My 11 Year Old Is Food Hoarding

Can you dig a little deeper with him? At 11 he can reason. I don't allow my kids to give me "I don't know" answers about anything. They have to come up with something to help me help them.

If he has bad ADHD, does he take a snack to his room and just forget it? That would be my first guess. Because that's what we ADD people do. I start with a cup of tea and I can't find it anywhere, then I forget about it, then I find it in the microwave when I go to heat up the next cup of tea I made that cooled off because I got busy doing something else while it was cooling off and now I have two cups of tea, so I set one aside to finish the other....and I do this many times a week. I'm not hoarding tea....I just forget that I had one going.

Yes, he needs professional counseling. Hoarding is an anxiety based disorder that can also be an offshoot of OCD. It can be rather hard to overcome, so the earlier you can get some help the better.

His hoarding food likely has NOTHING to do with actual food.

Your pediatrician can likely refer you to a good child psychologist. I would start there.

Food Hoarding in this situation is not unusual.

You must know his history. If it was an unstable home life, or being passed around or neglected.. This is his way to survive. May be there were times he went hungry, or was not sure if there was going to be food for the next meal.

Yes, I suggest counseling and i hope that you will also seek more information on his past. Maybe even a little family counseling so you all can just come up with some techniques on how to communicate.

Let him know this is now his home. he does not have to hide food in his room.

Explain the reason we have rules about no food and drinks in our rooms, is because bugs are attracted, even to empty wrappers.I am also clumsy, so there is no way I could have food or drinks.. other than water in my room.. Instead he is welcome to eat in the kitchen. He is welcome to make a snack when he is hungry.

Maybe even mention to him, that when he is hungry and about to serve himself something, to also ask others in the house, if he can get them something also.. They may also be hungry..
You and your husband can do the same with him..

Sometimes, i like a small bowl of cereal at night. Or a cup of unsweetened tea and a few cookies. I always ask if anyone else wants something from the kitchen.

Is he hiding it, hoarding it, or being a careless tween taking food into his room and not finishing it? That would be the key. If he's just being a normal, forgetful kid, that's one thing, but if it's something where he feels like he has to have it hidden or keep it in his room in stock, then maybe some counseling would help him deal with whatever insecurities may be generating the behavior. He may not be able to articulate why he's doing it if it's not forgetfulness.

There is nothing wrong with your ADHD son. And he's not "hoarding," he's hiding it.

I did the same thing (I have ADD) and my boys did it too (they both have ADHD/ADD). It's not anxiety or OCD. He's just hungry at odd times. Especially if he's on a stimulant medication, which has a side effect of being an appetite suppressant. So he'll be hungry when the meds wear off.

Here are a few things that might help:

1. Make the rule: "No food is allowed in your room. We eat at the table."
2. Talk to him. Let him know that if he asks, and it's not right before a meal, you will say yes to a snack. Be he needs to let you know what he's eating (tummy filling foods that put meat on his bones, not junk).
3. He's hungry but doesn't know that HE can make/get something HIMSELF and have it at the table. Is this because you and Dad make/get all food for the kids? He should be able to make an entire meal for himself at this age. Scrambled eggs, mac and cheese, grilled cheese sandwiches (that's what my 9 year old is cooking currently).
4. Make healthy snacks readily available. A bowl of apples on the counter in the kitchen. Bananas. Low sugar granola bars (any more than 8-9g per bar is too much sugar...Nutrigrain bars have WAY too much sugar). A small bowl of Frosted Mini Wheats (the off-brand has less sugar) WITH milk. A glass of milk (very filling). A piece of toast with peanut butter on it. A "quesadilla" (two small flour tortillas, shredded cheese inside, microwave on high for 30 seconds).
5. Sneaking is lying, and lying is unacceptable behavior. Work with him so that he does not put himself in that situation, but don't let it slip when he does (I hope that makes sense).
6. Put a trash can in his room. It's likely that he'll "forget" and an apple core or wrapper will end up in his room. Punish the fact that he's breaking the rule of eating away from the table, NOT that he's getting food. And say "thank you for putting it in the trash, but you know you're supposed to eat at the table and put food trash in the kitchen bin."

Hope all that helps! Let me know if you need any other advice.

Is he actually hoarding or does he start to eat something and then move on to something else and forget about what he had already started? We find food wrappers all over the place and partially eaten food and it is because my son will start eating one thing and then he either forgets about it or looses interest and will move on to something else. When we call him on it, "hey, are you done with the cheese you just took 2 bites of and left on the kitchen floor because if you are, you need to throw it away." And the response is usually, "oh yeah, I forgot I was eating it, no I still want it." It is a constant battle keeping food in the kitchen with him because he is always on the run and sneaks it out with him. If you can, set the rule that food cannot leave the kitchen.

I disagree with the poster below. I would not let it go if he's not overweight -- Someone who binges but doesn't gain weight is also a candidate for bulimia. I don't know that this is hoarding -- but it is him trying to make his own decisions about what, how much, and where he eats. Can you open up choices for him by making him part of the family menu process -- if he has a say and role in making dinner, perhaps he'll know what's coming and make wise choices (with some guidance) leading up to it. If he's hungry and restricted from taking snacks when he wants, that may be a part of it. But I remember choosing my own snacks and it was always cookies, chips, everything bad -- it would be good to provide a lot of healthy choices, include him in the shopping and cooking, and then sit back and watch what happens.

Is he actually hiding the food or just not eating all that he brings into his room? Do you have a rule that he not take food into his room but yet he does? Depending on the answers to these questions he may have an emotional need. If he's actually hiding food and you haven't said he can't take food into his room then he may have an emotional problem that needs to be evaluated by a child psychologist/psychiatrist. Ask his pediatrician for a referral. Note: if he's not to have food in his room he may be hiding it so that he won't get in trouble.

My grandchildren often have food in their rooms. They take it in to snack on and don't finish eating it.

Is he overweight? If he is not, then I suggest you let it go. Frankly, I think it's perfectly normal. It's common for boys to like to eat lots of junk food. If you throw out my son's bedroom trash can, it's 95% old food and food wrappers -- and he's not overweight and his room is relatively clean. I don't know why you would consider food in a bedroom "hoarding." Both my boys' biggest desire when they were teens was to have a mini fridge in their room. (They didn't get one though.) It's a boy thing.

Unless he's overweight, this is not the kind of thing to make an issue out of. Focus on things that really matter.