My 15 Month Old Little Girl

Force her separation from you & the other kids by putting her in a pack & play or crib. EVERY time she does it.

We've been going through this with our 20 month old grandson too. We just make him sit for a little bit and tell him no over and over. They will get it eventually. In the meantime, break out the portable crib and make her play in it quite often. The other kids don't deserve to be treated this way and she'll figure things out eventually.

my littlest DD is 14 months, she sometimes slaps & pulls the hair of my girlfriends 3 year old. I do not think she really understands, that it hurts. I have to repeatedly stop her and move her on to something else & she goes right back and does it again. She "knows" it gets me, kind of like a few "naughty" things she does, because she looks to see what my reaction will be, and if I say "no", she cries. (she hates hearing "no", regardless of how sweetly I say it, and even cries when I say "nose" while touching her nose!) I think at this age, they understand that it hets a reaction, but dont understand why, and they like to test to see if they will get the reaction. I have never put her in "time out", there is no way she would understand that just yet. Just my opinion.

aggression seems to be her only way of getting noticed, or making her ANNOUNCEMENT. if she isn't fully talking yet (and I have a 23mo who doesn't talk too much) she may have resorted to these behaviors to really work out her feelings. And they may not all be negative, she just doesn't know how ELSE to relay her message.

Slapping you is a communication. At 15mo, she doesnt know the full extent to how wrong that is or what offense that is. She's trying to communicate. "I'm mad"... "NO I don't want to" or "stop" etc. When she slaps you, try and figure out the context and see if you can take her hands hold her wrists tightly and say firmly "nooooo _____, hands are NOT for hitting" then loosen your grip and say "Hands are for love" and embrace her hands. Then see if you can practice teaching her the words "im mad" or "sad", sorry" and so on to replace hitting.

I read a book about this when my oldest daughter went through this phase around age 2. Worked wonders. (and she was a full-on talker from almost 9mo!!! lol so lack of communication wasn't the problem, she was just an aggressive child)

Be consistent!

I know its so hard not to be angry and flat out offended and feel oppressed when I child HITS you, but take a deep breath and remember, this is a life thing and it CAN and will snowball. Nipping it in the butt now (gently) will stop it in its tracks and it could take you being consistent 20 times before you see results but she'll eventually back down!

Also, makes a lot of sense that with THREE older siblings, she could already be feeling very inferior and this is her way of saying "I'm big too!"... and I have to say, that for a 15mo, that is a pretty awesome character and personality... to have that much drive, confidence and motivation. She doesn't cower or run away or become shy. Seems she WILL, in her own way, tell you how she feels and isn't afraid to do it no matter how big you are.

Imagine her at age 8 on the soccer field, age 12 already leading group science projects and in high school running for class president.

=)

a child who slaps, whether they be a boy or a girl, needs to be told in no uncertain terms that slapping the woman who gave birth to you is not acceptable,period. my daughter slapped me..ONCE, i then put her down on the floor immediately and told that i would pick her back up when she decided not to do it again, she got the clue.
K. h.

She is wanting to be involved in play with her older siblings and lacks the al skills to actually do it. Give her attention before she gets to that point and engage her with play she can do. Teach the older children to play with her at her level for a bit. Of course you can't let her slap you, hold her hands gently so she can't and remove her from the situation. She will keep you quite busy for the next bit until she gets old enough to play with the older children, but don't worry, she will grow up also.

When animals are trained, the negative behavior is ignored and the positive behavior is reinforced. It sounds like she would like the other children to play with her and may feel left out. Either have her play with the other children or play something else with her and then praise her if she plays nicely.

Try to remember if she has been spending time around other people. Thus tHing the chance she's been exposed to something.

Most kids hit, especially ones who don't get spanked for major offenses (like hitting) after one calm warning (one swat, never angry) so it's always funny to see the non spanking parents wonder where the child "learned it". All the kids I know (huge family) who get swatted on the hand or butt with a firm "no" when they first try it, do not hit other kids. None of my kids hit because they never tried it more than once successfully, nor did my brother or I when we were kids. Whereas my non spanking friend's kids are always hitting mine and even hitting their PARENTS! WHAT??!!

It's what they do. She's doing it because she gets away with it, not because she learned it somewhere. It can be disciplined. If time outs and removal don't stop the hitting, I would firm up. You don't want her hitting other kids. It's something you can nip immediately. If anything is taking longer than that, it's because she doesn't care to avoid it. She is WAY old enough to control it if she has to. The theories claiming the impulse control isn't there are the ones whose methods don't deter the behavior.

If she doesn't want the consequence, a "no" from you is all it will take when you see their little hand raised to strike or pull hair. Very handy at the park, daycare, wherever. Nice not to have to hover or worry about it.