My Son Was Retained in 8Grade

I used to teach high school in MA. If he didn't pass middle school, there is a reason and you MUST have been notified about parent conferences and other supports that the school was willing to put into place to help him be successful. Was there an attendance issue? I can't imagine for one second that you are only just finding out about this now. How else could you possibly have enrolled him in remedial classes/ summer school over the summer (and why didn't you???). High schools can't take the chance of accepting kids who have not passed middle school. I remember in my district, every year on the fist day of school, the principal would take the kids who didn't pass middle school and didn't take summer school classes and march them right back down the street to the middle school. Seems like the best bet would be for him to repeat 8th grade. He'll learn a valuable lesson about hard work and accountability.

(I am an educator).

In California, parents have to sign a document saying that they understand that their child is behind, it lists what the school has done to help the child, and then whether or not the child is being retained or not.

Did you sign a document?

With that said, the school would not have suggested retaining your child if he was not severely behind in several subjects. Do you really want to push your child forward when he is already struggling? It is too bad that they didn't retain him in a earlier grade since the social stuff doesn't get so much in the way.

I would also think about what outcome you want from school for him? Do you want him to graduate from high school, from college? If so, please keep him in 8th grade this year, to give him a chance to catch up. If your goal is just to attend until you don't need too, well, push him forward. But the choices you make now will determine how academically successful he will be. In addition to retaining him, he should also be given additional tutoring.

Good luck!

Typically no, you can't just go register him for high school. Was he recently retained or did this happen way back in June? What did his teachers say at the end of the year when he was held back? Either way, you need to have conversations with his 8th grade teachers to find out why he was retained (maybe they have a good reason or maybe he isn't academically prepared for the rigor of high school?). Also perhaps check in with the guidance counselor or administrator assigned to him.

It is important to find out exactly *why* he was retained (grades? test scores? absences?) and get an understanding of that before you attempt to put him into high school.

8th grade is a huge deal. They usually really make the kids bust their butts to prepare for high school because it's a whole different world.
Are you just now finding out about this?
When did the school year start?
You should have known over the summer break, if your school has one, that retention was being discussed.
I'm pretty sure you can't just go sign your child up for high school when his records indicate he's been retained, for whatever reason.
You might find a private or charter school to take him, but I would be more concerned about the reasons for his retention.
You don't have to take it personally.
It doesn't have to mean your kid is messed up or anything.
High school is hard.
My son just started his sophomore year and his freshman year was pretty bad. He's not a bad kid or anything, but he's typical. All the sudden you have 6 different teachers with 6 different homework assignments per night, you only have 5 minutes to get from class to class and my son's locker is in the middle of nowhere compared to where his classes are. They only have so much time for lunch and that's their only break during the day. It's a HUGE adjustment. Even kids, like my son, who did great in middle school, struggled in their freshman year. It's like entering a completely different world.
Your son's teacher or teachers may feel he's not ready for that.
If he's not, he's not. That isn't the worst thing in the world, really.
My friend is a teacher. She administers the GATE program. Her son is really smart, but he did so bad his freshman year of high school that he had to do workshops, summer school. He got so far behind. Now he has to repeat all the classes he failed, he's not allowed electives. High school is really hard.
I think you should talk to the school about their reasons for retention and have an open mind about it. If your son struggled in the 8th grade, high school will be worse....I'm guessing.

Call the high school guidance counselor. See what it says in your son's records and talk to his current school. The main thing is doing what's best for your son.

I hope you get some great responses and I wish you the very best.

It might be different in different School Districts, but you probably cannot just go register him if he has been retained. The first thing I would do is to go in and make an appointment to meet with his 8th grade principal and primary teacher and discuss why. It is NOT something you ought to feel awkward about or ashamed, etc. Kids get kept back a grade for all kinds of reasons and schools usually only do so if they really feel like there is a need.

It could be that another year to mature and go over the 8th grade material will help to set your son up for greater success later on in high school. Has he been tested in school? Find out the results- it may be possible that your son needs an IEP (Independent Education Plan) which the school is legally required to help provide you with. This will help them tailor the lessons to your son's individual needs and abilities and again- don't look at it as something to feel bad about- it is designed to help him succeed!
Kids learn in all different ways- go talk to the school principal and teacher and find out just what is going on and what they can do to help with it. Good luck!

why was he retained?? They must of sent a letter or called you. If your not sure then you need to call the School and find out whats steps you need to take. Good luck!

You need more answers here. They will not accept him in HS without his previous records and his previous records might not be released if they want him retained. I am not familiar with the laws in your state, but parents must agree to retention if it is not part of the No Child Left Behind Act, which does state that children can be held back due to deficient reading skills. I'm guessing that these discussions were held at the end of the school year so I fear that your son is missing out on valuable learning time when this matter should have already been adressed. For his sake, please contact the principal at his 8th grade school immediately and get to the bottom of this.

I know you are not feeling comfortable with his retention. There must be a solid reason for him being detained and sending him on the high school might be the wrong decision and cause him undue stress and failure.

You don't mention why he was retained and usually it is due to failure of classes, testing and or missing school over so many days which puts him behind his peers.

As his parent, you can do as you like but you really need to weigh your options carefully.

As far as I understand, parents can override the school's recommendation for retention. If you believe that moving him into high school is the best action for him then I would speak to your son's middle school guidance counselor and principal to get the paperwork in order to move him along. Schools don't typically recommend retention so there must be a valid reason for doing so. Weigh your pros and cons and proceed accordingly.

Why do you want to go against the advice of the school? Maybe it would be best to let him repeat 8th grade, or he might do poorly in high school.

Hello N.,
You have received many excellent comments.
To reiterate what several have said, you need to know why your son was retained. Is he missing basic skills- reading, writing, math, study skills? Does he have social issues? Does he have an IEP? Have you attended the parent / student conferences. With school starting or having started, make an appointment with the guidance counselor, and case manager (if he has one).
If your son does not have an IEP, and you feel and the school feels he is lacking some basic skills- education or social, ask for a special meeting to see if your son qualifies for special education services or for a 504 plan. Be proactive, and the advocate that your son needs.
As a high school teacher if a child is not academically or socially ready for high school, retention, tutoring in the 8th grade is a good idea. Did your son complete summer school to make up for any classes he did not pass while in 8th grade?
As several have said high school has more expectations than the middle school/ junior high. Once a student is in high school they need to earn credits / or meet competency on common assessments/ state exams in order to graduate from high school. Look at the long term needs of your son, and how he will accomplish them.
Good luck. Also as a parent know what your son is doing, check the district web site and see what his daily grades are, and also what his homework and long term assignments are. Monitor his work, be sure he completes and passes in all work. You may have to ask that the teacher initial his agenda book each day to verify assignments, and then you may initial the page also so the school knows you are aware of his work, and when it is due.
Another thought is some schools have an alternative education program, both for middle school and high school. This might be another possibility for your son, if your school system has an alternative education program.

Be proactive. Good luck to you and your son for a productive, successful school year.

That depends on what happend. Does your son have a learning issue that is not being served approriately or was his failure a motivation (did not do the work- could also be due to undiagnsoed learning issue) or diciplinary (suspensions-expulsion- which is also sometimes due to a learning issue)?

If your son has an issue for which he recieves services, he should not be held back and you should be in negotiations to get him appropriate services and comensatory services to make up for the inappropriate services he had in the 8th grade that allowed failure. If he is not capable of learning enough to be promoted because of his issues, then he should be on an IEP that will accomodate that, such that he learns what is appropriate for him.

The "why" is really important.

M.

Why was he retained? Have you talked to the principal and the school counselor? Pushing him ahead could do more harm than good. Find out why first then go from there.