Military Mammas

Being a military wife full time or part time you have to learn to be your own person. By this I mean you have to become independent of hubby and do things on your own. It is nice to want to tell him everything that happens in your day but that is not feasible.

As a couple of your posters mentioned the log/blog is a good way for hubby to catch up on all that you and the kids do.

Think of the time hubby is away as your me time. Do the things you want to do without him around and do them. Go to the chick flick with the girls, get the nails/hair done, have a lunch with a friend. Send kids off to the daycare for a few hours or a playdate. You have to become creative and think really outside the box in order to get through these times when hubby is not there.

It's a question of what would you do if hubby were not here any moer? How would you cope? Then do the things that you would have to do to make it go right. Being a military wife is not easy and you can't be a clinging vine to make it work.

You have to have an independent streak to survive. I have been an active duty wife for over 20 years and now am a retired military wife. There were times when hubby was away a year and I sure as hell wanted to know what went on but it was by letter back then and the letters took 6 weeks to get there. Phone calls were rare and they were timed for about 5 minutes - can't get everything said in that time just the basics of I love you and miss you.

Take up a hobby for the slow time and be yourself a woman. You will do fine just don't dwell on I miss him so much and look into how when he is not there you can do your thing.

Have a good year.

The other S.

PS They miss you but they have a job to do and are doing it to the best of their ability. You are his biggest cheerleader and supporter but you are also a person so don't lose yourself.

My husband is in the Guard too. He actually left last night for his weekend. It does suck :(

But, I try to stay busy, do things with our daughter, get some cleaning done, etc. It's just a few days, we can make it :) I also enjoy a couple nights of having the bed (and covers!) all to myself! hehe

Maybe you can text him when you want to tell him something? Or maybe email him? So that he can read it when he gets the chance, but you don't forget to tell him!

My daughter loves to draw. Maybe your son could draw a picture of something you did together while Daddy was gone. Then he can give it to Daddy when he gets home.

It isn't easy being weekend warrior or full-time. It is still something that breaks up your routine and you miss the routine and each other.
I have been the wife of a deployed soldier (fulltime), had him home but gone for training and now nat'l guard.
I find things to keep busy or projects that I wouldn't get done with him home. It also helps to find other families in similiar situations. Either ones in guard unit, single parents or moms where husband works long hours. Doing stuff together that you may not brave as just one parent. It even makes a trip to the zoo more exciting.
I wish I could say it gets easier after 7 years. But you do get more used to it. not that I am looking forward to my husbands upcoming month training, but I know we will get through it because we have others.

I've been there too, it was really hard. I hate being away from my hubby, and it sucks when it's just you and the kiddo. Just try and distract, distract, distract!

I used to plan fun things for my son and I during the times that he was gone. He was active so he was gone alot, weeks at a time, etc. but we had fun going to the zoo, and museums things like that. Do stuff that you want to do. Clean the house, do some special play dates with some good friends, find a sitter for a few hours so you can have YOU time, and go get a pedicure or something girly and fun for you. You deserve that time too.

Whenever I got bummed cause I wanted to tell him something our son did, I would write it down. I kept up Notepad on the computer all day long, so that whenever I thought of something, or babe did something I would type it out real fast so I wouldnt forget, and then when he did eventually come home it was like a little diary of random and sometimes hilarious things and that made hubby happy too. My son loves to sit on my lap at the computer so he would band his little hands on the keys and "type" too, so that was cool for my husband to see as well.

It's hard but he will be back before you know it! Just focus on having fun with your son right now, and focus on the good things and time will fly!

Best wishes!

Do you call every 5 mins when he is at work? This is just another extended and not fun for you work weekend. It stinks - especially because they really aren't available to chat or talk. I don't mean to sound harsh, But guess what, that's not just the military. My DH travels for work all the time (once or twice every six weeks or so). When he is flying I can't call him or talk to him. Depending on what he is out of town for, he will be busy from first thing in the morning and then late into the night entertaining clients -- so I might not even hear from him that day and I can't call unless it's an emergency because I know he is in meetings all day long. It's not about being too in love with your hubby. If you want to share things with him, keep a running list that you can share with him when he gets back. I'm sure he'll get a kick out of the fact that you think about him so much and it will keep your mind busy. Plan things you want to do -- things you might not get to if he was there. Stay up late and watch movies with the kids (it's only once a month and they probably miss Dad too). Spend time at the playground, invite a single pal over to chat. Keep busy and the time will fly by -- he is busy while he is gone too.