M.K.
I suggest a simple solution,
15 to 20 minutes PRIOR to feeding or changing the Baby, Give your daughter attention, play a game or read to her for those 15 minutes, when the 15 minutes are up, set up a snack for her at the table, and THEN start the feeding.Try feeding the baby at the table aswell this way your eating as a family.
you could even set out a plate of fruit and juice for yourself.
Same goes for Diapering, 15 minutes before diapering,you give your daughter 10 to 15 miutes of attention, and then play a movie on the TV.
Change the diaper in the same room as the TV.
IF your daughter starts you send her to get the diaper, and then the wipes, and then to toss the diaper in the trash.
praise her when she listens.
As for the potty training, its a process,
just try watching the potty video everyday,
first thing in the morning, put on her big girl undies,
( she may pee her pants)
and sit her on the potty,
if she pees and poos give her some candy and do the potty dance while singing a song. Pee pee in the potty pee pee in the potty, call gramma on the phone and everyone you know to brag about her success.
then set an eggtimer for 1hour,
tell your daughter when it rings its time to sit on the potty
and then when it rings have her sit on the potty.
Collicky babies, I would suggest you use a snuglie, to hold your baby on your chest,this way your hands are free.
when he is awake and needs to be held
when he is sleeping, use a PILLOW to elevate his head & back , and keep him in an upright position.this helps with reflux.
burp him after his feedings so he burps the gas out.
aqua sounds by fisher price, is a great musical sound machine for the crib, it soothes them.
and
http://www.coliccalm.com/baby_infant_newborn_articles/col...
your daughter is still just a baby, not even 2 years old, so its ok to treat her as one.
give her the silicone straw bottle looking sippy cup,
there is nothing wrong with that.
take a deep breath and realize you cannot do it all, you need help, so ask for it.
http://www.meetup.com/cities/us/ny/oceanside/groups/famil...
this is the link to a moms group in your area, I suggest you join one ,for support and friendship.
Good luck MOM,
it DOES GET BETTER.
M