My Son Is Scared to Poop in the Potty.

My son is 3 as well. He is very excited to go pee in the potty and even says "bye pee" when flushing. But when it comes to pooping in the potty he wants nothing to do with it. Everyone has told me one day he will just start doing it. I'm keeping my fingers crossed, I'm tired of buying diapers :-)

We just went through this with our 3 year old. He decided that poop was yucky and he just wasn't going to do it. We went through the everybody poops concept, but he would just scream Ethan no poop. He would run around screaming my belly hurts, STOP POOP, Stop hurting me. We just made sure he was full of fiber and just reassured him that the pain would stop once he did poop. He eventually stopped crying while pooping. Then we worked on getting him to poop on the potty. He will have an occasional set back. Once he was pooping without pain then we worked on a reward system for pooping on the potty. What does your son love? Mine loves candy. The only way he gets candy is for poop. The first couple of times he could pick out whatever he wanted from his candy basket (candy he got as presents from grandparents at holidays). Now we assess the size of the poop. He enjoys doing it and will tell me if it deserves big candy or just 1 or 2 m&m's. Sometimes he doesn't ask for the candy and then we don't offer.

It's def. something hard to watch your child go through. Especially when they are hurting and you can't make it stop. Hang in there! He will get the hang of it.

This is COMMON.
Do NOT force it.
Constipation... can be a real real problem... because if the child withholds going to poop, it causes GREAT pain, internally. And then it becomes an emotional problem and fear. And it then becomes a vicious cycle.

Just let him poop in a diaper. He is not ready to poop on a toilet.

And, if poop is withheld, it can cause bulging bowels or encopresis.

Yes, just keep letting him go in a diaper. He is scared to poop in a toilet. MANY kids get this way... and pooping in a toilet, comfortably takes time.

We had to see a Pediatric Gastroenterologist, when my daughter had that problem. He said MANY kids go through that... and it can take months to resolve the constipation and associated pain that accompanies it. If need be, ask your Doctor what you can give him, to soften his poop. But do NOT use laxatives or suppositories. The Specialist we saw, does not recommend it because it is habit forming and is only meant for SHORT term use. A couple of times at most.

Feed him fiber, natural apple juice, pear juice, prune juice etc. These help the constipation to soften as well.

talk with him... gently. He is scared to poop because it hurts and he is constipated. Tell him you understand...

all the best,
Susan

My oldest child did the same exact thing(and now my other child)! It was so frustrating so we asked the pediatrician and they put him on Miralax every other day or so and I made sure I gave him things like cereal with fiber and fiber bars. Basically the miralax made it soft and so he couldn't hold it in. It only took a few weeks of him pooping in his diaper again, instead of holding it in and me having to change little poop smears 5 or 6 times a day, and then he started pooping on the potty. Good luck and ask your dr. about the Miralax. I've heard other people say that it can be addictive if you use it for a long time but we did not find this to be true for us since it got him over the hurdle quickly. Once we gave it to him and really started watching his diet, he turned around quite fast and stopped holding it in, we didn't need to use it anymore. And also make sure he's getting enough liquids, that can be making his poops hard too. And if he's super constipated, you can use the liquid glycerin suppositories, they work like a charm in a minute or less.

My kids did this as well, I finally discovered my son was just very private. When he got old enough to get on the toilet alone, wipe himself alone, and finish up - he was perfectly fine and potty trained. He just didn't like to poop in front of me.

Are you sure he's scared? What is it he doesn't like about the toilet? Are you using a fullsized toilet? Is he sitting comfortably? Maybe a different potty seat, or small child size toilet would be more comfortable? Maybe you just need to stick to your guns and tell him he can't get up until he's done.

Have you tried a reward system? My friend had great success with a poster board on the bathroom door for going potty and her daughter got to cover it in stickers. A sticker everytime she went. You could come up with something special for going number 2?

Just brain storming. I hope you get it all worked out :)

I pretty much agree here. But if he's not going in the diaper/pull-up either than I don't know what to say. Do you know what he's scared of specifically? Is he going on a big toilet or a potty chair? Some kids don't like getting splashed (my dd) so going in a potty chair rather than the big toilet helps them to get over this. If you can pinpoint the exact cause of his fear you might be able to think of a solution. good luck!

after years of chronic constipation the pooping was not easy until diapers were gone. i actually waited to nighttime train her until i thought she could understand to move her bowels to stop the pain. we made a big deal about her turning four and losing the diapers. i did 3 enemas per dr orders and then kept her on miralax. i sat her down twice a day for three minutes to try and i stayed with her if she wanted. she hated it. she went in her pants and was so embarrassed that she decided to work with me as much as she could. the first couple of times were tough she fought me but ended up going the toilet which was rewarded. now she goes all the time and she is so proud of herself.

Hello! Why is he afraid to poop in the potty?

We went through this with my son - he had a VERY hard poop so he was afraid to poop again because it hurt.

Help him make pooping easier - fiber, etc. maple syrup is a natural laxative. Help him go at the same time every day - "his morning constitution". Give him a book to read and a glass of water - if you need to sit in there with him - do it. Just make sure that he's going regularly and help make his poops softer so they don't hurt coming out.

Hope this helps!!

Bribe him. Offer his "coupons" (or little tickets from Staples) every time he poops. He can exchange these for TV time or little toys or tricycle rides or whatever. Or he might be scared of falling into the potty (if using the toilet) or not have much support when pooping. An potty insert with built in steps & handle from Mother's Helper was great for my son.

i'm so happy that you are working with him (ie letting him use a pull-up and understanding that fighting it is making him constipated.....way too many people are quick to punish littles for potty issues.) i think you are on the right track backing off from the potty. now makes sure he's getting the right foods to prevent constipation.....plenty of fruits, water and lots of fiber. when the stools are softer it won't hurt, and he'll have a harder time holding it in. stay patient and encouraging, this too shall pass! (literally.)
:) khairete
S.