My Son Can't Keep His Hands off My Chest! Anyone Else Been Through This?

Mine did this too. I just began calmly removing his hand and telling him "No. That bothers Mama." Then, if he tried again just because he knew it bothered me, a firm no with a firm removal of or a swat to the hand followed. He got the message and hasn't tried to do it in a long while. It's also a good excuse to have the conversation about private areas of the body and good touching vs. bad touching. It's so important they know this at any age. Some areas are just off limits no matter how innocent the intention is.

My son started the same thing at about the same age. He is just learning about different body parts, etc. I have taken the opportunity to tell him, "No, we don't do that. That's private to momma." He's stopped it and is now where when he notices my chest, he's say, "That's private." That lays a great foundation on teaching him his private parts and that no one else should touch them except for momma and daddy when we are cleaning him and wiping him. He's totally stopped.

Congrats on nursing so long!
Yes, his hands going down your shirt could have something to do with him nursing longer. IF you let him lift your shirt or play or whatever while nursing, it may be a bit of a holdover from that.
Phase? Possibly. I would continue to try to curtail the behavior so that it doesn't last as long.
He may be looking for more cuddle time or attention from you....just a shot in the dark.
He's almost old enough to start understanding what's okay at home and what's okay when you're out.
I'd just keep firmly saying "Hands don't belong in Mommy's shirt. Can we hold hands?" or something like that.
I try to not say "no" as much as I can....kinda following the lifeguards saying "WALK!" instead of "no running!" because kids never seem to hear the "no" part :-)

HTH and that it makes sense. Please email me if you have any questions.

K., mama to
Catherine (5.5y) who nursed until 2.5y
Samuel (2.5y) who nursed until about 3mos ago
Baby, due to arrive soon!

It's so nice and warm in there. Hahaha! Really, though...if you want him to stop, give him another place to put his hands that is more "friendly". ;) Maybe you could teach him to put both of his hands on your face and say, "I love you" or something.

It's hard for us to just "give up" something; so, whenever you want to stop a bad habit, replace it with a good one. That goes for adults and kids! :)

It is a natural response, a 'safety blanket' if you will. Smile and say no remove his hand and then wear a little something exrta so when he pulls it down you aren't completely exposed!

Just train him and divert!

Good luck.

Hi N.,
My little girl did the same thing when I first stopped nursing. I do remember it took a little bit for her to stop but I would just tell her no and take her hand away. I did it nice but firmly. I also gave her lots of hugs and told her to hug mommy. It will be fine. It was akward but it will end. :-)

My youngest boy did this. I just tell him it is not appropriate and move his hands away. Don't make a big deal out of it. He will outgrow this, but he needs your help to do so. If he thinks it is okay, he will keep doing it.

I haven't read any of the other responses you got so I could be just repeating. I wouldn't worry about it right now. My daughter never did this, but my son did. I nursed him till he was almost 2. He always would put his hand on my other breast while I was nursing him. When he weaned himself, he started soothing himself when tired by puting his hand up his own shirt and touching his own nipple (my friends thought this was so weird and funny, but he didn't have a pacifier attachment or any other major attachment but was so used to havening a hand under a shirt while falling asleep). So, when it couldn't be my shirt, it was his own. He too would put his hand either up or down my shirt all the time in public or private. He is 3 and a half now and has matured so much in the last 6 months. He never does it to me anymore, and only occasionaly to himself now.

Nursing him that long is probably why he does that...its a comfort thing for him my sister nursed her son until he was 18 mon. she stopped because it was getting painful but he was not ready so once she quit he would play with her nipple when he was tired or if he was laying with her...he would even try it with my mom and myself....so i think its just a comfort thing that he will grow out of but because he is almost 3 you should be able to tell him that your chest belongs to you and he needs to not put his hand down your shirt....i have to say though kudos to you for nursing that long i could only do it until my daughter was 16 mons then it got really uncomfortable...good luck!

N.,

My oldest nurse until she was around 2, and I remember her doing that. At 2 1/2, we were at a wedding, and another guest was holding her as we were chatting, and she reached down the front of HER dress! I was rather embarrassed, but the woman chuckled, and commented, "she must be a breast-fed baby."

He'll grow out of it. . . just give him time.

M.

N., my son (now 5) did the same. Face it, he is a boob man and he probably always will be.
With my son I thought it was quite healthy and normal until he was 3 and then in public it became a bit awkward (mostly for others - it caused a fight between my mom and me about what is "acceptable and appropriate").
I am a very hands on Mommy and I want my kids to feel good about showing affection, but I did have to put a stop to the hand down the shirt thing. I would just gently pull it out each time and say "nope, no more milk. You're a big boy now!" That did the trick within a few weeks.
He still tries to sneak his arm down my shirt every once in while but I have to just remind him and he sort of slyly smiles. The good thing is that your son loves you and feels safe enough with you to demonstrate his affections, the hard part sometimes for me is the transition where they are no longer your babies and you must prepare them for the bigger world as "little men"...
D.

I nursed my boys for 2 and 3 years. Both boys did the same thing...they found great comfort in touching my breast well after they were weaned. For them it was a transition from nursing in which they found great comfort. I didn't allow them to touch my nipple and I had to teach them what was acceptable and where. It does not last ~ I assure you. My 14 year old is very well adjusted and my 8 year old ~ though he still talks abut nursing would not ever put his hand in my shirt. Do what works for you and have appropriate boundaries.

At my daughters preschool (4 yr old) there was a little boy who did it all the time to EVERY female. At first it was shocking and then it became funny. Most people moved away, gently said no, his teacher would often ignore it. Around 4 1/2 yrs his mother started having real conversations about personal space and he would come to school and actively talk/work on personal space. It was so cute. Anyway, of course he left with no more touching problems. Don't panic, even if it takes time to get him to understand.

Hi N.,

My 2.5 year old does this too. I nursed until 18mos, and it wasn't a terrible transition, either. He likes to fall asleep on my belly, too. It is uncomfortable and embarrassing when he reaches into my shirt. But you know, I just say, "I'd rather you not do that." And I hope he gets over it.

I asked him the other day, "Where's my love?" expecting him to point to himself, but instead he answered, "In your belly and your teeters." which was his affectionate name for my breasts. So he associates them with love. It was kind of sweet.

I'm with you in thinking they'll grow out of it. In the mean time, just be firm about no more touching there. It is never too early to just say honestly why you don't want to be touched there. Someday he'll get it.

My daughter still does this also. I breastfed her until 2. Sometimes she even tries to kiss them :) Now that is awkward. If it doesn't bother you, just try to teach him when it is appropriate and not. I am sure they will get over it soon.

Hi N., I believe that your son knows that he used to nurse and he remembers that he found comfort and nourishment at your chest. He may not be trying to get to your breasts, but to feel the skin where he felt comfort. Dont tell him that is wrong, just hug him close and tell him he is a sweet boy and you love him. Plus, he can feel that your chest feels different than daddy or himself so he is noticing the difference. =)