I would just like to know if any of you moms have experienced your 1+ year old children have started to NOT sleep through the night? He will go to bed, then by as early as 12:30am he will wake up and not want to go back to sleep unless his me or his dad is in the room. Everytime we think he has fallen back to sleep and start to leave his room he will wake up and start to cry. We will try for at least an hour, then will just bring him to bed with us. Which I know is not a good thing to start, but I am 3 months pregnant and just want my sleep. He doesn't do this every night, sometimes he will go a whole week without waking up at all. Please give me some insight, to let me know I am not alone on this. Thank you.
M., my son is 16 months and we go thru this battle constantly!! He loves to cuddle, so he will do anything to get to us and get some snuggle time. I have been told to let him cry it out since he is "training us" to get up and get him. We have worked really hard to let him cry it out, but sometimes it's more important to sleep. I wish you the best of luck because we are going thru this too. You are not alone!
As soon as we get a good schedule working, something changes it - teething, a growth spurt, daylight savings, etc. :) Our 20 mo old sleeps through about 5 nights a week. We went through a terrible time a month ago where she was up every night for 2 weeks - ugh - and someone recommended The No-Cry Sleep Solution. There's one for babies and one for toddlers. I'm not a fan of CIO, and this seems to have some good suggestions. Our daughter has been doing better lately, and I don't know if it's the hints from the book or she's just settled into a new rhythm. Good luck and hang in there!
I would say check for teething first. But I went though this with two of my sons. The first one I let him come in to bed with me or I would stay with him until he fell a sleep. This I am sorry to say last until he was 5 and I was pregnant with his brother and decided it had to stop or I would be getting up with two. So I started walking him back to his room and told him to go to sleep and I would be back in a few minutes.
With the second when I found myself falling into the same trap I nipped it in the bud. I went in when he cried settled him down and told him I would be back in a few minutes. I would let him cry for a little while then do the same thing. Each time in creasing the time I let him cry.
I'm so sorry your having to deal with this. My daughter started doing the same thing at about 18 months so I have felt your pain. I did what you did. I'd go into her room, reassure her and wait for her to go back to sleep. The minute I'd leave her room, she was right back up, calling out "Mama! Mama!" So I'd bring her to bed with me. At first it seemed to work, but there were issues. She feels the need to sleep with her head in my back and her feet in Daddy's back or his neck. We have a pillow top matress set and even though, the bed frame is as low to the floor as it will go, the bed sits up high. She's fallen out of our bed twice and was very unhappy about it both times. Sometimes she would wake up before Daddy and I, safely climb down from the bed, and proceeded to remove all our clothes from the bottom dresser drawers, or dump all the jewely out of my jewel box, and generally just run amock until her father or I woke up and stopped her. We decided that she has to learn to sleep in her own bed. Now when she wakes up in the middle of the night we go in her room, comfort her, make sure she's okay, make sure she has her pacifier, tell her it's time to sleep, and go back to our own bed and let it be. On occasion she'll cry or wimper a bit, but she usually will go to sleep in short order (5-15 minutes) and stay asleep for the rest of the night. At first she'd get so mad and cry and scream "Mama! Mama!" It was like for torture for all of us. But I stuck to my guns (my husband and I both had to talk each other out of bringing her to our bed more than once) and now the torture seems to have ended. From time to time we have one of those nights where she wakes up screaming it seems every hour on the hour, but fortunately, they are few and far between. It's not easy, but stick to your guns and it'll work out. Good luck and God bless you.
Of course it is possible that 1-year-old children are manipulative, but it is also possible that they are hurting or scared. Many people have suggested putting your foot down and letting him cry, which is always an option. But you want your son to know that you are willing to comfort him at night also, and not just during the day. I don't know what you should do - every child and every parent is so different from another - but consider your own nighttime fears from your past. I for one used to be so scared of the dark (I still am to some extent), and making me cry in the dark wouldn't have been an effective way to help me deal with that fear.
He is perfectly normal. Sometimes this happens, growth spurt, teething, whatever. Sometimes children regress when there's another on the way.
There's nothing at all wrong with sleeping with your child. Here are some great articles on the advantages of co-sleeping.
http://www.naturalchild.org/articles/sleeping.html
You are not alone. My son is 6 years old and finally sleeps through 5 nights out of 7 each week. His schedule is 9:00-6:00 but wakes up half way through the night but I'm not complaining, until about a year ago he was up 3-4 times a night. It will get better, your little guy is changing from day to day so his habits will also.
Good luck,
D.
You have to be confident and firm, tell him goodnight, and leave. You have to let him cry. If he can make this a regular thing, he will. And when he gets bored with it, he'll come up with something new. We've all been there. Sorry. Very sorry - but it's the only way. Believe me now or believe me later. You can make it complicated and agonize over it -- or not. It's your choice.
That little guy has your number - he gets to sleep in the big bed with mom and dad. Our kids did this too, and your right when all you want to do is sleep the easiest thing to do is put them in you bed and got back to sleep. But if you don't nip this in the bud now your really going to have some problems later. My SIL mad this mistake and was still batteling it when her daughter was 8 years old (that is a little extrem - but hey, it happens). When we whent though this we just picked a Friday night and let the crying begin. If she woke up we would check on her, give her a kiss back in her bed she went. Then I'd stand in the hall and listen to her cry. Hardest thing I have ever done!! But after a few nights it stopped. Now if she worked herself up into a real frenzy I'd go in, calm her down and back in the bed. But she did not leave that room. But when she first woke up I would always check on her, I wanted both my kids to always know if you need me I'll be there. And to this day (they are 5 & 7) they have no problem with getting me up in the night if they need something and I don't mind that. But they know - your not getting in my bed. There's not not enough room in a queen size bed for 2 adults and kids. And keep in mind - no matter what you are going through today it will get better. Just pray your way through it and in a few years your going to laugh about it. Good luck with the little guy and the new baby - enjoy them!!
Sleep is important, security is important and if sleeping together accomplishes this - DO IT! :) Whoever helped you "know this was not a good thing to start" is full of themselves. We don't permanently co-sleep but always allow it if needed - for any reason. We have 5 healthy, happy children.
I have an 17 month old who is also doing this. I think it might be his molars coming in though- teething is always hard to tell, but hind sight I think it has been the problem of most of our sleep disturbances. Anyway, it could be anxiety in your case as he cries when you leave the room.
Is he still teething? He could be sick? I think its just a phase, he will get over it. I dont let me kids scream in the middle of the night either, they come to bed with me if they do. =)
