Here's the situation... My 6 month old has Just started having problems sleeping (up 3-4 time a night). He shares a room with my 2 1/2 year old. We go get him right away because my 2 1/2 year old is a light sleeper and we don't want our 6 month old to wake him. We want to start letting our 6 month old cry for a little while at night (5-10 min). He obviously can't sleep in the same room as our 2 1/2 year old. We only have three rooms - the boys room/ our room/ and our living room-study. They can't be in the same room, if we put the 2 yr old in our room he will hear the baby through he monitor, if we put the baby in our room that voids the concept of letting him cry (I think). The study-living room is small and pretty filled with furniture not to mention the boys go to sleep before us and that's where we are after they go to sleep. My question - who sleeps where? Please help with as many scenarios as you can.
Thanks for all the responses. First off there is nothing wrong with the baby - he is not currently teething, is perfectly normal during the day it is an only at night problem. My child is a very happy kid and super secure! I checked all the "normal" things first. As to the people who belive the "cry it out" is bad, please don't judge me, I'm not judging you! This is what works for me and my family - worked great for my 1st, and it WILL work for my 2nd! I am NOT a bad mom!! We chose to move some furniure around in the living room-study to nake a little nook for the playpen. He cried for only about 3 minutes last night, and was right back out. We just weren't able to do that in the boys room. Now once he gets past the 3 minutes of crying, and sleeps through the night again, he will be back in his room. I'm guessing only a week or two. Thanks!
I would move the baby back into my own room. I don't believe in the "let them cry" method at all. I believe my job as a mom is to make my baby comfortable both physically and emotionally. It is easier to tell what is wrong and to make them feel safe when they are close to you.
K.,
I don't believe anyone is judging you. The cry it out method has come under some very strong criticism and has even been revised recently by Dr Ferber himself. There are many people who try to let their kids cry it out without educating themselves first. That is why moms are so passionate about it.
That being said... my second woke once a night for quite a while because she didn't eat her solids well and was genuinely hungry. If I fed her, she would go right back to sleep and the whole house wouldn't be woke up. She broke herself of this night feeding all by herself.
Remember that you should do what works best for you and your family so you can all get some sleep at night. Kids break themselves of what some consider "bad habits" on their own. You know you will never see a 10 year old needing to be rocked to sleep... hehe
Good luck and know that this site can be a life saver if you remember that everyone is really trying to help you and/or your baby.
C.
I just want to remind you that your 6 month-old is most likely A. teething (which is painful, and they need comforting through that period), and B. starting to experience separation anxiety (also painful, and they also need comforting through this period). One phase is physical, the other is emotional, but their common thread is that they are both necessary developmental phases for a baby. I suggest putting his crib/bed in your bedroom because you are going to be hearing his cries during the night through the monitor anyways. Letting him sleep in your room will be providing security, which he needs for both of those phases...and you can keep your oldest child in his bedroom so he doesn't get his sleep interrupted.
sounds like your room is best bet. Fake a wall. Hang a sheet or soething as a divider. Crying out worked well for us. As others said make sure nothing is wrong first. My children are emotionally secure and sleep through the night. It's good to be there for them, but they need to gain their own confidence as well.
If your little one was sleeping all night before I would try and address why they are getting up now. It could be that they need a little more food before they go down for the night. My my little one started doing this I gave him a bit of rice cereal and some fruit before bed and this really helped with the sleep issues. Does your wee one still sleep alot during the day? if that is so you might have to adjust their sleep schedule by waking them up some during the day so that they will sleep longer at night. My children are 9 years apart and they slept in the same room after abt a month. I know that this can be a difficult scernerio be I would keep the children together. Thye will adjust and this could be a just a very short term issue.
For now I would move the baby to your room. Until you can figure out why he has stopped sleeping through the night.
I would concentrate on the reason your son is getting up. Feed him cereal before bedtime or maybe you are feeding him cereal already and his tummy doesn't like it? If you are feeding him cereal lay off it at night and give him extra milk instead? Juggle different things to help. If he is hungry then letting him cry won't resolve the issue. If he wants attention it will resolve it.
If you come to see that having him in there with you is making it hard to let him cry then you need to leave the room and go into your living room while he cries. And remember that with this method you HAVE to be consistent and not give in. You also might try some 'white noise' sometimes that will help to soothe them. Good luck!
Six months is a typical age of a growth spurt. He could be hungry.
We are trying to figure this out too as we have a 2.5 yr old and a newborn on the way. While we do have 2 more bedrooms they are on the first floor and we don't feel comfortable having a kid sleep downstairs. I agree with the have baby in your room and let them cry I think. Not sure what we will do yet though in that situation. We plan on having baby in our room for 2 months, then we will figure it out.
We do the cry it out method while the baby sleeps in our room. We didnt want to move her over to her sisters room until she was completely sleep trained. It's completely possible to sleep train while sleeping in the same room. it's just hard to listen to the crying while sleeping in the same room.
Hi K. -
your not a bad mom to let your child cry for a bit....kids get it - they are smart! I have 4 kids, they all went through this and they all survived (and I let them cry!). My grandma used to say they were 'singing to the angels'! :) I wonder if you could maybe put a fan or a noise maker in your kids room, and then leave both kids in there. If your older child wakes up, go in and tell him that its okay, babies cry once in awhile but he is a big boy and doesn't have to wake up everytime the baby does. My girlfriend JUST went through this, she has a 2 yr old girl and a newborn, her 2 yr old was waking up a everytime the baby would. She told her daughter the same thing and she was like -okay, and hasn't been waking up since. She thought since the baby cried she should cry. Anyway, with 4 kids, we are BIG believers in noise makers/fans..it makes everyone sleep time better!! Don't be hard on yourself, do the best you can and do what works for your family!! If your kids are happy and healthy (and they sound like they are), your doing a fantastic job!
I would put a screen up to divide your room and move the baby in there. Good Luck.
