We lost our mother last summer and my sister has been recently diagnosed with liver cancer. We are not very close but as I am her younger sister (she is 57 and I am 50) I want so much to do something special for her as she faces the fight of her life. She will be entering the hospital on December 14th for a liver resection. The cancer is melanoma that has metastasized from her left eye, which she lost last year. Would love to send her a gift basket for her hospital stay but can not seem to find the right one. Suggestions anyone? PS: She nursed our mother until her death, so the woman truly deserves a break. She lives in Florida and I am in New Hampshire so our distance is more than just age and different points of view.
this seems very tough for all of you. I think just being by her side will he a big help. My MIL passed away from Cancer this past January and all she wanted was family and friends to surround her and give her encouragement. We put tons of pictures of everyone around her...including her late husband.
V.,
So sorry for you family illnesses. Have you seen those digital photos that you can leave an audio message on. Maybe she would like that. Or a CD video of you and your family saying how much you love her? I would make sure you keep card and letters going her way so she knows that you love her and wish her well. Maybe a visit from you if you can. I wish you luck and I know lots of moms here will send you great suggestions!!
D.
I am so sorry for your loss (my mom passed away 10 years ago) and your sisters cancer. Maybe you can have one of those quilts or even a lap quilt made that has photos on it or a design that is meaningful to your sister? can you try and go out and help her once she is home from the surgery? maybe for a week or more? findout what books she likes and send those along with favorite homemade cookies or snacks? send her care packages every other week to let her know you are thinking of her, with her favorite local candy, magazines, inspiring cards and photos you could reprint from your childhood? Best Wishes
Hi V.,
The best gift you can give your sister is yourself. Write her a letter. Say what you said here. Tell her how you pain for her and how you respect what she did for your mom. Tell her you want to now be of assistance to her.
Plan some special time for the two of you together. This time should be all about her. Leave any of your unresolved baggage at the door. A gift is given purely without any expectation of reward. The reward is the satisfaction of comforting another human being. In your case, the reward may be the reestablishing of a relationship. A relationship that you may have to say goodbye to soon.
If there are unresolved issues. Forgive your sister. (I say this simply because that is what is should be) When you ask God for forgiveness, he does, simply and completely. There are no strings attached. Your forgiveness should be the same. Your sister is not perfect and neither are you. I don't know if there are reasons the two of you are not close, but honestly, if there are, let them go. Love her for her humanity in all it's imperfection.
Your sister's illness is an opportunity to love and be loved. What else is there?
J. L.
So sorry for all your family is going through. If you can't make it out to Florida soon, may I suggest a letter to your sister, about anything and everything. I think it's always nice to get a handwritten letter these days, and you never know what thoughts you might have that will touch the both of you.
Dear V.,
I'm very sorry for what you're going through now. I am sure it was difficult to lose your mother and now to have your sister sick too.
I recommend, as others have, visiting her. If you can nurse her for a bit over her surgery, I am sure it would mean a lot to her and may do more for you than you realize. Even if you've never been close, you could gain a lot from the visit now. And as you say, she could certainly use the break.
Good luck.
music and meditation are wonderful tools for those sick and healing.
Go to WWW.HealthJourneys.com here you can find an assortment of 'healing' baskets.
I'm sorry for the loss of your mom and that now your sister is so sick.
Dear V.,
I am sorry to hear of your recent loss. I feel also that you should do everything in your power to be with your sister. I think if things do not go well for her you will never forgive yourself for just sending her a "gift basket". I lost a brother 10 years ago. And although I miss him everyday, I find great comfort in the fact that I was with him.
I wish you the very best of luck! God Bless you and your sister.
Hi V.
I am so sorry about the loss of your mother and your sister's cancer. As a hospice social worker, I would highly recommend a visit if at all possible. Many of our pt's have found music to be very peaceful and relaxing. I also love the idea of the digital picture frame. Some of our pt's have found massages to be helpful. Best wishes to you and your sister.
S.
