the difference between right and wrong. Have him help you with the laundry each morning, his pj's, the sheets, the blankets. Then there's the morning bath. He will have to get up earlier to get that done or miss out on some of the morning activities while that happens. He will see that you aren't happy and he won't be either.

Helping him be successful by limiting his liquid intake after 7 pm. Getting him up around 11 pm before you go to bed for the night to empty his bladder, he won't be wide awake, but it will help him develop a routine and the bladder won't be bursting later in the night to the point of release.

It's work, for all of you. But it's well worth the efforts. Best of luck!!