B.L.
Just a little known fact on Bankruptcy, since the laws on bankruptcy had changed, you might still have to pay back debts, but in a longer time period. Lawyers of course have to have upfront fees, since this is bankruptcy and they want to make sure the services they provide will be paid for. I know the fees are pretty stiff, but if it means having a peace of mind due to no collectors calling you , 10,000 notices in the mail being sent to you, then I think it is all worth it.
Have you ever watched the Suze Orman show? I think you should, and also, try to go on her website regarding so called debt management services. Some of them do charge you fees also.
And, I was just looking at the ages of your kids, maybe try getting a job yourself to help out in the finances. Your kids are pretty old now, where the teenager can help with the other two...