My Child Is Potty-trained at Daycare, but Has No Interest with Us. Help!

Just wanted to agree with the other response about the pull-ups- they are a waste of time and money. My daughter just treated them like diapers. Once I put underwear on her it took a day and a half (yes we had to clean up messes and didn't leave the house for two days).
I was waiting until she was ready, trying not to force it or make it a negative experience but then just got to the point where I had to be strong and just do it!

Good Luck :)

He isn't' too young to be potty training. We as a society have just decided to leave it till they are older because it's supposedly easier....

In any case, sounds to me like this is a control issue between you and him, if he goes at school. With my daughter, I just make using the potty an expectation, like brushing her teeth. So, she knows the rules: we go when we get up, we go before we eat, we go before we leave the house. The thing is, you don't ask. You tell him, and then offer options: which potty are you going to use, mommy's or yours? Are you going to take down your pants, or am I? Do you want to collect your toy bag now or after you go potty? If he shows resistance, you ignore it, and then just say, "Ok, I'm going to count to ten and if you haven't decided, then I'm going to decide for you."

Resistance doesn't mean he isn't ready, it means he is being at toddler.

Also, get rid of the pull-ups. Buy some Gerber trainers that hold a bit of the pee, do a big celebration of his successes over the past two months, and tell him he is graduating to being a big boy. Tell him that once he starts putting all his pee and poop in the potty, then he can pick out his undies himself (my daughter wouldn't poop on the potty for me, but elmo underwear motivated her). Find something to motivate him, and then don't turn back. You will have to take him to the potty at the beginning. It won't take you long to figure out the timing, and if he is going at the daycare already, you could ask them how often they take them --they will have a set schedule and it won't be optional!

Throw the pull-ups in the garbage. When he's ready put him in underwear and take him to the bathroom. As long as he has that pull-up he will use it. It's so much easier for him and he certainly realizes he has a choice. If he is really ready, he will train in underwear in about a week. Months in pull-ups is ridiculous. They are the same as diapers only cost you more and are less absorbent.

Have you talked to his teachers at daycare? I would find out what type of potty he prefers, and what rewards they use, if any. Pick their brains to get some details, then try your best to do it at home. I don't think 2.5 is too young for a boy to be potty trained, maybe there is just something he prefers that he gets at school that is lacking at home.

T.

Hey E.,

Hang in there! You will get through this and he WILL potty train! I know how frustrating this can be. Our just-turned 3-year-old has been successfully going in the potty at home and at school for two weeks now. He was very much resistant as well and we just decided to take a stand and say, "it's time to go". He would resist but we would do something similar to the other mom that responded and count. If we reached three it was a timeout. We were very much for letting the child lead but one day I just felt he was ready. He was becoming very uncomfortable whenever he would go in his pull-up.

So, we took a weekend and when he woke up, we told him no more pull-ups. We told him he could only wear the pull-ups at night. Then, we set the timer for every 30 minutes and had him try every time the timer went off. He resisted, BUT he peed in the potty every single time! Also, at first he held his poop. So, to motivate him, I asked him about something that he really really wanted. He said that he really wanted a "big blue truck". So, together, we made a cut-out of a truck (really I am no artist but he knew what it was) and put it on our refrigerator. We have sticker letters. We pulled out the letters that spell the word "TRUCK" and put them in a little bowl on the counter. (Start with a small word first). Every time he pooped, he got to pick a letter and stick it on his truck. When he spelled the whole word, we went to the toy store and he got to pick out his big blue truck! (It was not very expensive and totally worth every penny!) It worked like a dream. Now we are onto a new reward, this time it's a little longer. Eventually, we will phase this out. He really responded well to working for a reward! We keep the "chart" at eye-level on the refrigerator so he sees it often. When he was finished with his truck chart, we put it on his bedroom door (his wall of fame) so he can see it and be proud of his hard work! :)

In two weeks now, we've only had one accident! He has also had dry pull-ups at night!

Good luck!!

K.

I got a singing potty at Target and my daughter loves it. She dashes off to sit on it and make it sing.

I think you that if you went "cold turkey" and got rid of the training pants it would be the most effective. Toddlers need pratice to learn when they need to go(send the message to their brain).It is difficult for them to learn that it time to stop and go potty. It will be a hard lesson to learn for both child and parents but after a couple days (and serveral changes of clothes) it's done! Do it on a weekend. Always stay upbeat and do not disciplane the child for accidents but rather encourage them to do better next time. A reward chart worked for us. After say 5 checks he got a small toy (hot wheel car), trip to McD's and the final prize was a movie or you could throw a little "congrats" prizza party.
At 2.5 he is a little ahead of the game so don't discount that either, and it's great that he does it at daycare first - I had the opposite experience so I think that you are in a great situation.