My 2 1/2 year old daughter began showing an interested in using the potty around age 1.5. I was so excited. She was doing so well and by 2 years old was peeing regularly in the toilet and had a few successful poops in the toilet. She did regress when she became jealous of new baby sister, and wanted to be the baby again. She is now back to using the toilet almost every time she has to pee. There are occasional accidents. However, poop is a whole other issue. She will not poop in the toilet. In fact, she doesn't want to poop at all. She will cross her legs and try to hold it in. It is a fight most times to put a diaper on her, as she doesn't want to wear one. She will come to me telling me that she has a poop coming out of her butt (sorry for the gross-out). I will try to sit her on the toilet, but she doesn't want to take the time to let it come out. We end up putting a diaper on, then she completes the poop. I have tried giving her a book or toy while she sits on the toilet, sitting with her, a reward chart, etc. Wondering if anyone has experienced the same and/or if there is any good advice or tips.
Hi S.,
I don't have any advise, but I do have a great on-line book that I can forward to you (or anyone else who might need it). It gives some insight on what the child is going through. My email is ____@____.com. I hope to hear from you soon.
My son was potty trained by 2.5 (he was my first child and I felt I had to rush everything) but he wasn't poop trained until just before his 3rd birthday. We also added a baby before his 3rd bday. It's really no rush to potty train though. She will eventually poop on the toilet. Why don't you just set the pullups out in the bathroom and tell her if she has to poop to put one on and go poop in it. Tell her that you'll try to poop on the toilet in a few months. Then give her a break. Taking the pressure off can do wonders. My middle child is 4 and I did not even attempt to potty train him until his 3rd birthday. After his birthday party I threw away all the diapers and he had one accident in his pants. He hasn't had an accident since. I think waiting to potty train definitely has its perks. When you try to potty train them too young, they have accidents. If you wait until they are ready - the transition is much smoother!
i had to poop in front of my daughter a few times, but now she does it like a champ. I also give her one of her fav candies after each poop. (either 1 m and m or 1 candy corn). If she's afraid of pooping (as my dd was) I would try doing it in front of her and see if that helps.
She also poops about the same time every day, so every night after dinner she sits on the potty for a little bit until she goes.
It took both of my daughters a while to poop in the potty even when they were peeing regularly in the potty. It really clicked for both of them when they turned 3--it was like that was the "magic age". I would just wait, and not listen to the mother that said you were "giving up on her". It will happen.
Potty training....oh how crazy it can get. Most times we loose site of the big picture as we get so caught up in the steps. It is different for every child cuz every child is different, but here is what I learned through the journey with my two. First, the training part is for parents not the kids. Kids only job is to poop & pee & they have plenty of practice at it. She will do it on the potty when she wants it as much as you. So, now your job is to find her currency, this will change as she does, but this basic principal can be used for more the potty training, transitions through your kids life. works pretty good with husbands too. :) 1. Simply take her in the bathroom & let her know that she isn't a baby anymore and that means no more diapers. Let her know that cleaning poopy panties isn't fun and that from now on if she chooses to poop in the panties instead of the potty where big kids & grownups go, then she will have to help clean them. Here is where you make it uncomfortable and icky for her to go in her panties. When she poops in her panty, and she will, take her to the bathroom, take off the panties and turn on the tub. Have water temperature be slightly cooler than room temp. this in no way hurts her but is uncomfortable. Let her know warm water if for bathtime only. Now during the day when she asks for her currency thing (examples, tv, sweet drinks, certain toy (not nightime lovies) - (if she has a currerncy, then just use it then increase it to all things not essential to her health & well being), then answer her with a question, "did you poo poo in the potty today?" she says no & you say, well you have your answer don't you? Let me tell you, my 2 year old got it loud and clear! daughter tested me 4 days and she made it happen and nothing will describe my joy when she called out for me to come & see. I walked in the room & she yelled, "I did it, I did it!" She was so proud of herself and next words were, "Can I have chocolate milk now?" I asked the all important ? "did you poop in the potty? and will big smiles I got a resounding "YES, I DID!!!!" No looking back. My son I think tested a day. His transition was very uneventful and smoother. For night time I had them go before bed at 8/8:30 then I & woke them at 10/11 when I went to bed. I got up again at 1am and got them to go again. they would make it till 6:30am at which time I got up for the day as did they. After about 2 months, they begged me not to wake them that they would do it themselves and we tested it at the 1:00 and they did it! then I slowly cut out the 10 waking and now both my 4 & 5 year get up & go without help or waking up anyone else & go back to bed on their own. Yes you loose a little sleep for a few months, but you do not have to deal with loads of laundry huge nasty pullups in trash and most importantly, you get your kids to want it as much as you did. They feel proud of the achievement as they should because they earned that currency. they get a big heaping dose of self confidence and it is all done without frustration, anger, resentment, control. TIPS for on the go..... go to a garage sale and buy a weeks worth of clothing (about $5.00) and put in a bag to keep in your car. Buy zip bags, 1 gallon size to store ick clothes till you get home, pack wipes, and buy and keep in car puppy pads. Use these for carseat. just lay puppy pad down in seat and it works great. You can afford these supplies cuz you won't be buying pull ups! :) hope this helps & best of luck.
One mom's advice said there is no hurry o potty train. As a mom of 29 years I highly disagree. Toddlers should be more advanced than infants in every way. Personal Hygene is also a factor in my opinion. My children were pooping in the potty by 20 months. Pullups are nothing less than a diaper with out tape they are not training pants regargless what the package says. Using pulups give a child security to poop/pee in them, because the feeling is not different than a diaper. I used reward and discipline with my children, and it was stress free, and very easy. and i did make it fun and rewarding. She's not failing pooping in the toilet, you the parent is giving up and letting her off the potty knowing she has to go and putting a pullup on her, she's the child your the parent but you are letting her be in charge. Take charge and be patient but firm with her, and you will have great success. J.
My son will be 4 in May, and i just got him potty trained. He has been going pee in potty for about 5-6 months,but potty was a different story. When he needed to poop I would have to put a pull -up on him. Even out and about if he needed to poop, i would put a pull-up on. We tried everything- bribing him with a fun activity or a new toy he wanted. I would keep the pull-ups in the hall closet and when he needed to poop he would put one on and do his business then me or daddy would change him. What finally was successful was so easy- i told him after these pull-ups are gone we are not buying any more that is it. So the day came- he needed to poop -looked for the pull-ups, cried a bit, screamed a bit- "please go buy some more" we said no- go sit on the potty and i will help you when your done. Well he did it and after believe it or not- he was happy and proud and said " i am glad i go in the potty' It has been a success ever since. Hope that helps- one day it will click and that will be it
good luck
B. S. from illinois
Updated
My son will be 4 in May, and i just got him potty trained. He has been going pee in potty for about 5-6 months,but potty was a different story. When he needed to poop I would have to put a pull -up on him. Even out and about if he needed to poop, i would put a pull-up on. We tried everything- bribing him with a fun activity or a new toy he wanted. I would keep the pull-ups in the hall closet and when he needed to poop he would put one on and do his business then me or daddy would change him. What finally was successful was so easy- i told him after these pull-ups are gone we are not buying any more that is it. So the day came- he needed to poop -looked for the pull-ups, cried a bit, screamed a bit- "please go buy some more" we said no- go sit on the potty and i will help you when your done. Well he did it and after believe it or not- he was happy and proud and said " i am glad i go in the potty' It has been a success ever since. Hope that helps- one day it will click and that will be it
good luck
B. S. from illinois
My daughter (now a teen) wouldn't poop either, but did once in the toilet, so I knew she could do it. When she was about 2 months away from turning 3, I told her by her third birthday no more diapers for poop. So her birthday came, nothing. Next day, nothing. She did try though. So on the third day of nothing, I called the doctor and they told me to get glycerin suppositories and it helps the poop to come out. Luckily, my daughter let me put one in her, and 5 min. later she was on the toilet pooping. The rest is history!
My daughter was doing something similar. We stared giving her a really good probiotic called PB8 and it gives back to the intestines good bacteria and a natural effect of it, is it can loosen the bowels....just enough to make it easier on the adult or the baby. We open a capsule and give her none to 1/4 to 1 a day depending on what she needs. She could be feeling constipated, but maybe always has, so she has no idea that it may not be normal. PB8 is WAY safer than fiber, etc.
