My 21 Month Old Keeps Sticking Her Hands down My Shirt

My son did this constantly between 18 and 24 months. I nursed until 16 months. It is definitely a phase. He still does it occasionally when he is tired and needs reassurance. My advice is to calmly tell your daughter "out of mommy's shirt please" and take her hand out. Persistence over resistance! If she has a "lovey", maybe steer her towards it during those times. My son did it to everyone he felt close to, grandparents, aunts, uncles, even his little sister! They all thought it was a compliment that he felt so comfortable with them, but I know it is slightly embarrassing out in public! Good luck and remember, this too shall pass!
J.

T.,

My son (now 5 yo) did that too, esp when he was getting tired. He would pat me down and then start pulling my shirt up. Sometimes, he'd give me little squeeze too, which could get a little embarrassing in front of other people! I started gently moving his hands away, then I'd kiss his hands, give him something else to hold, and give him a really loving cuddle. The key was making him feel like he getting something that fulfilled the same need while discouraging the other behavior. Sometimes just kissing his hands was enough to distract him.

Believe me, one day you'll look back on this with nostalgia and a little tear! Good luck!

My son did this too but I thought it was because he was breastfed until much later (almost 3). I suppose it is still her source of comfort as you correctly noted. You can say "Mommy doesnt feel confortable like that" and then offer an altnerative thing to do. Just saying no to her isnt enough and she will feel like its she who is getting the no (little kids cant seperate the action with the person sometimes). SO stating your needs here might help. Or better you can say "People dont like having hands in their shirts". At this age, they are just learning social grace and although they can understand the reason, they can understand that its not done.

Good luck. Oddly I almost miss that hand in the shirt even if at the time I was mortified.

I feel for you my son also had that problem when he was younger. I just had to keep pulling his hand out when he would put in down my shirt until he finally got the hint. I would not tell him no, I would just pull it out gently and put it somewhere less embarrassing. I also would try to explain to him about private space when we were alone so that he could try to understand out my private space. Even so every once in a while he still trys.